Nice to see you having fun there :)
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Nice to see you having fun there :)
So I have been thinking of the good times and wondering why did we have to break up. I was very good to her. We got back together with me promising I would be the best boyfriend and I would keep us happy. I did it everyday. I stood true and didn't cheat and I always did cute things for her. If we ever argued I would quickly apologize and I tried very very hard and I was happy with her. I let her slide many times going out behind my back and all I said was to please let me know next time. Plus she did it again even after we had a great day together and after she says she loves me and misses me already. Then she rushes me off the phone because she is tired and off she went. I still feel disrespected. Not to mention all the horrible public displays and I still stood good. The one time I pull a little stunt of doing what she did back after I had enough... I get dumped. I couldn't even get a little bit of mercy... its what pisses me off the most... I let so much slide and she dumps me so fast even after I apologize and go to her job and send emails apologizing.
Still I think of holding her and seeing her pretty face and I wonder would things ever be that good again with someone else? Will I be able to find and love someone else again? I miss the companionship.
The answer is YES, you would. She took you for granted, you we're being so nice that you had no power and she didn't appreciate you and show NO respect to you. Now you've get back your dignity and power, it's the best for both of you!
Stop daydreaming, and clean your room!!
I feel terrible... I saw the girl I went on a date with in my way home from work. When I got home I text her if she got home okay and she never text back. I don't think she is interested anymore. To be honest I'm really not interested either and it bothers me. I didn't see her so pretty today and I noticed a few things I didn't like. Mostly superficial but the fact that she didn't text back seals the deal. Also the other girl I was talking to is gone. I ended things because she started talking to my friend and I didn't want any drama. I only really have you guys to talk to. I just feel totally alone and hurt. Its not so much of thinking of my ex... its just feeling that now I have no girls... And this makes me think of my ex more. I hate it that she broke up with me when we were so good together. Sex was perfect and we laughed and did and went anywhere at anytime. She'd take days off so we can do things. We took great pictures and were both creative and went to rock shows together and she was always there for me... Now what?
Life is not all action, and adventure my friend, and when things slowdown, you take a break, AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, AND DON'T FORGET UNDER THE BED.
Now isn't that better than tripping over the thoughts of an idle mind? Sure it is.
You had something to distract yourself from your situation, now you don't. Might as well do something to distract yourself anew, like Talaniman suggest. It's awful to suddenly be alone though, you're right about that.
Hey T-Man... how do you know my room is a mess? I have to finish painting it tomorrow and then clean it and I will show you pictures.
Hey if the new girl doesn't want to text me then oh well it really is her loss because I'm a great guy. Sure I may be down right now... but ill be back!
You're lingering for intimacy, everybody does, just be patience! I guess you rushed abit... Hey I'd like to see the pic of your new room!
Please read the full thread before you respond to a question. Usually, there have been updates to the story that make advice given based on the original post outdated and moot. 'She' is no longer in the picture.Quote:
Originally Posted by betterfeller
Telling someone to use another person for sexual gratification and meet other 'nicer' people on the side is extremely poor advice. That is unfair and damaging to all concerned. Especially, the innocent people pulled into such an ill-advised arrangement.
Ok so it has been 2 months and a week and I don't feel nearly as bad as the first month. I am doing better. I still go to the gym and still working on the six pack. And I finished painting my room and will post pictures tonight.
I still dreamt about her all night but in a bad way. I called her and someone else picked up in the dream... She was at a store and it was confusing. I guess it has to do with her being out while I thought she was sleeping. So I guess its better than a good dream of her. Then another dream of her picking up but she didn't want to talk because her brother was sad so I said put him on the phone. I spoke to him to cheer and it will be okay.Then I hear her friends saying oh please hurry and I guess that came from her friends not liking me. I'm just confused how we could have so much fun together and even though I stopped doing what I did wrong for the last 7 months of the first relationship and all of 2 years for this one then why couldn't she stop doing what I didn't like which was going out like 4 times and lying after she would say she was going to sleep. And delete text messages so that I don't see. Yet I always showed her anybody who text me and who called. I was true to the relationship! How could we be so happy and then have all this affect us? Is that normal?
Yo emopunk! Real talk man I'm experiencing what you're going through right now too
All I got to say is just trying to stop thinking about her even though its hard sometimes cause of the dreams(I get that crap too), in the end they probably just don't care and it REALLY IS A WASTE OF TIME... most of the thoughts I have of her ends in anger because I always come to the conclusion that she's stupid
Just let these girls think they're right haha and do your thing man
I'm working out a lot too and you I talked to a few girls only to realize some of them have issues as well and it never really worked out, just got to try to meet new people
I'm just going to keep working out until I'm like built and probably get a tattoo of my dad on my chest, that's something very meaningful I look forward to
And try to make some money! That'll definitely help
On an emotional level you want to believe it was roses and champagne with happiness and love. Mentally, you know that it wasn't. Accept that things weren't as great as your heart wants you to think they were.
Yeah, when I think of the last 2 months of the relationship, it was me always wanting to be with her. I'd ask her during work hey do you even miss me? And she said I am too busy at work to miss you so I haven't had time to miss you. I was feeling neglected for a while. I hated being that way but its like she made me feel that way. Then boom off she went that night and I just couldn't take it. Why was I wanting to be around her more and missed her more than she missed me?
EXTREME HARSHNESS ALERT
Emo,
Almost 3 months since you first posted and 500 responses later, you still sound like the first day you posted.
How are you going to make any progress if you keep thinking about the past and going in circles?
Not all questions need to be answered anymore. You broke up. She's no longer part of your life. Clear your mind of all these uncertainties revolving this 1 girl.
Take it from me, once you meet a new girl, all that happened in the past will be left in the past and you will have a clean slate with the new person.
But if you're going to carry your past around with you everywhere you go, any new person you meet won't benefit from a clean slate and that's unfair to you and to the other person.
He is just trying to get out of cleaning his room, LOL.
Emo-don't forget to clean UNDER the bed as well!
Seriously though, let those last hickups go-ok?
Why doesn't anybody give me a real answer from what I wrote? I finished painting and I will clean it now. Its hard without having my ex around... im trying to get used to it? How can she just give up though?
Like maybe she did something I really hated and I'd be very upset for perhaps a week. Then I'd speak to her and tell her not to do that again but she just up and left even after I apologized... its not like I ever did that before!
.
It's been two and a half months? You've been doing really well lately but on occasion you allow yourself to get stuck in this pattern of why and what ifs. It doesn't matter anymore,it's in the past. Don't dwell on it.
EmoQuote:
Originally Posted by emopunk7
We've given you all the answers already , the problem is you keep coming back and asking the same questions over and over. Go back and read this thread from the beginning.
Bottom line is your dwelling on the past and you won't get past it until you drop it and stop questioning the why's , what's and if's.
We can only give you advice but it's you who needs to action it.
She left your relationship months before you did. Accept that she wasn't as invested in the relationship in the end as you were.
Don't forget to do the laundry and put your clothes away. Oh, and get rid of the items that are too worn-out or small to wear. They take up too much valuable room.
Ok, I cleaned my room! I just feel blah!
I think I ran this by you once before but anyway, it's a good one...
If you didn't like what you were watching on TV, you would change the channel. You hold the ability to change what your thinking about. When you give your thoughts power, you start to obsess about things. Things you have no control over. You just need to change that channel.
You guys are great! Thank you for helping me out so much all the time!!
Pics please:)
Thanks, Ive been here and there. Ive asked some questions, answered some. I had a B-day a week or so ago. That was interesting (dont have words for it)
What have you been up to? Oh yes... Painting.
Ok well as I mentioned before... the great date girl who I don't really like much especially since she ignored my last text has been spotted today on my way home from work. She stops and we say hello. She seems excited to see me and we after a few words she says for me to text her later... Of course I'm not going to until she texts me first.
Second Erica my ex who I sent a text on Tuesday saying "hey will I ever see you again?" the next day she sends me a text saying "lol sure you wanna hang out?" I respond saying "sure when are you free?" She says "any night I get out at 6" So I respond saying "well I'm free tomorrow what do you wanna do? club, bowling, movies?" I get no response and now its Saturday and I get a text saying "so you're in PA (pennsylvania)?" because she must have read my status on Facebook that I'm going to be out here today. So, apparently she is out here and she sends me a comment on Facebook as well saying "haha me too"... So do I text back saying yes I'm in PA? Its already 4 hours later... I just don't know if I should text back since she ignored my last text... oh and I even sent another the day after saying did you get my text and still nothing... What do I do?
This is no where near as harsh as I feel like getting:Quote:
Originally Posted by emopunk7
Emo, did you bother asking the 'date' girl if she even got the text that day? You assume she did and ignored it and now you are playing games. Did you leave it as you would text her later? Is she waiting for you to get in touch WITH HER? If she is expecting you to text her and you don't, then I hope she ignores you the next time she sees you. She deserves better than for you to play contact games with her.
Now, why are you playing around with the ex again?? I guess you haven't learned anything. You won't give a new girl a chance, but this female who has played games and supposedly abused you for years, you start whining about 'what do I do?' What do you want to do? Go for another 1300 posts trying to get your brain back on track?
First of all cat I have grown some respect for you but with a post such as the one you posted really makes me want to react the same way you spoke to me but ill be better than that. All I ask is that next time you speak to me with a bit more respect. That type of tone was not needed.
Anyway, why do I always have to assume they didn't receive my text?
Secondly with erica she was only a girlfriend for like 6 months but she was gone for a month because she had to go back home and that when I got back with my ex... either way its just to be friends and just go from there. Ahhhhhhhh! I didn't expect this to be a difficult process! Geeez!
Ok so I should just text both even though THEY are the ones possibly playing games! I don't want to play games and I never do... but if I think they aren't responding me but yet they text me then I should respond to them... its not fair... but I'm always a bigger person so I would text but I am just asking here what should I do. Are they playing games? I can text Emma the date girl because I understand what you mean but you could have said it better. As for erica what is that about? Should I text her... I am not wanting to play games... I am ASKING FOR ADVICE FROM WHAT I THOUGHT WERE MY FRIENDS AND NOT HURTFUL PEOPLE! She should look the other way? Please!. I should. Don't make her sound better. And I wasn't talking about my ex that I'm getting over... be easy... thanx cat... Anyway, what to do?
I guess I will just text back both of them... Everyone is so good at giving advice when someone messes up but when I ask before I do mess up nobody wants to give advice. I don't get it. Any answers?
Personally I'd avoid any situation which seems to lead to potentional confusion so I'd just let it be.
When you meet the right girl I think you ll know Emo till then just take it easy.
If I confused exes, then I apologize to Erica.
However, IF you left your last conversation with Emma as YOU would call/text HER and YOU decide to wait until SHE calls/texts YOU instead, then YOU are playing 'games'.
What I am seeing and the reason I am being harsh is that you are starting to play mind games with these females and yourself. Emma misses one text. Instead of finding out if it was a mistake/she didn't get it/her phone was acting up/etc. you write her off and start on 'sour grapes'. What happened with Erica sounds remarkably like what you have written about the other ex which where my confusion comes in.
If you feel like they are playing games, then don't respond. Let them go their own ways and you go yours.
Send a text to the date girl if you want, I wouldn't put too much emphasis on the fact that she didn't respond to that one text. It sounds like it might be too soon to make contact with your ex again though, but that's just my opinion, you'll have to decide for yourself.
Thank you Cat for being mature and not getting upset at my response. I thought you would but hoped you didn't. I can see where you got confused. Just to inform you, being that I felt like maybe you are right and maybe its me just thinking too much, I sent both a text. Guess what? Neither responded... It sucks... I don't get why they even bother writing or talking to me if when I do what they want they don't respond. Being neglected sometimes makes me miss my ex.
What's with all the texts , why can't you try to call her and talk. Surely that would stop some of the confusion.
Did you ever think you need to meet other females? Your always looking back, why not forward.
Texting is great, but calling is better and face to face is the best. Actually, leave the girls alone, and diversify your activities, as your need for attention may be what influences your choices. Hmmm, the bad ones anyway.
You guys are right... I will leave both alone. It stresses me out thinking of all this... I will just not think of it. I just can't believe my ex broke up with me.
And until you stop thinking about this and just accept it , the longer you'll be stuck and keep coming back with the same questions .Quote:
Originally Posted by emopunk7
We're with you Emo but you have to help us help you as well , there's no easy fix. It's one step at a time but we have to make sure each step is a forward one , each time you come back and ask the if's and why's we take a backward one.
You accept it by realizing it happened and it can't be changed,and by leaving this in the past you will repeat WILL move on to,when you're ready,a better and more loving relationship.
K well around 12:15AM emma (date girl) sent me a text asking where am I and then I told her by the ferry and she said come find me... Well we spoke and it was cool. She also says she wasn't ignoring me but she has been out of it.
Anyway, I am registering for school this week. I have band practice and we will be playing our first mini show at a house party soon and we have band practice on Wednesday. I made a song up and will be performing it during christmas for the family. I keep going to the gym daily and if its too late I workout at home like last night. I did finish painting and now I have to get mini blinds and glass doors and track lights but I have to find $400 before any of that. I'm excited for that! I prefer staying with family rather than friends for some reasonbut I will hang out with them on Thursday at least just to get out. This is me pretty much me right now. Am I doing okay for 2 months and a half?
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