I initiated no contact with my ex. She ended our relationship 9 months ago, we stayed in touch for a while, it wasn't right as she was clearly keeping me around to make her feel less guilty and/or to reassure her. I wanted to be with her, she said no. That was nearly 4 months ago. I told her being in touch wouldn't work and the only basis on which I wanted to hear from her was if she wanted to talk about us.

She contacted me yesterday, it was my birthday, she texted to say happy birthday, she then said she would call me.

How do I deal with this? I am not interested in seeing her to help reassure her, being friends just won't work. I have stuck to no contact. I am thinking I take her call and just leave it at that. If she suggests meeting up I ask why. I miss her still but won't be messed around.

She may of course have texted to be nice but no contact is no contact!

Any thoughts?

I would not even acknowledge her. If she wants to discuss things she will eventually say so and if not oh well. I went through something similar in August we went NC about a week before my birthday and I didn't hear from her on my birthday which HURT LIKE HELL! But I realized NC is NC if it is not an emergency or something that is URGENT why break it? All you will be doing is delaying your healing if it doesn't work out. If she wants you she will say so. To share something that really hit me this weekend I was with a friend of mines and we were talking about relationships. He shared with me that he and an ex were considering getting back together so I said well how long since you guys were together he said 14 years!! I was like WHAT! Lol That made me realize that it can be 2 months it can be 10 years but if we sit and worry about it the time needed to heal the wounds will grind out so slowly! I still miss my ex and have my moments where I get sad and wish she would call but then I have to look deep inside and focus on Me and What I need. Good Luck!

First thing, Happy Birthday for yesterday. Second, I would hear her out. Its worth a shot. I mean, if you still like her and she's interested again, you could potentially have something for life. If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out, but if it does, you could be happier then ever. If however, she just wants to be friends or wants you to reassure her and you feel her heart isn't it, finalise the no contact thing and set her straight about what you want. Follow your heart, but I hope my advice was useful. Good Luck! =)

Turn the volume up on your intuition! Do what you feel is right.. Sometimes we think we want something because it's gone and sometimes when we get it back, We don't even want it. All I have to say is don't put yourself in a sitaution where you call her those feelings come back and you will have to start your healing all over... Because you will not get the response you want. If she has not contacted you about getting back together, This text was very generic and I wouldn't read into it too much..