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    bwray83's Avatar
    bwray83 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Aug 9, 2010, 01:13 AM
    My girlfriend of 3 years we and I got into an argument she broke up with me
    Ok so I'm 27 and she is 22 we have been together for 3 years now and she has broken up with me 3 times before now. Each time she has backed away from me and asked for space. I give it to her and things go back to normal. This time we got into an argument about her missing her turn to come see me. (she lives an hour away now but we live together for 2 years while we where in collage) She said her hand hurt too bad to drive. A week before she slipped and put a hair-line fracture in one of the small bones in her hand, she has a cast on it now) I drove to see her instead. I told her that she needed to try to come see me next time, and to really try not just say she would. She got mad and broke up with me and this time she said it was because I was completely insinuative, and didn't care enough about her emotions. I didn't think a fractured hand was that big of a deal. Yeah I know it must hurt, but it's not like it's devastating. She also drives 50 min to school and 50 min home and has 2 part time jobs. I told her if she can do all of that with a fractured hand she should be able to come see me. Well she ended up going from telling me she loved me one minute to telling me she wasn't in love with me anymore, and she doesn't want to try with me anymore. So do you think she just got mad and said some things she didn't mean? Was I out of line? Is she just stressed? Is this really the end of our relationship? Obviously I do care about her I'm writing this at 4am because I can't sleep worrying about this. I love her with all of my heart and we have talked about getting engaged in the near future. The hardest thing about all of this is she said she needs some time to think about things for a week and she will call me when she is ready. So that is why I'm asking all of you what should I do?

    ~SINCERELY~ Heart broken.
    lickemlolly's Avatar
    lickemlolly Posts: 397, Reputation: 62
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    #2

    Aug 9, 2010, 03:56 AM
    It sounds like she may have other things going on.. you may have been a little insensitive on the whole driving to see you thing especially since she has a fractured hand... however I don't see that as enough to throw away 3 years of a relationship... it seems like she has other motivations like things may have been building up to this... why did she break up with you the other 3 times... doesnt really sound like this relationship is working out too well for you and you may need to start thinking about letting this one go.. 3 times and this makes the 4th... whats really going on?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Aug 9, 2010, 12:27 PM

    I suspect this isn't the only issue here, and if you have broken up 3 times already, I would sure look into a better way to settle differences. The one you have doesn't work that well, and now you can only suffer for a week, and see what happens.

    How long do you play break up to make up before enough is enough! She probably has had enough. I would have dumped you too, as the last thing a commuter driving two hours a day, with two jobs, and a fractured hand, needs is an insensitive demanding boyfriend. You failed to make adjustments, right, or wrong, and now you suffer.
    vanheart's Avatar
    vanheart Posts: 2,806, Reputation: 708
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    #4

    Aug 9, 2010, 04:39 PM

    After 3 times, maybe she realized that you aren't as committed.

    "she doesn't want to try with me anymore"

    Can you blame her? So let her go.

    Get your act together now before even thinking about another relationship.

    I agree, enough is enough.
    Devorameira's Avatar
    Devorameira Posts: 2,461, Reputation: 981
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    #5

    Aug 10, 2010, 07:46 AM

    There's definitely more going on here or you wouldn't have broken up before.

    From an outsiders point of view, it appears to me that you are the one that is being a demanding jerk, so I have to say that I don't blame her for breaking it off with you at all.

    Good grief - the girl has a fractured hand and you are demanding that she make the drive to see you. That is both childish and completely uncaring. You should be the one driving to see her and helping her out with anything that you can.

    Why not move on and let her find someone that truly cares about her and her well-being?
    bwray83's Avatar
    bwray83 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Aug 11, 2010, 06:30 PM

    OK I guess I wasn't completely clear on what was going on. How can I sum up a 3 year relationship in one paragraph. She has her flaws and things that get on my last nerve, but I Have always loved her for her little habits, and I have never called it quits. I'm a 4 year navy vet and I have seen sh@! That would give you nightmares. God knows it has given me more than a few. But I love her with all my heart. I would do anything for her
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #7

    Aug 11, 2010, 06:46 PM

    So I guess you suffer until you find ou if she is coming back or NOT!

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