Last August my brother passed away. He was divorced, and his 3 boys were minors. We are in CA. My Mother was the next of kin, and so we got his ashes, we paid for the funeral, and have the ashes. We got a court order that his ex wife wants the ashes to be part of the estate, whom she is the administrator of. She is doing it on behalf of her boys. One is now 18. She also said we are guilty of a misdimeanor because we have not spread the ashes in a timely manner according to section 7103 health and safety. She is asking for order to relinquish ashes of deceased to the estate the ashes to the estate so his boys can bury them as the Catholic religeon does, since we have failed to act in compliance with the laws of the State of CA. We are willing to comply burying the ashes, just want to bury the ashes with my Father. This is what the oldest son asked in the beginning, but we have waited because the boys have been estranged from us. In good faith, we wanted to be at a good place with them, and do it as a family, without the ex wife, just us.

Is possession still 9/10ths of the law, do we need an attorney? It's just a hearing, will we get to say our peace? My brother left no will obviously.

Thanks in advance,

Sam

If your brother left no will, then how can the ex claim to be the administrator of the estate? If someone dies intestate, then there would need to be a probate hearing to determine if an administrator should be setup and who that would be.

Check out this booklet:
http://www.cfb.ca.gov/formspubs/crd_booklet.pdf

Scroll down to page 11. According to what I read, there is NO requirement that ashes be spread or interned.

§ 7054.6. (a) Cremated remains may be removed in a durable container from the place of cremation or interment and kept in the dwelling owned or occupied by the person having the right to control disposition of the remains under Section 7100,

So already the ex is giving you incorrect information. As next of kin, it would seem to be that your mother had the right to receive the ashes. Barring a will giving instructions on the disposal of those ashes, she can do with them as she pleases.

Has the ex actually started some court proceeding? If no, I would go back to her and cite the section I cited and tell her, since the law clearly gives you the right to keep the ashes, you don't understand what she is talking about. Also ask her who appointed her administrator of the estate? I would then tell her, that you would be happy to discuss the disposition of the ashes with the boys and only them.