Ask Me Help Desk - What do I do now?

I honestly don't know what the situation with her other ex is, though I suspect they are getting relatively close. That is not going to last though as he will fall back to his old ways after a matter of time.

I just don't understand my role in this all anymore. Why does she still reach out to me? Why does she still try to call me and make plans with me when she is seemingly always awkward and in a bad mood when we're together? Of course I want to get her back some day down the line, but what the heck is she thinking in the meantime?

Can any girls help? Why would someone do these things?

I can tell you from a man's view, whatever reason she gives, is not important. What is important is what she does, and how it makes you feel.

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I just don't understand my role in this all anymore.

Your role is to stand on your own two feet, and not be jerked around any more. There are plenty of decent females around, to many for you to be stuck on one that plays these games.

Please read my break-up guide below - it is about more than just breaking up...

Careful, you are in "no-man's" land...

With all due respect Gump, your not getting "it." She's keeping you as the back up plan because you are safe. You are also so far gone that you can't see what she is doing to you. She controls this situation and she controls you so much that you are so confused about this it's all you can think about. Listen to Tal -NO MORE CONTACT.

I'll be honest, I'm going through the same thing and the reality was I got so far in I reverted back to a nice guy and didn't even see it happening. You have to practice the fundamentals on a regular basis. At the beginning you can get away with it, but as time wears on and you start giving her everything she wants you start looking weak and women judge guys by emotional strength. I think that's what happened to you. You are so nice... and you know you are nicer then any guy she's got now or in the past 9 years. But she doesn't give a damn because she needs a challenge. You give her your ear when something goes wrong. I get it, because you think your doing the right thing by giving her respect and time but in reality you are giving her a way to drop her real problems that the other guy won't put up with.