I have dry, thick curly hair. And... I hate it! Always have. I'm 35 and have basically have had no hairstyle whatsoever in all my years.

I am now desperate!! I currently have a shoulder-length mess. I got upset and threw the towel in about 6 months ago. No cuts, no color. Now, however, I have SOOOOOO much white showing and it's SOOOOOO thick that for the last 2 months or so, my only option has been clipping the sides up. I am too old and chunky-faced to have my hair in clips each day. And the mass of white through the front is making it worse!

I desperately need help finding a manageable style and a suitable color. While straight hair would be really cool, I just don't have the time or patience to spend an hour fighting with my hair. I am fair skinned with green eyes. My natural hair color is a medium brown, but I'm ready for a change! I really want something warm and lively to brighten me up!

Any help would be super-duper appreciated!

For the dry part - get a good thick conditioner. Also, try a hot oil treatment. I just discovered them - love it! (I have extremely thick, dry, coarse hair) You could also get a moisturizing wax to put on right before you style - it helps your hair not look dry - but use spairingly.
For color - try a color rinse to start. They typically wash out within 24 washes. This way you can find a color you like. With pale skin and green eyes - you don't want to go to dark - maybe a rich auburn?
Have you used hot rollers? I know you said you have curly hair - but the rollers will pull some of the tight curl out and give you "bouncier" curls - maybe more manageable.
Once you get the color down - then decide your cut.
You could always have it cut to angle your face and have some sweeping bangs put in. Not those that just go straight across your forehead, but angled.
Have fun and I hope this helps.

My suggestion is first to look for the good in your own hair, yes thick curly hair is the hardest to control and it seems impossible, but its not. Curls are in fashion girl and a lot of peple pay money to have hair like yours.

The whole lesson to learn is to tame your curls, best way to do this is go to a good hairdresser, if your hair has very tight curls I wopuld suggest a hair dresser who does afro-carribean hair. Ask them to do you a style that incorpirates your curls and shows off your face and body to the max. Never forget to ask for a style that is also manageble at home.

Now hair products. For beautiful curls you need a good conditioner, one for curly and dry hair is probably best serums are also helpful to help reduce the frizz and also mouse to hold the curls where they are supposed to be and so they don't go fly-away. A good range is frizz-ease by john freeda.


Now if you really hate your hair a lot then the best solution is chemical straightning, you really need to get this done at a hairdressers - home kits can end in disasters. Again a good conditioner is essential, and never buy a 2 in 1 product, you may as well not bother. Serum again is good for holding those strands down, though don't use too much - you don't want your hair to look limp or greasy.

Straightners - now you need a good pair of these, ghd are most often the best but you can also get some great ones for lots less, best way to find some is try all your friends. When using straightners - especially on thick frizzy hair it is important to use a hair protector because they dry out your hair and can give you split ends - of which you want to avoid.

Lastly every style needs to be set if you have fly-away hair and for straigt hair your best option is a hair spritzer or hairspray, dependent on how thick you hair is after straighning will depend on the strength you want.



I hope I have helped and I really hope you keep the curls, because they are soooo hot!

KMC, PrettyLady is our resident Beauty & Skin Care expert. I haven't seen her for a few days on the boards here. She works full time and visits here when she has a chance and catches up with as many questions as possible. So, hopefully she will stop by and help you out. She is very good and spot on with her recommendations.

Until she shows up, I thought I would just share my own experiences with you. I am older than you are and have had the same problem as you do for my entire life. Thick curly hair, very dry, going grey, fair skin tone. My hair has changed color over the years to that it is now a medium dull brown, my eyes are blue/grey. I have to say that up until this year, I kept my hair very short because no matter what I did, every time I tried to grow it out, it would be a frizzy dried mess. Well, I have to tell you that it has everything to do with finding the right salon and the right products for your hair. I cannot believe that after going to some very expensive salons in NYC for many years and having dreadful results, I found someone in a back country area where I now live. The difference is like night and day. My stylist is using a hair color and product line that has less ammonia/peroxide in it so it is less damaging, and the color lasts! The product line is Lanza. Here is a link to their website so that both you and PL can take a look at the products they carry. They also have a salon locator that will list all the salons in your area that carry their line. L'anza shampoo, hair care, beauty products, and hair style products

I use the leave on conditioners for damaged/dry/frizzy hair. I am now growing out my hair and it is absolutely beautiful. Shiny and healthy looking with very minimal frizz. Curls are gorgeous. Maybe Pretty Lady knows of a better one than that and I would be very interested in hearing about it. I had no idea that there was such a major difference between hair colors and products. My former stylists used what was considered top of the line and I never had any luck before now.

Regarding color, I have found for myself, that you can really get away with many hair color choices. I find the best, most natural looking, brightening color for our skin tone is an amber/honey/light brown/dark blonde shade. It is kind of hard to describe. My stylist has adjusted the color and I don't think there is a set color name. If your hair is really in bad shape, you may want to opt for a short cut, when you start with a good coloring product and use the leave on conditioners that are recommended by the stylist. As it grows out, just have her continue the color and trim the dead ends. With curly hair, we can get away with a lot more than someone with straight hair. The shaping required as it grows out is pretty minimal.

I hope this has helped and I hope Pretty Lady has some information to add. I would love to know what color/product line she recommends that would be gentle to our type of hair & what she thinks about the Lanza line.

Thank you all SO much for your input! I rally appreciate it! I have an appointment tonight with a friend of my sister. I have not been to her before, but she cuts my sisters hair and it always looks good. So... wish me luck! Thanks again!

Good luck KMC. If your sister has the same problem that you do, then you should get some really good advice on what products to use to maintain your hair. Post back and let us know how you fared.

Yeah keep us updated on how it goes and maybe even a photo? Or am I pushing it?

Well... I did it! She did an awesome job! She ended up cutting quite a bit off my hair. She said it was really damaged and uneven. I was scared, but figured I just had to do it and get it over with. And... it looks super cute. She did do a conditioning treatment and put my hair in a bag and sat me under the dryer. I was amazed by how much beter it feels. Also, I am used to having my hair thinned with a razor and she explained that a razor on curly hair is like curling a ribbon and gives me more volume (which I SO don't need). Instead, she thinned me with thinning shears. She also used a cream (I use mouse) called curls rock. I really like it. It doesn't make my hair look crunchy.

We decided to wait on the color until next week. She didn't want to do too much in our first meeting. I think she may be "THE ONE". I think it helped too that she has know my sister for so long. I felt a little more relaxed and open minded. My husband really liked it too! He mentioned that I look much slimmer without the mass of hair and that the lack of clips in my hair looked much cuter. It's scary for me not to have the safety net of clips, but I did put a head band in and I really liked that too. We didn't talk products, but today I'm going to see if I can find the L'anza products.

Thank you all so much again for the support and God Bless!