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soccer09 · Aug 17, 2009, 01:01 AM

Hello there, I'm new here. OK so I broke up with my girlfriend because we were arguing a lot, it was too fast, she was inconsistent on how she felt for me, liked her best friend over time while she was dating... but told me after the break up it won't work because they are best friends...

So she said she would like to be friends and to see how she truly feels about me. I'm willing for us to be in a relationship in the future... we just need to work on our problems,etc

My question is do I do the no contact rule? That was my first thought... but we kind of know each other. So do I be friends with her, get to know each other better then see if we can get back together... or am I failing for the friend trick?

I know what the right idea to do... but I don't know what works and what doesn't work in my case. no... im not freaking out, we both accepted the break up...

I'm just confused on what to do...

britEl · Aug 17, 2009, 02:09 AM

Maybe try not contacting her for awhile, which might show her that you can be independent and can live without her, and maybe slowly work your way up to talking to her again.

soccer09 · Aug 17, 2009, 03:12 AM

Originally Posted by britEl

Maybe try not contacting her for awhile, which might show her that you can be independent and can live without her, and maybe slowly work your way up to talking to her again.

I just talked to ex... we made a deal to be friends, learn more about each other and we won't date other people until we told each other how we feel about each other. If we decide its not going to work being together again. Then we can start dating other people...

britEl · Aug 17, 2009, 03:15 AM

Originally Posted by soccer09

i just talked to ex...we made a deal to be friends, learn more about each other and we wont date other people until we told each other how we feel bout each other. if we decide its not gonna work being together again. then we can start dating other people....

Good Luck! I hope for the best! :)

soccer09 · Aug 17, 2009, 03:51 AM

Originally Posted by britEl

Good Luck! I hope for the best! :)

Thanks!! Question... how do we bring up how the break up happened and what led to it after we hung out for a while?
Obviously we have to talk about it calmly,etc. just how do I know when do bring it up to discuss and how should we talk about it?

talaniman · Aug 17, 2009, 06:20 AM

How old are you both? How long did you go together?

soccer09 · Aug 17, 2009, 01:22 PM

Originally Posted by talaniman

How old are you both? How long did you go together?

My ex is 16, I'm 18 turning 19 next month. We were together for 2 months... again it was too fast of a relationship for both of us

talaniman · Aug 18, 2009, 08:08 AM

You're an adult, she is a child, and your in two different worlds. She doesn't see things that you do, and she is in school having a great time with her friends. So let her, and get an adult, not a child that thinks she is grown, as she is not.

Originally Posted by soccer09

i just talked to ex...we made a deal to be friends, learn more about each other and we wont date other people until we told each other how we feel bout each other. if we decide its not gonna work being together again. then we can start dating other people....

Dude this is a high school game that keeps you from doing anything , but with her. So you talk, and she has fun with her school mates, and wait for her to take you back. I will be honest, but it will sound harsh, This game is tilted way too much in her favor, and that's a shame as your way to old for those high school games.

Sorry guy, leaving her alone and doing adult things is where you should be at, not at the beck and call of a kid playing kid games. You should have manned up, and told her no deal. See ya later when you grow up!!!!.

britEl · Aug 18, 2009, 08:22 AM

I understand you like each other and that love knows no age limit (luckily for you she is of age) but you have to also think of your maturity levels. You are going to be way more mature before she is, you are (im assuming) graduated and she's still in school 11th grade or 12th? Anyway she still has a lot to experience what you have already experienced and it may not all be to your liking. Just some food for thought. Hope things go well :)