Exactly. However, I strongly believe that, when it's meant to happen, it will happen.. And it will be sudden.. One day you're sobbing over your ex, the other day you unexpectedly meet a new person which might change your life out of the blue..

General rule is not to push yourself over this, not to force yourself think "i have to get into a new relationship, in order to move on".. it just comes naturally.. in the meanwhile, it's just so fun to be a single, do things for yourself, even go out discover the dating & flirting scene, without feeling the need to make the flirting lead to a relationship

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Originally Posted by PirandelloLuigi

Keep to strict NC my friend, it will help me you a lot. Chasing her will just push her away.
You got to show her and yourself, you can live your life without her.

Think of it as a break, just like a soccer match, the first half has ended, time to pause and reflect and if destiny wants it you will have a second half with her, if not, well...

move on and start a new soccer game...

never beg someone to take you back if they don't want you in the first place.
in time maybe they will be the ones begging you to come back...
It has happened to me before.

cheer up dude you can do it.

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Wow, so which girl begged you to come back?

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Originally Posted by xadmin

Wow, so which girl begged you to come back?

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A girl I dated for 8 years

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Originally Posted by PirandelloLuigi

a girl i dated for 8 years

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Did she break up with you and then later ask to come back with you?

Her plan didn't work out with the other guy?

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Originally Posted by xadmin

Did she break up with you and then later ask to come back with you?

Her plan didn't work out with the other guy?

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It was a mutual break up but yes she wanted the break up more than me.

Yes she tried with another guy and it didn't work out.

So after about a year without talking, she called me back and wanted me back badly.

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Originally Posted by PirandelloLuigi

it was a mutual break up but yes she wanted the break up more than me.

yes she tried with another guy and it didnt work out.

So after about a year without talking, she called me back and wanted me back badly.

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I guess to her, it was "the grass is greener on the other side thing" and then she discovered that it wasn't as green. Did you move on already by that point and have a new girl in your life?

This was like 5 years ago, yes I moved on and found someone else and it ended after a year, then stayed single for 2 years, then met my ex that broke up on feb 14.

So yes we are going to move on and find someone else, we just don't know when and where it's going to happen.

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Originally Posted by PirandelloLuigi

true, your right, i also told her that i still love her no matter what happened and i still want to be with her. i admit this was a mistake of my part because it no good to show your emotions, but i said this right after we broke up, in the first e-mail freshly after the breakup. So i think emotions were still high and i wasnt thinking right.

i'm thinking of writing a final e-mail after the last time i see her next week. Saying that i wish her all the best and there wont be a comeback or reconciliation because i am moving on and im cutting the strings, i don't want her to string me along and keeping this false hope will only hurt me more in the long run.

The things is i am confused to if she wanted a break or a breakup. That's why i am having trouble getting this closure. She did not say it's over final period. She said let's take a break and be friends, but i refused the friendship, so does that mean for her it's a breakup since i refused to keep contact?

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Believe me your not alone I've done the same thing now my ex is back she got her life really messed up and is coming to me for some kind of support which I refuse to give her basically its like dangling a thread in front of a cat... before your ex does come back you may think its going to be great when she returns... BUT when it happens it really isn't!! As the memories that you've locked away come back to haunt you and if she's really hurt you all you can do is remember the pain and never trust her again... your story matches mine this last valentines day was kind of a curse for me too.

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Originally Posted by LiLxSaInT

Believe me your not alone ive done the exact same thing now my ex is back she got her life really messed up and is coming to me for some kind of support which i refuse to give her basically its like dangling a thread infront of a cat ... before your ex does come back you may think its going to be great when she returns... BUT when it happens it really isn't!!! as the memories that youve locked away come back to haunt you and if shes really hurt you all you can do is remember the pain and never trust her again... your story matches mine this last valentines day was kind of a curse for me too.

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So what are you going to do? Do you still love her? Are you going to take her back?

I thought she just came back for emotional support and not to be with you

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Originally Posted by xadmin

I thought she just came back for emotional support and not to be with you

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Don't they have friends for emotional support?

Hi guys. Long time I did not post... so since I was feeling bummed out I decided to come say hello...

It's been 6 months since the breakup, why am I still thinking of it...
I saw a picture of her on Facebook on her friends page since it was her friend's birthday and some of her friends are still on my list. I felt screwed up ever since. Why am I feeling like this?

Because seeing her brings back all of those harsh memories that hurt. It will take a couple of days/weeks to recover, but you will. Do get on Facebook for a while. Facebook is the devil when it comes to break-ups.

-Should it be the dumper or the dumpee to start talks for reconciliation?
Dumper

-If the dumpee decided to do no contact.
-how much time after the breakup can this be a possibility?
If the dumper wants you back, no contact won't stop them.
Quote:
-How can you know if the dumper still has an interest in coming back?
They will rock heaven to let you know.

What if the situation is based on the case, You as the breaker who broke up with you're ex for his/her cause like you've lost someone in your family and you're devastated and than you're ex wanted to experience like date around (more or less liking someone else lol) cause she/he wants to make mistake cause she/he feels like she/he can't make mistake with you but either way it's a mutual break up... than how does that work?? Lol close and long distance relationship wise.. I'm just curious. Pretty much broke up due to family issue and maybe other issue like school, long distance, etc. (for the ex's sake) and he/she can go experience w/e he/she (ex) wants lol does it matter who does what at that point? Or only time can tell?

Hope I'm not making it too confuzzled

Eh hi yes a bit.we break up for a number of reasons-a break up indicates that one or more aspects of the relationship were painful difficult etc.picture a broken glass-how often do we put one of them together and they re something we d actually want to drink out of again?NC is for your own healing a period for you to start finding yourself and to have a relationship with you.its not a magic wand that's going to get you back with your ex .remember they are an ex for a reason.

But having an ex sometimes do end up together if it's meant to be... that is if it's based on true love right? Having an NC is to find yourself again like you said, so there would always be chances in life where some people would always end up back with the ex and possibility married. I just don't understand this whole mind thing lol it just seems like any relationship could go any way just depends on how oneself handles it and how you deal with it with the one you love?. lol no one can really tell each other what to do but only you could do what is right. But being needy, desperate, and clingy won't ever work lol that's how I see this whole thing works out lol

How long does the pain last when you saw a recent picture of her ?

Few days... maybe a few weeks. It's best not to dwell and fill your time with fun things to get your mind off it.

STAY OFF FACEBOOK!

Here s one of my little thoughts:pain only lasts as long as you allow it to. Does that make sense?

Makes sense.