Ask Me Help Desk - Child Custody and the New Boyfriend

Need advice, help!!

I have been separated from by boyfriend for 1.5 years. We have a 4 year old daughter who lives with me. She visits him now, every other weekend and has dinner with him randomly during the week. We have not gone to court to set up any legal documentation of this. I'm considering filing for Sole legal and Physical custody with the visitation rights remaining the same. Some people have advised me to do so. We have a OK relationship and he's fit to look after her (even though he's had his downfalls)

While researching on line I came across this site that says that If we aren't married, I have those Sole rights immediately. So I wouldn't need to file..

Another issue is that my new boyfriend will be moving in in the next month or so. Both men have met and have accepted each other. My daughter loves my new boyfriend and so does he.

What can my Ex-boyfriend legally do if he's not happy with my new boyfriend moving in? Can he file himself to get custody of our daughter?

Thanks...

You really should get something formal in place to avoid any problems and disagreements later... this will also set his child support payments according to your state formula. If you are in agreement about visitation and custidy issues, it shouldn't be a dramatic process.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Natu_36

Need advice, help!!!

I have been separated from by boyfriend for 1.5 years. We have a 4 year old daughter who lives with me. She visits him now, every other weekend and has dinner with him randomly during the week. We have not gone to court to set up any legal documentation of this. I'm considering filing for Sole legal and Physical custody with the visitation rights remaining the same. Some people have advised me to do so. We have a ok relationship and he's fit to look after her (even though he's had his downfalls)

While researching on line I came across this site that says that If we aren't married, I have those Sole rights immediately. So I wouldn't need to file...?

Another issue is that my new boyfriend will be moving in in the next month or so. Both men have met and have accepted each other. My daughter loves my new boyfriend and so does he.

What can my Ex-boyfriend legally do if he's not happy with my new boyfriend moving in? can he file himself to get custody of our daughter?

Thanks...

I am in about the same situation as you are. Could you please give me the address of the website that said since you are a single mom and never married that you could get sole custody? Thank you

You need to file, while to have rights, he would have to have a DNA test done, but he could decide to file first anytime he wanted.

Also you should and need to be getting your child support, which would also be court ordered.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

You need to file, while to have rights, he would have to have a DNA test done, but he could decide to file first anytime he wanted.

also you should and need to be getting your child support, which would also be court ordered.

DNA tests are mandatory in contested cases ONLY!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jdkodiak

I am in about the same situation as you are. Could you please give me the address of the website that said since you are a single mom and never married that you could get sole custody? Thank you

Hi, I live in Mass.. your state might have different rules...
;)

http://www.masslegalhelp.org/childre...and-visitation

If I haven't been to court, who has custody of the children?
When the parents are married to each other, both parents share legal and physical custody of the children unless and until a court orders otherwise. When the parents are not married to each other, the mother has sole legal and physical custody unless and until a court orders otherwise. This is so even if the father has formally acknowledged paternity.

10. I live with the father of my child. We've never been to court, but he's on the birth certificate of our child. We never signed any acknowledgment forms. If we split up, who has custody?
You do, but note the following:
The law presumes that the mother has custody of the children where the parents are not and were not married to each other. "Presumes" just means that he has to go to court and try to get a court order if he wants to take custody away from you.
The law about acknowledgments changed in 1994, so you might not have been given the choice of signing a form at the hospital. In your case, the father of your children is only the "presumed" father--he needs to file an acknowledgment signed by you both or else take you to court if he wants to be legally declared to be your children's father.
The important thing to understand is that even if you have custody now, custody can change. He can go to court and try to take custody from you.