Ask Me Help Desk - Ex girlfriend with another guy tonight

Quote:

Originally Posted by UnluckyDucky

I've had similar thoughts but not to the point where I'd yell at her. What I did that helped me out tons though was write a letter addressed to her but with no intention of sending it. It helped me get my negative emotions out and I felt better after doing that so you might want to give it a try and see how you feel afterwards.

Feel free to do it here in a post if you want but don't send it to her ok? Doing something like this is for you and you alone.

Oh yeah for sure, I have no intention of really talking to her again I don't want to give her the time, she really I don't think she deserves it. But yeah that is a good idea that you said to do, I think I might try doing that.. I'm just really mad at her, and myself really for keeping this going.

Quote:

Originally Posted by pimp_mah_alpaka

so basically what your saying is that you both can't be good friends without you being happy? she's probably in the exact same boat as you;; hurt and confused. your not alone. And just because she MIGHT end up with this guy doesn't mean you HAVE to end a good friendship. just think how much it would hurt her if it did. And anyway, this is a one night thing, its not like she's going to drop everything for him.

by getting a new girl, what will that achieve? are you doing it for happiness or for the fact that your ex is going to see you both down the street and think 'hmm, I wish I still had him'

before I post this comment I have another question that you should linger on for a while. isn't being a really good friend WAY better than not haveing her as a friend at all? she could have ended everything and jumped to the next guy. ignoring you and enjoying being in the arms of another guy

but instead she decided to be your friend

someone who wants to find happiness before her

don't you think that's a bit selfish?

WOW!! Mac is back
For starters these two are definitely not in the same boat!! She has been gone from the relationship for two years but is obviously dragging this poor dude along for the ride while she has absolutely no intentions of getting back with him!! HAHAHAH HURT AND CONFUSSED.. she isn't hurt and confused she seeing some new bloke and having fun, how the hell is she confused... HANG ON! Think how much it would hurt her! 1 how is he going to hurt her she already DUMPED him, she don't want him!! DO YOU KNOW GIRLS AT ALL!! How do you know she isn't going to drop everything for this new guy! I bet she is!! in a heartbeat!!

Being a really good friend!! Give me a spell, she is an absolute mole!! She isn't what he should be calling a friend, she is just keeping him around for when she is bored, I can see that and I live a million miles away!!

If trhings work with the new bloke mate you won't here from this so called friend in 3 months, her new bloke, who will have a set of GOOLIES!! Will put the foot down and say lose the loser ex... You won't be getting any sweet booty any more champ... you will be getting callasus that's about all... Maybe you can peek in her door whole while the new bloke takes over the reigns..

What you need to do is tell her, its not on, you obviously don't feel the same so let it go... you will never meet someone new and get over her if you don't! I know this is terribly hard, and you want her back... and you have every right to try. But let Mac tell you, if you want her back in any way, if you have any minute chance walk away now... let her see some other guy andrealise what she had with you is what she wants... until you do that then you will have NO POSSIBLE CHANCE BY HANGING AROUND!! NILLLL

So let her go and well she has been sleeping with you so maybe she has some feelings and when she sees your not a soft C... K qnymore she may give you another go!!

Give it a chance bud, walk away and tell her your not being mean.. you just have more feelings than she does... that's all, don't let her bull you with, but we are friends... NONE OF THAT!!

Hey DJ,

I agree with UnluckyDucky, you might want to write that letter, and really do it. I've never tried it but I wish I had when I was going through my break-up process. First love brings lots of pains because even little thugs cry I guess.

Anyway, I know exactly how you feel. I would have liked to punch my ex in the face and let her know what it feels like to be shat on. But I realised that I would only get in trouble, and she ain't worth an ounce of trouble with cops etc.

The only way you can hurt people like that, and get your own back is to completely ignore them - give them a taste of their own medicine. Everyone pays a price my friend, and one day she is going to get a big-@SS price tag for all the crap she's done. Cus I'm pretty sure you're not the first person she's done this to and you won't be the last.

Keep your $hit together mate and you'll be over the hill one day - we're all here for you.

KIR,

-Xm8

So things have been going very well with the NC. Last night though a lot of friends and I went out to a lot of bars, well I knew I would run into the ex I wasn't to worried a little but I kept my cool knowing I would. Anyway my issue is I did run into her and I was really really drunk, and I said something to her I wish I didn't and now it is bugging me and I can't seem to let it go. I told her that I hate her, which I don't at all I dislike her right now but not hate, when I did tell her that she walked away from me and she seemed pissed. Anyway I don't know what to do honestly I want her to know I do not hate her. So yeah anyway some help on this would be awesome.

Hey DJ, my advice here is to not do a single thing. Like you said, you were really really drunk and she could probalby tell. Sure, you did something dumb but forgive yourself and continue NC.

This isn't about her anymore, it is about you. Stay the course and stick to NC. Prevent yourself from making the same mistake in the future and learn from this.

What was said was said and you can't take it back but the only you can do is not dwell on it. So regardless to the fact whether you meant it you said it while you was drunk and the feeling was raw. You need to just move on and go about your business and not explain anything to your ex but just try to stay away from her so you be in this situation again.

Yeah I agree with both of you guys, I don't know why I'm even dwelling on it and letting it bother me. It just is and it sucks that I am letting it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by UnluckyDucky

Hey DJ, my advice here is to not do a single thing. Like you said, you were really really drunk and she could probalby tell.

That's defo. Right. Don't do a single thing because it IS about you. Now it's a question of pride buddy. You must not accept defeat and sob or look sorry in front of her. Even being drunk makes you look weak, trust me I've been there.

Forget the hell about her buddy and keep it real,

Take care,

-Xm8

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