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-   -   Is it really that wrong to be obedient? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=441325)

  • Feb 21, 2010, 07:16 PM
    EmoPrincess

    I'm just afraid because of this law my guidance counselor told me about. If a counselor has suspisions of abuse or is told of abuse, they must call home to inform the parents of their suspicions or of the accusation. My fear is that to heal, I must be completely honest. To be completely honest, I must tell them of the abuse. If I do, they will make a call home and tell my parents of the abuse accusations
  • Feb 21, 2010, 07:26 PM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by xXxEmOxXxPrInCeSsxXx View Post
    I'm just afraid because of this law my guidance counselor told me about. If a counselor has suspisions of abuse or is told of abuse, they must call home to inform the parents of their suspicions or of the accusation. My fear is that to heal, I must be completely honest. To be completely honest, I must tell them of the abuse. If I do, they will make a call home and tell my parents of the abuse accusations

    Ask the counselor about the confidentiality issue. If I were your counselor, I would certainly explore the issue with you a bit and get all the details before blowing the whistle on anyone which, by the way, you should be told will happen and when before it does. If my client says her brother is a thief, I would not call the brother to say you accused him and ask him if he is a thief. Of course, he will be totally po-ed at you and will say no, he isn't a thief. I may even be putting your safety in jeopardy by doing it that way.

    Are you SURE they call home to ascertain the truth of what you say? Any parent, abusive or not, will say no, of course not!
  • Feb 21, 2010, 07:28 PM
    Kitkat22
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by xXxEmOxXxPrInCeSsxXx View Post
    I'm just afraid because of this law my guidance counselor told me about. If a counselor has suspisions of abuse or is told of abuse, they must call home to inform the parents of their suspicions or of the accusation. My fear is that to heal, I must be completely honest. To be completely honest, I must tell them of the abuse. If I do, they will make a call home and tell my parents of the abuse accusations


    So what will happen if they call your home. I think Wondergirl should answer this because I reall don't know what to tell you. I do know the abuse needs to stop!
  • Feb 21, 2010, 07:30 PM
    EmoPrincess
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    Ask the counselor about the confidentiality issue. If I were your counselor, I would certainly explore the issue with you a bit and get all the details before blowing the whistle on anyone which, by the way, you should be told will happen and when before it does. If my client says her brother is a thief, I would not call the brother to say you accused him and ask him if he is a thief. Of course, he will be totally po-ed at you and will say no, he isn't a thief. I may even be putting your safety in jeopardy by doing it that way.

    Are you SURE they call home to ascertain the truth of what you say? Any parent, abusive or not, will say no, of course not!

    I asked my guidance counselor at school about it, and was shocked! There is a law where parents honestly are told of the accusations. It's basically saying to the parents, "hey, we are aware of this and we're watching"

    In the seventh grade I convinced them not to call home and retracted my statement.

    Today however, there are several "brats" falsely reporting abuse to "get back at" parents who have angered them
  • Feb 21, 2010, 07:32 PM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by xXxEmOxXxPrInCeSsxXx View Post
    I asked my guidance counselor at school about it, and was shocked! there is a law where parents honestly are told of the accusations.

    Hmmmm. And there is this: All states require the report to be made to some type of law enforcement authority or child protection agency. Reporting to a parent or relative will not satisfy the reporter's legal duty under the statutes.

    If a parent is abusing a child, it makes NO sense to put that child in further jeopardy by calling that parent to find out if the accusation is true. Yet, I do know about false accusations and parents' reputations being ruined.
  • Feb 21, 2010, 07:34 PM
    EmoPrincess
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    Hmmmm. And there is this: All states require the report to be made to some type of law enforcement authority or child protection agency. Reporting to a parent or relative will not satisfy the reporter's legal duty under the statutes.


    Wow! Is my school possibly trying to pass off their own policy as law?

    I am not doubting you WG, but can you cite that so I may bring that up in my session?
  • Feb 21, 2010, 07:36 PM
    Kitkat22

    Is there a place to go if they do call ? I'm glad WG posted the law enforcement authority or child protection agency.
  • Feb 21, 2010, 07:38 PM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by xXxEmOxXxPrInCeSsxXx View Post
    Wow! Is my school possibly trying to pass off their own policy as law?

    I am not doubting you WG, but can you cite that so I may bring that up in my session?

    I got that from this site, and it is about the 15th bullet down the page.

    Mandatory Reporting of Child Abuse and Neglect - by Susan K. Smith, Atty., Hartford and Avon, CT.
  • Feb 21, 2010, 07:41 PM
    Wondergirl

    What state do you live in, Emo?
  • Feb 21, 2010, 07:43 PM
    Kitkat22

    Emop let us know how everything goes. We do care about you. Goodnight. Sweet dreams
  • Feb 21, 2010, 07:48 PM
    Wondergirl

    Are you being abused now, Emo? Or are you considered "low risk"?
  • Feb 21, 2010, 07:56 PM
    Kitkat22
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    Are you being abused now, Emo? Or are you considered "low risk"?


    I am so concerned about this girl. I talked to my daughter about her yesterday when we went up to see her at College. I know you can help her if anyone can. I feel so sad for her in my heart. Thanks WG.
  • Feb 21, 2010, 08:03 PM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Kitkat22 View Post
    I am so concerned about this girl. I talked to my daughter about her yesterday when we went up to see her at College. I know you can help her if anyone can. I feel so sad for her in my heart. Thanks WG.

    (I thought you were going to bed.)

    I can do only so much online, although I have called and talked with various AMHD members about all sorts of things (chatty or helpful) once they decided I'm not an axe murderer. :D

    ***ADDED*** For free, of course
  • Feb 21, 2010, 08:10 PM
    Kitkat22
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    (I thought you were going to bed.)

    I can do only so much online, although I have called and talked with various AMHD members about all sorts of things (chatty or helpful) once they decided I'm not an axe murderer. :D

    ***ADDED*** For free, of course

    Can't sleep when I worry. I have seen so many kids like emop in this world and I worry about what's going to happen to them. I really think I'm just going to go and see what's happening on the music forum. Thanks again WG. I feel better about EMOP, since you have given her such good advice. Talk tomorrow
  • Feb 21, 2010, 08:31 PM
    EmoPrincess

    I haven't been physically abused in multiple months, though a few weeks ago, my dad held my mum up by her throat, causing a physical fight between us
  • Feb 21, 2010, 08:39 PM
    ohsohappy
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by xXxEmOxXxPrInCeSsxXx View Post
    I haven't been physically abused in multiple months, though a few weeks ago, my dad held my mum up by her throat, causing a physical fight between us

    Physical fight is the same is abuse. Hurting someone physically or through intimidation is abuse, and should not be considered anything else.
  • Feb 21, 2010, 08:41 PM
    Kitkat22
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by xXxEmOxXxPrInCeSsxXx View Post
    I haven't been physically abused in multiple months, though a few weeks ago, my dad held my mum up by her throat, causing a physical fight between us

    That is abuse.
  • Feb 21, 2010, 08:48 PM
    EmoPrincess

    I guess I'm so used to it, I just see it as a family fight
  • Feb 21, 2010, 08:49 PM
    J_9
    It's abuse. Plain and simple. NEVER should a hand be raised to another person in a family. This is physical abuse.
  • Feb 21, 2010, 08:50 PM
    EmoPrincess

    I've also heard constant, extreme threats is verbal abuse. Is this true?

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