Thanks I appreciate all the advice.. just recently have confirmed that ex went to another continent to visit this dude she met on vacation for only like a few days. The fact she didn't mention this months earlier just makes me feel foolish... I'm glad I didn't respond to her message a couple weeks ago, and personally don't know why she would message in first place.. Is there anything left to take from me.. Trust me I won't be messagin her anytime soon or in future.. I'm not grudgeful but expect someone like her to be up front with me.. to think she was still trying to keep me on back burner.. meeting me for coffe/dinners over past few months when she was already "involved" with this other guy.. not too classy.. and not too fair for me.. let this be a lesson I guess... Just don't break the NC unless the other person comes with something for real.. not BS meetups.. But I'm not bitter :) haha..

I think you have the wrong idea of what a back burner is... She was not keeping you on the back burner by having dinner or cofee with you, she was keeping your emotions in her back pocket and wrapped around her fingure. If she was leading you on during those times maybe but on the other hand why were you meeting your ex in the first place? That's an A+ way to let her keep your emotions on her leash.

Also she is your EX not your girlfriend she does not have to inform you about what she is doing in day to day life. Frankly it's no longer any of your business, nor should it be your concern anymore.

Don't break the NC for ANYTHING even promises of hope. Because those are the worste of all. There is no such thing as "hope" with an Ex. It ended for a reason. Spend your time healing up and not worrying about this girl and her fling. Goodluck.

Also a warning... found this with myself a little while ago. I found a girl who did the same thing to me, made me forget all about my ex and not give her a second thought. Things didn't workout with the new girl and guess who I was left thinking about... and I mean badly, my ex.

Don't try and be friends with your ex, I think the excitement of this other girl is just covering up the feelings you still have for your ex. If you were to befriend your ex and things didn't work out with this girl I have a feeling you would really regret it.

If this girl is going to like you she will, regardless if you are friends with your ex...

Also, if I was interested in somebody I would prefer they weren't buddy buddy with their ex. That's just me.

See, I think to be fair to her, I would send her back one email spelling out exactly what your feeling are and end it with something nice like " we had something special, it is now over. I have decided to move on. Be happy in your life I wish the best for you. Good bye"
Something like that and then put her in your past and move on.

I disagree with the above post. You do not need to tell someone you are going NC. NC means exactly that. You owe her no explanation whatsoever. Writing a letter explaining that is just pointless. Your job doing No Contact is to move on and frankly it isn't your problem to worry about giving her an explanation. Who cares? You matter now, she doesn't... simple as that.

Well.. my friend just showed me some pics of ex she just posted Facebook. Of her vacation out of country with this new guy. I deleted her from my facebok but for some reason friend thought it would interest me to see pics. I didn't. Actually sucked. Now dhe back in town. Still on nc. Can't help but wonder if she starting long distance relationship with this guy who lives in europe (we live and america, and will have to remain here for couple years at least for work training stuff, we in same profession) I'm actually not overly upset, but am now thinking about if I'm OK with this. What now. I will constantly here about her and prob run into her through work stuff. If it is over should even bother to be on friendly terms, she mesg me like month ago. I didn't reply because nc and bit of gruge holding ill admit. I don't want to interfere with her ans her new guy. But what if he lives in another country. Still should go nc I guess? I think this is rant more than anything. I just don't get. She felt there wasn't the commitment and security she needed with us, why dive so fast into long distance gig?

Why do you even care what she's doing anymore? I wouldn't. You guys broke up, she's nothing to you now but an ex. You've gotten a LOT of good advice on this thread and I think maybe you should re-read the whole thing.

Continue with your no contact and just keep on keeping on. It sucks that your friend decided to show you some pics of her... bad idea on his part and you should tell your friend never to do that again. I think that perhaps he thought it would help you get over her, knowing that she has moved on, and in a sense it can, but still it will suck for a few days. Anyway, keep your no contact. Remember, she gave up on you and was able to move on so quickly... so that just goes to show how screwed up her head is. You can't sit there and wonder if she is going to start a relationship or not, or if she is going to date this guy or that guy... just worry about yourself. She is just full of games and she seems like she needs the attention, which would explain why she contacted you wanting to know how you were doing. She was so used to having your attention and when she didn't have it, she had to try to get it back.

The fact that she moved on like that, just shows you the how messed up she is. It just shows how untrue her statements were about the commitment in your relationship. She has issues.

As far as working together, you just need to walk around with your head high because you know who you are. You know that you were wronged by her, and that is an edge you have on her, because even though she may not show it to other people, she is completely aware of her decisions. Just work hard for yourself, and as you succeed, she will have no choice but to see what she gave up. If you run in to her, only discuss work. That is it, nothing more. No responding to texts, phone calls, emails or anything. If she needs to know something for work, she knows where you are, and she come see you during working hours.

Who cares where the guy lives... that is irrelevant. You don't need anything to do with her, unless it is something required by your work. Stay strong... her lacking your attention and your friendship, is your greatest strength in this whole situation. She is the one losing out here, not you!

Thanks guys.. appreciate advice and I have been reading it.. just tough time last day or so.. old thoughts/feelings/insecurities resurface for bit.. but better now.. got date tonight so time to get game face on!