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-   -   What is she thinking? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=97057)

  • May 30, 2007, 11:46 AM
    rainman152003
    What is she thinking?
    My girlfriend of three months dumped me by way of text message a few days ago. She said that she needed to grow spiritually and also get her weight and self-esteem under control. She is 21 and I am 20. I felt that she was very cold about the break-up. She is usaually very emotional about everything. But while talking to me on the phone she did not cry. She said I had things to work on as well. She said that she needed a man and not a boy. She said that I did not do the small things in the relationship to show that I loved her. I have not received a pay check in over a month. Small things cost a little bit of money, which I did not have. I treated her with respect and helped her do things unlike boyfriends in her past relationships. She says we can get back together once certain things have happened. This is my first relationship ever. Do I have a reason to be mad at her and if she wanted to get back with me should I go for it?
  • May 30, 2007, 11:49 AM
    emopunk7
    No way Jose!
  • May 30, 2007, 06:25 PM
    diya
    Ok respect her what she said. May be at this point in time it's better for her and if you truly love her, let her grow at her own space and pace... don't force things. If you let her be... you are helping her... remember that and when you help with no expectation, it gets back with greater results... Don't feel sad about the pay check and other things... if the girl is intelligent, she would understand sooner or later... in the meantime, concentrate on working hard to better positions in life and when it's time for her to return she will tell you for sure... be positive always... trust and faith will get u where u want to be.
  • May 30, 2007, 06:27 PM
    Rockabilly1955mama
    Let her go. She needs her space, and she's told you. It will be the best for both of you.
  • May 30, 2007, 07:09 PM
    shygrneyzs
    Money is not everything. Yes, it is important, don't get me wrong, but she had to have known you have not received a paycheck yet and therefore cannot spend what you do not have. If that is important to her, then you are really better off without her. You can do many little things that do not cost money.

    That being said, you are both young and possibly not ready for a long term relationship. You are still trying to get on your feet. Take this time and concentrate on making yourself a better life - without her, without any woman actually right now.

    Did she say what "certain things" have to be present before she reconsiders you? Chances are if those things were in place, she would find something else to make an issue out of.

    I don't think you have any real reason to be mad at her. Upset, yes. Disappointed, yes. Hurt, yes. But mad is a pretty strong emotion and there is not purpose to being mad over this. If she comes around, be polite but do not get into anything more. Be very careful as to her intentions. Don't be the guy just hanging around, waiting by the phone, for her to call. You had a life before her and you have a life after her. Enjoy it. Good luck.

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