What do you think about how I began the poem?

Sorry I took so long to answere my internet is horrible you can take any words from the article

Perhaps you can make the poem about nature

Or it would be easier to do it like the movie just not copying it

It can't have many extra words it has to be with words from that article, the extra words have to be like, the, an, at, because you know that kind of words

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mariapaula

Or it would be easier to do it like the movie just not copying it

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I think that would be very hard to do.

You're going to need more than a, an, the, etc.

Well...

Curly was one of the Stooges (the third one)
And lived in a massive cabin in the woods.
He spent summer weekends in markets
And spent lots of money on foods.

Is that better?

At least write down the basic idea and verses (stanzas), then chew around on them.

What I mean is like one word between two from the article for example like 75 percent from the article and 25 percent extra words

I love that stanza

Yes I like your idea

Let me show you mine

North in the woods,
We love the cabin,
In the early morning,
We spend our weekends with birds,
Trees and nature.

The performance of colors,
Sounds and domestic smells,
That make it similar,
To a beautiful orchestra.

The summer markets in America are opened,
To show the products of nature,
And like the orchestra,
They show a massive aroma.

The love for worldwide aromas,
Is understood,
And globally we must take care of nature,
So that we may leave our children,
In a better world.

I had to eat supper before I fainted from hunger. Isn't it time for bed for you?

Do you see how I did the first stanza? We could probably move things around more, but leave it for now for stanza 2.

I have to many extra words and I use to little words of the word list

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mariapaula

let me show you mine

North in the woods,
we love the cabin,
in the early morning,
we spend our weekends with birds,
trees and nature.

The performance of colors,
sounds and domestic smells,
that make it similar,
to a beautiful orchestra.

The summer markets in America are opened,
to show the products of nature,
and like the orchestra,
they show a massive aroma.

The love for worldwide aromas,
is understood,
and globally we must take care of nature,
so that we may leave our children,
in a better world.

---

And now you can plug in more words from the list.

Could you help me in that?

And don't forget -- parallel structure or refrain, alliteration and repetition

I don't get this --to me verses and stanzas are the same. "3-5 stanzas, 18-20 verses" Do you mean lines (not stanzas)?

3-5 stanzas 18-20 lines

So you will just add more of your words to your stanzas?

Well yeah like taking out useless words and putting in words from the article and alliteration etc.

Wondergirl, you're a wonder.

I tweaked the first two verses (but am not finished with them yet) --

In the north woods,
We love our cabin, so
In the early summer twilight,
We’ve spent our weekends with birds,
Trees and nature.

The surprise of beautiful colors,
Sounds, and foreign smells
Make it similar
To a powerhouse orchestra.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Athos

Wondergirl, you're a wonder.

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You're supposed to be asleep.

If the list word is "opening," are you allowed to use "opened" (not really the same use of the word).

Thanks so much is really sweet of you helping me without knowing me, what do you want in change? You did a wonderful job with the 2 first stanzas!!

You are really WONDERGIRL!! THANKS!!

Do you ever sleep??

I've been working on them, trying to fit in more list words.

In the north woods,
We love our modest cabin, so
In the early summer twilight,
We've spent our weekends with nature,
Including domestic birds in high trees.

The surprise of beautiful colors,
Softer sounds, and foreign smells
Make it similar
To a powerhouse orchestra.
[Need one more line]

We run to the produce markets in America
That show the worldwide products of nature.
There are no massive hunger games,
Just globally good food.
[Need one more line for this stanza]

What do you mean if I ever sleep? Thank you tell me in what I can help you?

By George, I think you ladies have got it.
Can't wait for the final draft.

Isn't it the middle of the night where you are?

For another stanza, am trying to fit more words in with what you suggested --

Slapstick Stooges’ stellar performances of comedy
[need something to bridge to the next lines]
We must take care of nature,
So that we may leave our children,
In a better world.

leftover words
Braking
Consecutive
Debuted
Franchise
Opened
Putting
Record
Rolling
Similar
Third
Total
Turned
Whether

So far --

In the north woods,
We love our modest cabin, so
In the early summer twilight,
We've spent our weekends with nature,
Including domestic birds and high trees.

The surprise of beautiful colors,
Softer sounds, and foreign smells
Make it similar
To a powerhouse orchestra.

We run to the produce markets in America
Which show the worldwide products of nature.
There are no massive hunger games,
Just globally good food.

Rerelease slapstick Stooges' stellar performances of comedy?
Launch a modern Titanic from overseas?
Debut the battleship of the century?
Gross two million at the box office?

No!

What's the avatar that shows our profile?
It's a glimpse of nature --
To remind us that we must leave our children
In a better world.

1. I put the words into lists for nouns, verbs, adjectives, and adverbs.
2. I used your base of stanzas and plugged in more words.
3. It was getting confusing, so I alphabetized each list and deleted each word when I used it.
4. I plugged in more words and rewrote parts of it to make sense.
5. I had a nervous breakdown.

Here is 10:05

May I have an empanada now please?

Did you see post #74 and #75?

What do you mean may I have an empanada?

You said you speak Spanish as a first language, so I figure you know about empanadas. I live in the Chicago area with many Spanish-speaking people who would bring empanadas to us who worked at the library.

Just check'n this out and I'm impressed! Excellent teaching moment, the student was ready to learn and the teacher arrived prepared to teach! One observation... see if the lines are within the amount allowed, then again you might yet be working on it. A fine job so far you both have done with this poetic creation! Maria get 5 Stars * * * * * and Wondergirl gets an empanada! :-)