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Originally Posted by redhed35

rebecca,your doing so well,keep it up,your like a differant person to your first post and your last post..looks like you have taken off the shackles and dancing away now.

great to see it.

your an inspiration.

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redhed35,
Actually you are the inspiration who give people the light and direction.
I just followed the guideline.
I feel much better, because I know what I want in my life.
If there is a goal, I will find the way to reach it. I always did it.
I am dancing around now, but standing on my firm ground. I will not stand on a cloude with illusion any more.
Thank you always.

Week 5

My apartment re-decoration project is going very well, and I am glad I started it. It makes be busy, and gives me so much fun. My place looks fresh as like a lemon. I feel much better and refreshed. I even changed all the curtains. All women should know how fun it. :)

Now, I have boxed my ex's stuff now. What is the best way to handle it?
I really do not want to open a possibility of getting frustration or argument from him.
I am having it in my closet corner for now.
Some of his stuff have values, and some have only sentimental values.
Thanks for your advice in advance!

If he is not looking for it don't send it..

Do not open the lines of communication.

If he looks for it,you can then forward it to him through a 3rd party..

Your doing so well, if you did make contact he may misunderstand and read too much into it ,he knows it's there,let him look for his stuff first.

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Originally Posted by redhed35

if he is not looking for it dont send it..

do not open the lines of communication.

if he looks for it,you can then forward it to him through a 3rd party..

your doing so well, if you did make contact he may misunderstand and read too much into it ,he knows its there,let him look for his stuff first.

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I agree.
I guess I have to keep it in my closet for a while then.
Thanks always!

If you do send his things back, I suggest sending them to his friend (Dave?) or the friend's wife to be returned to him from there or by way of your father to his father.

I agree that you should not have any direct communication with him even if it is sending him a package of his own belongings.

I like your colourscheme!
I boxed my exes stuff for a month then took it to a charity shop.:-)

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Originally Posted by Cat1864

If you do send his things back, I suggest sending them to his friend (Dave?) or the friend's wife to be returned to him from there or by way of your father to his father.

I agree that you should not have any direct communication with him even if it is sending him a package of his own belongings.

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I agree. I do not want any direct communication with him, since he can take it as a sign or an opportunity to re-start his argument.
I will think about it and find the best soultion.
It is not urgent, can wait until I can come up with a good idea.
Thank you always!!

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Originally Posted by amicon

I like your colourscheme!
I boxed my exes stuff for a month then took it to a charity shop.:-)

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I love the new color scheme too.
It looks professional.
I like to idea of 'charity shop', and it sounds very good.
Is it ethical to get rid of someone's belongings by myself without permission?
I am puzzled.

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Originally Posted by confusedrebecca

I love the new color scheme too.
It looks professional.
I like to idea of 'charity shop', and it sounds very good.
Is it ethical to get rid of someone's belongings by myself without permission?
I am puzzled.

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In my mind it isn't a question of ethics, it is a question of necessity. Welcome to a break up, where others' belongings have to go, regardless. You have to do what's best for you. Take your time as you said it wasn't urgent and consider the best option possible to avoid any prolonged drama.

Traveling Finally after 5 weeks of breakup.

Good morning everyone, I got very lucky, and have to tell you the good news.
I wanted to get out so badly since I broke up, but could not arrange a trip due to my friend's busy schedule.
I did some spell on my girl friends over Halloween party, ("oh, I can see you will takje a gorgeous trip in a tropical area very soon..." something like that).

Guess what! It worked! I am going to take a cruise trip with 2 of my girl friends!

We found a last minute deal with Royal Caribbean Cruise line last night, and we just booked the trip online just now. It is for 10 days trip, and we are leaving next week.

It is round trip from NY to San Juan, Puerto Rico; Charlotte Amalie, St. Thomas; Samana, Dominican Republic; Labadee, Haiti.

I am so grateful. The Genie's bottle really works!!
I am pretty sure it will help me to get rid of the post breakup blue big time.
:)

OOOhhh, I'm leaving for mexico, cancun with some friends on the 31st of December. It's so great. If I were you learn scuba diving because some beaches are beautiful.
Plus you are going to Samana, I've been there and it's one of the best places in the world. If you could, go to the main town of Los portillos (there is a huge community of french expat.) and ask around where you can rent a boat. Take the boat towards Playa Bonito, but don't stop there, continue for half an hour.

You'll find a secluded beach, where it is only accessible from water and probably some cool fisherman. This beach is untouched and BEAUTIFUL. You will find the most amazing corals there.

If not, go to the beach of playa rincon, it's the top 10 most beautiful beach in the world.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by kctiger

In my mind it isn't a question of ethics, it is a question of necessity. Welcome to a break up, where others' belongings have to go, regardless. You have to do what's best for you. Take your time as you said it wasn't urgent and consider the best option possible to avoid any prolonged drama.

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I agree.
I like the way you put it as "prolonged drama". Yes, my break up was a series of big drama.
I will find out the best way to send the stuff, but not to irritate him unnecessarily. I do not want to see he is repeating the useless drama again. It is very tired to see it.
Thanks for support! It means a lot to me. So kind of you.

Re charityshop:one of the last things I said to the ex was could we meet up and exchange our stuff-to which he slammed the phone down. We re talking possession to the value of about $500 I spoke to my solicitor and she was OK with my giving it to the charity shop- but I live in England so I don't know about the law in your state-maybe get legal advice on that one?

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Originally Posted by paxe

OOOhhh, I'm leaving for mexico, cancun with some friends on the 31st of december. It's so great. If I were you learn scuba diving because some beaches are beautiful.
Plus you are going to Samana, I've been there and it's one of the best places in the world. If you could, go to the main town of Los portillos (there is a huge community of french expat.) and ask around where you can rent a boat. Take the boat towards Playa Bonito, but don't stop there, continue for half an hour.

You'll find a secluded beach, where it is only accessible from water and probably some cool fisherman. This beach is untouched and BEAUTIFUL. You will find the most amazing corals there.

If not, go to the beach of playa rincon, it's the top 10 most beautiful beach in the world.

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WOW!
Thanks for all the tips. I love traveling. I enjoyed snorkeling last time in Bahamas, and it was fun. " top 10 most beautiful beach in the world"? How did I get that lucky?

Good luck with Mexico, and have a lot of fun!! Send us some photos as well.
Thanks!

Ironically,
I went when I was with my ex. It doesn't bother me and I have only good memories of it. Samana is like heaven on earth. Don't forget to post some pictures here also.

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Originally Posted by paxe

Ironically,
I went when I was with my ex. It doesn't bother me and I have only good memories of it. Samana is like heaven on earth. Don't forget to post some pictures here also.

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For me, this itinerary & this ship is brand new for me, I have not gone there with my ex.
Thanks, God! I am going to create a new chapter & new memory in this trip.

I will post some photos! I promise.:D

I saw my ex

I went out with a group of my co workers for lunch today. We went to a restaurant, which was opened recently, and supposed to be one of the hot places. The place was so crowded, and we had to be on the waiting list, and waited for our table in the lounge area.
I accidentally looked around over the glass panel, and found there was my ex. He was dining with 3 other people. He frowned his faces all the time, and dined with unpleasant face. I can tell he seemed so arrogant & mean to them.
I suddenly lost my appetite, made an excuse, and left the scene. Fortunately, he did not see me.

I just wonder, how I lost my interest in him so completely. Am I too cold?
It will be very gross to me if he tries to sit next to me in any case.
What a day!

Wow. He does not LOVE YOU! TRUST ME... This is coming from a MAN.. He is a liar and a sad excuse for a MAN. A REAL MAN do not treat women like this. Hes a little punk and I would slap him for you if I was there.

If you loved him , you would be with him even if he's trying to date other women? HAHAHA.. Are you kidding me?

I am not lying to you and if you were smart, you will listen to me. He does not love you. Its fake.

NOWWW>>> What should you do?? You feel like crap and is heartbroken... I was there before also.

First read the stickies on the relationship forum.

The only thing that will heal your heart is time.

The MOST IMPORTANT rule is NO CONTACT! In any shape or form. No cheating! This rule is so powerful...

Throw away everything that reminds you of him. Just do it! I know it hurts but if you don't do it, you'll be disrespecting yourself and letting that punk disrespect you also..

NO calls, emails, texts, ANYTHING! Change his phone number on your phone to someone else's name like " FAT ALBERT ".

BEtter yourself. Be active. GO SHOPPING! Buy some nice LINGERIE for your next boyfriend... HAhahahha... Learn to apply makeup a different way on YOUTUBE.COM. Go dancing with your girlfriends. Talk to your friends. Talk to family. Be social. Watch the food network and learn how to cook. Sing... Only happy music... Not love music... Do anything to forget about him. Learn to HATE HIM! EXERCISE!! SWEAT!! All in all, Better yourself... THis is SO IMPORTANT.

Do all these things and keep busy. Time will heal your heart little by little everyday. You will realize soon that he was not even worth it in the first place. And in the future when he sees you again, he will want you back so bad... By then you will have the choice if you want him back or not. But I bet by then you will have already found a new, better boyfriend and just laugh at him...

ROFL

=)

Good luck...

^____^;;

lol, I didn't see your last post! Seems like you already forgot about him! CONGRATS! AHAHHA... =)

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Originally Posted by supermannnnnn

lol, i didnt see your last post! Seems like you already forgot about him! CONGRATS! AHAHHA... =)

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Thanks for your post and concerns. Yes, I am done with him. :)