Hi, I have a problem and I don't really know who to talk to. There was this guy I liked for months who was a gym trainer at my gym I really liked him, he was sweet funny really cute and he liked me for me which I'm not really used to and he is soooo much more nicer then douche bags I've dated and he likes me he sent me text messages in the gym there was a lot flirting this night but I don't think I should go out w/ him because he is a gym trainer and I'm a client and if we went out I think his job would be at risk and we would have to do a lot of sneaking around. And he's also 3 yrs older then me which I know is not a lot but its still a gap and my parents would never approve and I don't want to end up getting hurt if they find out and I would have to break up. The last thing I need right now is getting hurt again. So the point of this topic is that I'm going to talk to him tomorrow but I really want to let him down gently so what should I say? And do you think things will be cool between us after this. He is reaally sweet, funny and cute I sure hope we could be friends:confused: and pleeeaase reply as sooon as possible I have to talk to him tomorow:eek: thanks for you time

How old are you, 13 ish? We're not talking about a doctor dating a patient, his work shouldn't care as long as your not flirting all the time when your at the gym.

I'm 20 and he's 23 I know its only three years but still, and he could probably lose his job over this, its not a good idea how do I let him down gently?? I have to talk to him today.

I don't see it personally , this is how people meet, you go to a gym, meet a guy, and you may or may not date. This is real life and sometimes how great relationships are formed.

It appears he knows the rules ( if there are any) But dating customers are not always agaaint the rules. And he may feel it is worth the risk to date you. That is his choice to make.

Thanks guys but I saw him today and he pretty much pretended nothing happened yesterday , he wasn't avoiding me but he wasn't really talking to me either, he was brushing me off. So nothing will happen. But cheers anyway x

The local YMCA has a rule for the employees that they do not date with clients, not even anything construed as flirting. Everyone is to be treated equally. Now I know that not all gyms do that but some have very strict rules about that.

You are right that the three years age difference at 20 and 23 is not an issue. Perhaps in another environment, this might work. About him seeming to brush you off - maybe his supervisor talked to him. Who knows?

You were spared telling him that you thought this was not going to work between you two, because of the staff/client relationship.

You guys are right, thanks. Your advice really helped me and you are right shygrneyzs I've been spared from telling him it wouldn't work out and I'm I'm not very good with confrontation. And I think everything should be fine and back to normal:)

Anyway cheers x you guys have been a great help:)

Hi guys its me again. Sorry to bother you with this again and you don't have to reply if you don't want to. Two days ago he told me that som1 is going to tell me not to talk to him but its no big deal, I was oviously concerned and wanted to know what happened and he told me it was a long story and would tell me later, I texted him that night telling him to give me a call because I wanted to know what was going on, he nvr replied and I asked if I could talk to him yesterday but he was busy and told me to wait... I waited for 3 hrs on a stupid couch and looked desperate and I feel stupid and he was still busy after 3 hrs and I just wanted five min of his time, he said he would call me and he didn't I texted him that night and told him I expected a call but I guess he was busy and I wanted to know what was going on and I was getting a bit annoyed. I nvr even got a text fr the guy. I went to the gym today with me and my sis and he had the BIGGGEST attitude problem he was really rude. Sooooo, I give up, I nvr want to talk to him again and he turned out to be the biggest ever and I completley misjudged him and I'm hurt I've been ditched before but not w/ a guy who turned out to be two faced in the end. So this teaches you to not be niave and fall for a guy who is really nice to you ffrom the beginning. But the thing is I knew the guy for five months. Anyway to the point. I've been told I should give him a y text message and tell him to go to hell. I want to but is it really worth it? Should I be the mature one or show him that I'm not all sweet and nice and that I do have a tough side? I know this was very long but I just needed a secound opinion since I got my advice fr my sis and she is probably just telling me to do that because she's my sister. Thank you for your time. And by the way no one confronted me about the guy. I thk the made it up just cause he didn't want to speak to me. I hate him.

I'm glad you hate him. You should. He's a jerk and a control freak. Don't spend time thinking about him. Look around. There are lots of fish in the sea. Best wishes! (If you want to be miserable, continue to agonize over this guy.)