Originally Posted by rachie
hello,
i have a question concerning my stepdaughter. my husband had this child with his ex girlfriend before we were married, and although their relationship was on the rocks and ending for many reasons, he wanted to stay civil with her and be a father to his new daughter. he signed the birth certificate, and the baby took his last name as well. there was never any paternity testing done, and never any legal agreements set up.
they decided not to involve any attourneys, and just work things out as they go, between the two of them. his ex does not get child support, and my husbands side of the family "kisses her butt" because of it, basically treating her as another daughter in law, which casues great stress for my husband and i sometimes. she shows up at family functions, is always at his moms house, and calls my mother in law, "mom". it is as if everyone walks on eggshells to keep her happy sometimes.
we get the baby girl about every weekend, and sometimes see her during the week.
we are not happy with his ex's recent chioce of boyfriend and living situations, but we keep our mouth because as long as his daughter is not in any danger, technically its not our business.
however, my question is: if for some reason his ex would get mad at him or me, and decide to move out of state or take the baby away, can she legally do this? i have a cop friend who told me that even though my husband is on the birth certificate, it doesnt mean anything when it comes to custodial rights. according to him, the mother has all the rights right now until we take some legal action. is this true? is our visitation dependent right now upon his ex's mood and whim? should we get some legal aggreement written up, and does he need a DNA test? we can't afford a lawyer right now, which is why i am trying to get some advice.
any help is apprciated! thank you.
