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Originally Posted by talaniman

Don't do anything you will regret, or be ashamed of. A few minutes of pleasure is never worth the price you pay when there are attachments. Unless your a cold hearted playa!

We all go thru that journey of finding out about ourselves, and you will be no different. For now pleasure will do you no good, as you are still processing your last life lesson, and thats coping with your own feelings, in a realistic positive way. Walkaway from it without learning, you will go thru it again, until you get it, no matter the pleasure you find.

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Thanks :D

@girls: what type of guy would you want to date xD?

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@girls: what type of guy would you want to date xD?

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Its up to you to convince them you're the type they want.

Personally, I like a guy with confidence that isn't scared of a relationship. Someone that knows exactly what they want and will do anything to get it. The guys that just want sex, they can all disappear for all I care. They're nothing but douche bags and they only want one thing.

Hahaha~

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Originally Posted by hjpan

It has been about a month after my girlfriend of one year & four months dumped me. She told me she has no feelings for me anymore and I felt like sh*t. But I picked myself up and continued my first year of college; unfortunately, I did not pass basic English so I will be attending a community college.

The issue is about my relationship lifestyle. For some reason, I do not know what I want from a relationship. My guy-buddies/friends are encouraging me to start finding girls and having casual sex. But, my mind tells me that I should find girls and have a relationship and then have sex.

I really don't know what I should do..

Q: Should I go for casual sex or relationship & sex?

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This may come across as a bit offensive and not politically correct, but you need to know the honest truth, that your friends either don't know, or don't see long term enough to tell you.

If you go around having casual sex, and IF you get some random girl pregnant, (not to mention catch or spread a disease from or to a random girl). You will drastically alter (Read: Limit) your future, and have to compromise in areas that you would not otherwise have had to, had you kept your body and your lifestyle guarded and free from encumberments that could have been avoided, had you had the self control to do so. It happens all the time. It's not luck, it's choices.

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Originally Posted by sokay

This may come across as a bit offensive and not politically correct, but you need to know the honest truth, that your friends either don't know, or don't see long term enough to tell you.

If you go around having casual sex, and IF you get some random girl pregnant, (not to mention catch or spread a disease from or to a random girl). You will drastically alter (Read: Limit) your future, and have to compromise in areas that you would not otherwise have had to, had you kept your body and your lifestyle guarded and free from encumberments that could have been avoided, had you had the self control to do so. It happens all the time. It's not luck, it's choices.

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I will think about that =]

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Originally Posted by hjpan

@girls: what type of guy would you want to date xD?

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Personally I prefer introverts. The so-called 'Strong, Silent Type'. Few and far between though. Guys always think the need to have a 'Catch', or a 'Gimmick'. Hard to explain I guess.

Confidence, in and of itself, is an overrated quality, at least to me. I think if they question themselves a little, or if they've been through enough experiences to know that life doesn't always give you what you want, maybe that's a good quality to have.

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Originally Posted by sokay

Personally I prefer introverts. The so-called 'Strong, Silent Type'. Few and far between though. Guys always think the need to have a 'Catch', or a 'Gimmick'. Hard to explain I guess.

Confidence, in and of itself, is an overrated quality, at least to me. I think if they question themselves a little, or if they've been through enough experiences to know that life doesn't always give you what you want, maybe that's a good quality to have.

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Oh :O

You know they say there is somebody for everyone.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

You know they say there is somebody for everyone.

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Yeah, I know, I think I may be the only woman who feels this way (?).

I hear women, (and men) both saying all the time, that they really value the characteristic, 'confidence', in a mate.

But what does the fact that they're confident tell you, really?

-Could mean they're healthy and well adjusted?

-Could mean they're self-centered, arrogant, or don't care about others' feelings?

-Could mean they've been pampered in life, and always gotten what they wanted?

Who knows? Any of these things could lead to an affect of 'confidence'.

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Originally Posted by sokay

Yeah, I know, I think I may be the only woman who feels this way (?).

I hear women, (and men) both saying all the time, that they really value the charictaristic, 'confidence', in a mate.

But what does the fact that they're confident tell you, really?

Could mean they're healthy and well adjusted?

Could mean they're self-centered, arrogant, or don't care about others' feelings?

Could mean they've been pampered in life, and always gotten what they wanted?

Who knows? Any of these things could lead to an affect of 'confidence'.

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Is it true girls dig guys with 6-pack and muscularity..??

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Originally Posted by hjpan

Is it true girls dig guys with 6-pack and muscularity..??

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Some girls do go for guys who have big muscles. Again I'm different in this and definitely can't speak for all women.

I've always been most attracted to guys who are lean. I like them to have a little bit of muscle tone, but not bulky. Something along the lines of that bike rider, Lance Armstrong, his body type looks best to me. Even a little less muscular, and a little less 'superhuman' than him is fine. I pretty much don't usually find myself attracted to guys who are thicker, whether it's because of fat or muscle. I guess that's just me.

I know for a fact that a lot of my friends do like guys with a thicker build than my preference, which is fine with me, because that leaves more for me!:)

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Originally Posted by sokay

Some girls do go for guys who have big muscles. Again I'm different in this and definitely can't speak for all women.

I've always been most attracted to guys who are lean. I like them to have a little bit of muscle tone, but not bulky. Something along the lines of that bike rider, Lance Armstrong, his body type looks best to me. Even a little less muscular, and a little less 'superhuman' than him is fine. I pretty much don't usually find myself attracted to guys who are thicker, whether it's because of fat or muscle. I guess that's just me.

I know for a fact that a lot of my friends do like guys with a thicker build than my preference, which is fine with me, because that leaves more for me!:)

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Hmm...

My view is that most people who have casual sex aren't looking for anything. The few one night stands that I've had were with guys who I would never want to date or with whom I would never even consider having any type of relationship. It was just for a bit of fun. I'm sure they're nice guys though.

I've also discovered that I only enjoy sex when it's with a person that I have feelings for. Is it like that for you? I think it just depends on what you want and what you're looking for at this time in life. If you're paranoid about STIs, pregnancies, or, as someone articulated, "psycho girlfriends" (although there are a fair share of psycho boyfriends out there as well), there is the lonely road of abstinence. :D

However, I don't think casual sex or sex early on automatically screams NO COMMITMENT. Once again, it really depends on the person. For instance, with one ex, I abstained from sex until we were in a relationship. On the other hand, I didn't wait for another ex, and we ended up getting into one anyway. He didn't lose any respect for me and I didn't lose any respect for him. In fact, he was attentive both before and after.

It's your choice. If you're going to choose casual sex though, PLEASE practice safe sex!! (I'm really paranoid about STIs and the like... ).

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Originally Posted by jiltedgirl

My view is that most people who have casual sex aren't looking for anything. The few one night stands that I've had were with guys who I would never want to date or with whom I would never even consider having any type of relationship. It was just for a bit of fun. I'm sure they're nice guys though.

I've also discovered that I only enjoy sex when it's with a person that I have feelings for. Is it like that for you? I think it just depends on what you want and what you're looking for at this time in life. If you're paranoid about STIs, pregnancies, or, as someone articulated, "psycho girlfriends" (although there are a fair share of psycho boyfriends out there as well), there is the lonely road of abstinence. :D

However, I don't think casual sex or sex early on automatically screams NO COMMITMENT. Once again, it really depends on the person. For instance, with one ex, I abstained from sex until we were in a relationship. On the other hand, I didn't wait for another ex, and we ended up getting into one anyway. He didn't lose any respect for me and I didn't lose any respect for him. In fact, he was attentive both before and after.

It's your choice. If you're going to choose casual sex though, PLEASE practice safe sex!!! (I'm really paranoid about STIs and the like...).

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Well, that is the problem.. I don't know if I want casual sex or relationship & sex =/

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Originally Posted by hjpan

Well, that is the problem.. I don't know if I want casual sex or relationship & sex =/

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Hey I'm not trying to come across like some kind of anti-sex prude, but seriously, what's wrong with good old fashioned masturbation? I mean you'd have zero chance of getting some stranger pregnant, or catching some disease.

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Originally Posted by sokay

Hey I'm not trying to come across like some kind of anti-sex prude, but seriously, what's wrong with good old fashioned masturbation? I mean you'd have zero chance of getting some stranger pregnant, or catching some disease.

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I already masturbate before =/

Sex feels different.. lol

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Originally Posted by hjpan

I already masturbate before =/

Sex feels different.. lol

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Ahahahaha!!

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Originally Posted by jiltedgirl

ahahahaha!!!

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What?

I found the comment amusing. Lol.

How old are you again, hjpan?