I'm planning to send an email to my ex asking him a weird question because right now I'm very lost as a person after my latest ex dumped me in a drama fashion 2 days ago. As I'm not thinking straight at the moment, please read the message below and tell me if it's too weird. This ex we broke up 2 years ago. We had only occasional email contacts, and the last time I sent him an email was during New Year, asking him yet another weird question about my situation with my new boyfriend. And apparently he was awkward about it.


Hello. Long time no talk. How are you?



Hope I'm not intruding your busy life, but I'm on a soul-searching journey and I think you can contribute to it.



My ex told me my eyes were very scary when we fought. He seriously thought I could and I would kill someone. You told me the same thing and at that time I didn't pay much attention because people close to me have told me that I have an anger issue but no one else except you and him told me about how my eyes are killer's eyes. I know it was a long time ago and you probably didn't even remember anything. But as I don't talk to him anymore, you're the only person who can answer me this question, if you still remember things of course. Did you seriously think I could and would actually kill someone from the way my eyes were glaring? Please be objective. You don't have to spare my feelings by being diplomatic at all. This question is very important to me and I need a real answer.



Thank you.

I honestly do not see the point in getting an opinion from your ex about this. Would you kill someone? Have you?

Let's be real here. There is a bigger issue going on. If you fear your anger, then get anger management classes, but no need to dig up old graves. Your "soul searching" doesn't revolve around what others think about you, it revolves around the perception you have of yourself.

What do you see?

Lets assume you have met thousands of people so far in your life,2 have said something about your eyes.. has anyone ever said you have amazing eyes?
Don't contact your ex.
If you feel you need to do some soul searching only you can provide the answers.

I think the question you need to ask yourself is... what do you expect from sending this email? Will it change anything?

Don't send the email.

Soul searching is about you finding out about yourself and changing what needs to be changed. You already know you have anger issues so work on it.

All because you get killer eyes during an agruements doesn't necessarily mean your going kill someone. It just a figure of speech. However, if your buttons get pushed too much who knows what your capable of. Many killers have killed when they were on a anger high.

Asking him this question is beyond stupid and you need to just fix what did to be fixed. I am sure you don't need your ex to tell you this.

Please do not send this e-mail.

I suspect it has more to do with feeling lonely rather than any real answer you seek about your eyes. I do not mean to be rude but who really cares how your eyes look when your upset? If he says yes than what do you propose to do about it? If he says no will you feel some sort of great relief?

I think this is you trying to contact an ex to probe him after this more recent relationship flunked. I also note that you mentioned you no longer talk to him anymore, are you sure this is not a message intended to re-establish contact all the while letting him no your available? I suspect that's exactly what it is.

Everyone does stuff after a break up that seems crazy so I'm not calling you out or anything, however, once you get over this you'll appreciate how smart not sending this is.

Thank you for all your wake up calls. It's definitely what I need. As I said, I'm not thinking straight at the moment, I even tried to jump onto subway tracks before a guard made me stand up.

Part of me that's still conscious tells me it's beyond stupid as you rightly put. I guess I'm not going to get anything good out of sending this email. That's why I only save it as a draft and copy paste it on here for you guys to stop me.

I just so desparately need someone close to me to tell me I'm a good person with dignity and pride.

Thank you.

You aren't a good person, you are a GREAT person. Realize it. You need to know that yourself, without the confirmation of anyone else to make you believe it.

Umm Petunia, if you were contemplating suicide over something like this than perhaps you should focus on that instead of obssessing about this.

Please seek some help if you feel this is too much to handle. We can do little for you here in terms of these very disturbing issues.

For what it's worth I think you seem like a very confused but very nice and polite person. Please speak to someone close to you or a professional as soon as possible K?

Please seek counseling since you tried to kill yourself. Call this number whenever you feel like you need someone to talk to 1-800-273-talk because your not thinking straight. Sorry if this might sound harsh but you need help and counseling would be your best option.

I love you, isn't that enough? Don't send the email, deal with your hurt feelings, from the break up. Need more help, cyber hug maybe? > Hug, hug <

Don't forget to hug yourself, and tell yourself "I love, Me" (YOU)!!

Do you have friends, family, or hobbies? You need to do something you enjoy. Even volunteering your time some where at a hospital, nursing home, school, etc Whenever I feel down I go to gym, the only time I go, and it uplifts my spirit and puts me in a better mood.

I would rethink the email.
It sounds a little odd and kind of desperate,none of which is a good representation of who you truly are,just maybe the way you feel at the moment.

I like the good old days of snail mail because people had to get the paper and the pen and write the address and buy the stamp and after all of that ,often enough time had passed to not send something based purely on the emotion of the moment.

B.T.W. I have very dark eyes,some have said they are nearly black and I have been told when I am angry,they are very scary! I say,good,you should be scared :)

You know who you are dear,don't ever allow someone who is trying to throw darts at you have the satisfaction of hitting their target.It gives them a power they do not deserve.

Thank you for your concerns.

Yes I do have hobbies, friends and family. Actually right now I'm just moving back in with my parents.

Yes, I'm very confused. I'm normally a very ambitious and confident person, anyone can tell you that. What I think is the most important thing for me is my pride and dignity. Now I feel I have nothing left. No, I'm not heartbroken over my ex. I think I've lost my soul.

We had huge fight resulting in him kicking me out on the street, dropping me and my luggage in front of a hostel. We were doing a long distance relationship and I went back for him. I did have friends in that country but most people I know are international people working on short term projects like me. So most of them already left. The second he did it to me, I realized for the first time I have no one else except him in that country. And I wasn't prepared at all. Most of my things were in my luggage and I didn't even have the currency of that country in my pocket, but 3 other currencies. I ran after him and stopped his car, crying and begging, which I've never done that in my entire life. So I booked the plane ticket the very same day and flew across continents back to my home country to live with my parents.

I think I know what my problem is, I cannot live with myself being that desperate and pathetic, I have too much pride. I've definitely moved on from him but I couldn't move on from that event that just happened a few days ago. I'm still in shock.

You're right, I'll go to the nearest hospital first thing tomorrow. I didn't know I need help.

Thank you.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by petuniaB

Thank you for your concerns.

Yes I do have hobbies, friends and family. Actually right now I'm just moving back in with my parents.

Yes, I'm very confused. I'm normally a very ambitious and confident person, anyone can tell you that. What I think is the most important thing for me is my pride and dignity. Now I feel I have nothing left. No, I'm not heartbroken over my ex. I think I've lost my soul.

We had huge fight resulting in him kicking me out on the street, dropping me and my luggage in front of a hostel. We were doing a long distance relationship and I went back for him. I did have friends in that country but most people I know are international people working on short term projects like me. So most of them already left. The second he did it to me, I realized for the first time I have no one else except him in that country. And I wasn't prepared at all. Most of my things were in my luggage and I didn't even have the currency of that country in my pocket, but 3 other currencies. I ran after him and stopped his car, crying and begging, which I've never done that in my entire life. So I booked the plane ticket the very same day and flew across continents back to my home country to live with my parents.

I think I know what my problem is, I cannot live with myself being that desperate and pathetic, I have too much pride. I've definitely moved on from him but I couldn't move on from that event that just happened a few days ago. I'm still in shock.

You're right, I'll go to the nearest hospital first thing tomorrow. I didn't know I need help.

Thank you.

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I hope everything works out for you.Know that seeking help is a very wise choice and I commend you for that.We all need help every now and again and I have every confidence
You will come out a better person for having sought it.Many Blessings..

You are on the right path, not the e-mail part but getting help. Please keep us updated on your progress!

My ex (the one who just kicked me out on the street) just called me on skype. I already block-deleted him so I don't understand how he could find me.

I was on the road to recovery when you guys gave me advice. I even checked information on a hospital's website for psychiatric treatment.

I really don't know how to stay strong any longer.

Once in the hospital, then he can't contact you :)

Please link to this site I have provided and you will be able to talk to a counselor free of charge and it is all confidential.You will be directed to a counselor in your area for immediate help.Please use this service.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK

Please do not send it. If this person thought you were killer potential before they may go to the authorities now. This is stalker behaviour move on...