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-   -   How would you feel/react if you were my boyfriend and I did this to you? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=190453)

  • Mar 7, 2008, 07:44 PM
    Delow84
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by angerhodes
    we have had a lot of trust issues in our relationship because we tend to drink too much when we do drink and people tend to do stupid things.

    This makes me think things have happened (while either yourself or him have been drinking) to hurt your trust. (that was a redundant statemant I apologize) But given that statement you made, would make me understand where he might have assumed the worst in the case of you being in the room with 2 guys, and one girl.

    He may be wrong, but did he have any history to base it on? Was it such a far fetched conclusion? Oh he handled it way wrong, and I agree if drinking causes this many problems, it should definitely be stopped or at least set yourself a limit.

    I personally hate the excuse that "I was drunk so I did this/that" I have been as drunk as any other person could, and although I obviously can't control my motorfunctions (lol) or my slurring. I never would, or did do anything that would jeapordize the person I care abouts trust. Albeit people are different, point is set a limit, or quit all together. I went 5 years (from age 18) not drinking and had just as much fun as I do when I drink sometimes now.

    Just give him time, talk calmly when he is ready.
  • Mar 7, 2008, 07:44 PM
    ScottGem
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by catherinetodd
    ScottGem: If you think giving "advice" as to punching someone else does follow these guidelines, I would suggest that you re-read them yourself. I have no idea what you are talking about. Are you the one who charges 75¢ per minute for your "advice?" Are you asking me to pay you?

    You obviously don't read carefully. I may not agree with TrueFaith's advice, but he is entitled to his opinion. The post was opinion, not a matter of fact. So your use of the negative rating was inappropriate. What's worse is you compound your rude and inappropriate behavior by attacking me for pointing out the guidelines to you.
  • Mar 7, 2008, 07:46 PM
    TrueFaith
    You're an angry person cath :) you attack more people than I do.

    Relax girl ;) show some respect
  • Mar 7, 2008, 08:39 PM
    ScottGem
    The guidelines that I linked to answer most of your questions. Again I ask did you bother to read them. Nothing is stopping you from posting a response that expresses your disagreement with someone's post. Using the comments feature for disagreeing with an opinion is inappropriate.

    I am a moderator for this site and, as such, it is part of my job to see that its guidelines are followed.

    I have not called you disparaging names, I have referred to actions you have taken. For someone not willing to engage in an argument, you are doing a awful lot of arguning.
  • Mar 7, 2008, 09:23 PM
    Delow84
    I got a reddie :( that's cool. While I didn't miss the fact he committed assault, I don't think punching a guy and that's it is a "omg this guy is a bad guy to be around if he punches people" If he sat there and pummeled the guy, kicked him while he was down, or just plain went off on him. Ya dangerous. Punching someone who you think (albeit possibly a mistaken assumption, possibly) messed around with your girlfriend/wife whatever the case is, Means you're a horrible person. Alcohol prob egged on an already bad situation, and I doubt the other guy just stood there mute. It escelated, and resulted in a single punch from what I read.

    And this is all just my opinion, I stand by my original advice with one addition

    IF he has a history of violence, then you should definitely consider that before pursueing a relationship. I in no way agree with men taking thing out on woman or anything like that. So if he has ever done that he is not worth it.

    Punching another guy he thinks you cheated on him with, while stupid, is understandable.

    Again my opinion.
  • Mar 9, 2008, 01:16 AM
    catherinetodd
    Dear Folks, I will no longer be able to participate on this forum, but I wish angerhodes the best and hope that any negative comments here did not drive her away. Come back if you need or want to, my dear! I hope everything works out for you and your boyfriend. Sincerely, Catherine Todd,
  • Mar 9, 2008, 07:06 AM
    talaniman
    Any drunk has the potential to be dangerous, and he is only part of the issue. She has a role to play, and when they drink together stuff happens, as a result, so lets not let her off the hook, and hang him out to dry, as they both could stand to be hung out for a while. That's what drunks do when they get together, and until someone wants to change that, it will continue. If a drunk has trouble walking a straight line and touching his nose, do you think he will assess reality with accuracy? No way. Her solution is simple, stop drinking, and stay away from drunks.
  • Mar 10, 2008, 11:24 AM
    ScottGem
    TrueFaith disagrees: I'm going to be a kiddy here :) don't let the door hit you on the way out :D ho ho

    The same thing that I told Catherine applies to you as well. Please check the guidelines for using the comments feature found here:

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/feedba...ure-24951.html

    Your giving her a negative rating was even worse then her rating of you. At least she was new and didn't understand how we do things here. You didn't have that excuse.
  • Mar 10, 2008, 12:08 PM
    TrueFaith
    Sorry :P
  • Mar 10, 2008, 12:25 PM
    squeaks77
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by angerhodes
    after that is all a blur . . .

    So if it was all a blur, maybe you did cheat on him.
  • Mar 13, 2008, 07:44 PM
    TrueFaith
    Oh my bloody god did I say she was cheating?
    I said for the last time.. that

    People who get drunk and cheat Not her! But Some people that drink uses that as a lame exusces

    My point is they should stop drinking and its no reason to give a free pass to bad judgement

    Jesus.

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