My name is Amanda. I am 18, and I have been dating this guy named David for about six months(he's 23 by the way). We used to have a great relationship before he started to drive trucks for a living, we broke up on April Fool's Day this year, and then we got back together about 2 and a half weeks ago. While we were broken up, I started talking to another guy friend of mine who's name is Jeff. Jeff and I go to school together(he' a junior and I'm a senior). Jeff and I started talking, and spending time together both before and after school. Well, one day he asked me to be his girlfriend, so I said yes, not realizing that my ex would find out. Well, he did and needless to say, he wasn't happy. Anyway, long story short, my ex thinks that I love Jeff more than I do him(which is not true, I found out this afternoon at lunch, that he's dating a good friend of mine and didn't tell me about it.). The other problem with my relationship with David is that David doesn't like the fact that I asked Jeff to my Senior Prom, I didn't want to go alone, so I asked him and we hung out for a while before I left to be with David. Well, last night David tells me that he wants to break up with me because he doesn't think that I love him anymore. He really believes that I love Jeff more than I do him, which is not true. How do I get David to see that I really love him and only him, and that I didn't mean to hurt him, but that when I promise not to associate with Jeff at all, I really mean it. I feel that if David and I break up, my life as I know it will be over. How do I make my relationship with David better again? I NEED HELP FAST!

How can you expect someone to believe you love them while going with someone else?? If you expect loyalty you must first be loyal so if David is who you want then get rid of Jeff. You can't have it both ways.

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One day he asked me to be his girlfriend, so I said yes, not realizing that my ex would find out.

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This sounds like you were up to no good and you got what you deserve.

Is David the one dating a friend or is Jeff?? Either way you all sound as if your playing a game.

Amanda, It really does sound like you want your cake and eat it too. I think you probably will need to back away from both these guys and figure yourself out.

I know which guy I want in my life, it's David. I have talked to him for 5 minutes today, and he is still wanting to break up with me. But I KNOW IN MY HEART that we can work this out. I have promised myself and him that I won't talk to the aforementioned guy anymore, but he doesn't believe me. I have told him countless times over the past few months that I am sorry for hurting him. And I am. I REALLY am. I don't know how to get him to see that I REALLY LOVE HIM. I have told him repeadly that I love him, and I tried hard to show him last night how I felt about him. I decided that I wanted to give myself over to him completely, so I did. I don't regret it. I really don't want to lose him. He REALLY MEANS THE WORLD TO ME, but I don't know how to get him to see that I love him and just him. Two other users have suggested that I step back from both of these guys and try to figure out who I REALLY want in my life, and I know who I want in my life. It took me a while to figure it out, but in the end I've figured out that all I want in my life is David, and I will do ANYTHING to show him that I love him. How else can I tell him or show him that I REALLY mean what I've told him today and last night, without having to have sex every time we are together. I REALLY DO REALIZE THAT WHAT I DID WAS WRONG. I was so mad at myself last night, that I came home and cried and almost made myself sick because I was so worried about it, still am as a matter of fact. I REALLY REALLY DON'T WANT TO LOSE HIM. I now see how bad of a guy Jeff(the guy who I recently went to prom with who is dating my friend Elena) really was. My friend Elena told me at lunch today that she and Jeff are going out. Well, Jeff forgot to tell me this last week, so I assumed that he still liked me somewhat. But I guess I was wrong. I REALLY hate Jeff and I vow to NEVER speak nor see him again. This is kind of easy at my HS. It's a school with over 1200 kids in it,and I don't have any classes nor do I have lunch wth him. The only time that I would see him would be in the mornings before school(which I know spend that time getting tutored in Algebra.) I don't know what I can do to get David to trust me again. I know that he loves me somewhat. I REALLY KNOW THAT I LOVE HIM AND NOT JEFF. Jeff even told some of my friends at Prom that he hates me, which is a good thing because I hate him. So what can I do to make things right between David and I? I have deleted Jeff's information from my phone, computer and mind. I saw him at school in the hallway this morning, but I didn't look at him, I saw that he was coming towards me, and I walked in the opposite direction. I REALLY don't know how I can earn back David's trust. I REALLY THINK with every fiber of my being that we can make this work. What I have thought of doing is asking if maybe we can just have some space in our relationship, like see each other not this wkend when he's home, but next weekend. I AM WILLING TO DO WHATEVER ANYONE SAYS TO MAKE THINGS RIGHT.

If you really care for david the way you do, then why did you ever get involved with Jeff? Frankly I don't blame David for reacting the way he did. If I were in his shoes I'd have done exactly the same thing. Sorry if this sounds harsh but you sabotaged yourself on this one. Are you sure you really know what you want? Are you being truly honest with yourself and everyone else? I think you need to take a good, long, hard look at yourself and decide just where you want to go with all of this and what you want to do. Then be honest and upfront with everybody about it.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

How can you expect someone to believe you love them while going with someone else??? If you expect loyalty you must first be loyal so if David is who you want then get rid of Jeff. You can't have it both ways.

This sounds like you were up to no good and you got what you deserve.

Is David the one dating a friend or is Jeff??? Either way you all sound as if your playing a game.

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Very good answer.

My name is Amanda. I am 18 and I am currently a HS senior living in NC. I have been dating a guy named David who is 23. We dated for six months, then he broke up with me. While we were broken up, I started to hang out with a friend who's name is Jeff. Jeff is 18 like I am. We had been hanging out for about a week, when Jeff asked me out. I said yes, we went out for like 4 days, then I broke up with him because I wanted to get back together with David. David broke up with me because I told him that I was going to go to my senior Prom with Jeff(this was after I was not given permission to take David with me). David was mad that I went with Jeff because supposedly he tried to come in between David's sister Stephanie and her boyfriend Jonny. That's why David hates Jeff. I thought that I liked Jeff, but then I realized that I was only with him because I was mad at David for breaking up with me, and David broke up with me because I lied to him when he asked me repeadly who asked who to the prom. I had told him that Jeff asked me, when in reality I asked Jeff, and David knew about it and he caught me in the lie. My question is How do I get David to believe when I say that I REALLY AM sorry for hanging out with Jeff, and that I don't like Jeff, but that I like David and I want to be with David and not Jeff? How do I get David to see that I REALLY LOVE HIM AND WANT JUST HIM TO BE THE ONE THAT I WANT TO SPEND THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH. We have talked about a possible marriage in our future before, but I don't know how I can earn David's trust back. NEED ANY ADVICE! How do I get David to see that I love just him and not the other guy?

All comments are welcome and appreciated.

You have done all you can do. You said you were sorry. What does he want, a pint of your blood. He is making you pay and I do not believe he will ever let go of this. If you two are to get back together make it one of the conditions that he never bring it up again.

Thanks! Finally Someone Sees My Side Of The Argument Somewhat!

My name is Amanda. I am 18 almost 19 years old, and I am currently a hs senior living in NC. My boyfriend's name is David, he's 23 and he's a truck driver. I am going to graduate HS on June 15th of this year. My problem is what to do AFTER graduation. My mom wants to move back to the Charlotte area, but I don't want to. I feel that if I do, then my boyfriend and I will break up. (that's what mom wants me to do. But I love David.) David told me that I could go on the road with him. I have thought about it and it seems like a good idea some of the time, but then there are other times that it sounds so stupid. I am an 18 year old girl who wants to move in with a 23 year old guy who drives a truck for a living. I REALLY LOVE DAVID. If he were to ask me to marry him, I would say yes right away. We first met my freshman year of hs, his senior. We've been friends for four years, and lovers for 7 months. The problem is that I had sex for the first time with him the last time he was home which was two weeks ago, nearly three. I am going out of town over the long weekend this weekend and he's coming home. I want to see him, if I can. What should I do about the whole after graduation situation? Should I move out with my boyfriend, or move with my mom? My mom said that I could move out, but that I couldn't move back in if something went wrong. She said I could take my clothes and my books, but that everything else stays here including my beloved cat C.C. What should I do? NEED ADVICE.

SINCERELY,
STUCK IN LOVE

One of lives mysteries to me still mind boggling how moms would know the very second I opened the cookie cabinet to only hear her scream! WIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!! Get out of there we are going to eat soon,, Like where the heck do moms get all the magical powers, beats me.

Think long and hard before you make a choice.
If I think back to when I was 17 going on 18,this is going to sound really shallow but I couldn't even tell you the name of my boyfriend.. I guess what I am saying is chances are you are not going to stay with this guy for the rest of your life.. I may be wrong, you might get married and have children and live happy ever after, but in this day and age I doubt it.
So, if the bad side DOES happen, you move in with your man, things are great for a while then things go wrong and he wants you out/you want him out where does that leave you?
In my opinion, I would go with mom, get a job, make some money,give it time and then rethink when you are a bit older.
If your man is the one for you he will wait.

Oh noooo. I know deep in your heart you know the right decision, and let me remind you if you don't. I'm only 19 so I understand the whole love, graduation, older guy thing. You have your whole life ahead of you, and you need to live your own life, not his. You may love him, but you need to develop a plan for your own future. Your life and what you make it is your safety net, boyfriends come and go. Move in with your Mom, go to school, and develop a career path. If you guys stay together, great, but if not then at least you are making yourself into a successful woman. So stay with mom, its too soon to anticipate any problems because your blinded by love. Good luck

I need as much help as possible. My mom wants me to move with her to sc to go to school for a few years. But I don't want to leave my boyfriend. He wants me to stay here and go to classes and get married. He thinks that if I move down there I will forget him. Which I won't. What do I do? Do I move down to sc and go to school, and not see my boyfriend much, or do I stay here go to school and get married at almost 19. Keep in mind that david is 23 and a truck driver.

Hey!

I think the best think is listen to your heart and see what you really want to do. I am still 19years old as well and my boyfriend is also a driver (delivery person), of age 25. I moved out with him eventhoguh my family were all against it.

The dilemma you are in, I have found myself in and believe me even after you take your descion you will still have some 'unsettled' guilt/gut feelings. But let me tell you if you think that one is best on the other - CHOOSE THAT!

Just something to keep in mind, whatever you choose you will still have to pay with it in the sense if you 'choose' your boyfriend over your mom - whenever you talk with your mum you will have those dark arguments and vice versa. But you know what being happy with the person and having arguments with the other are something which life gives us. And to be happy you have to sacrifice, ey because unfortunately that's how life is.

Hope I was of a help to you, and I wish you the best of luck!
P.S. - Think twice but act wise...

First everyone here is lame including your boyfriend... he broke up with you... you can do what you want you don't have to be lonely just because he doesn't know what he wants... was he your boyfriend when you asked the other guy to prom if not then w.e. he's the one with issues not u. I mean he can't have everything. Your young he should be more stable than to keep breaking up to make up. Maybe he's just playing with your mind so you give up everything to make him happy... something to think about.

My name is Amanda. I am 20 years old. I have a question about marriage. See, I've been with my fiancé who's name is Mark for 10 months now( we got engaged about three weeks after we started dating) and I need help deciding what to do next. See, we're both in college and we want to know if we should get married next year, or wait until after we get out of college to get married what should we do? Also, we would have to go w/o health insurance now if we did. And we might have to live with one set of parents for a while if we did.

I don't know anything about insurance over there but Im just a little concern about HOW FAST things are. You got engaged just 3 weeks after dating and now planning to tie a knot now. I know that feelings is a "magic" but lets get real here. Married life is no joke.You should know your partner well.

Its best still to finish schooling before walking down the aisle. You are building a family, so money is important. Opportunities are very much around when equipped with education. You are young, no need to rush.

Ideally it is best to have your own place when you are married. Couples learn how to be independent if they are on their own. So finish school, get a good job so you can have your very own place. Best of Luck!

If you truly love each other than you will still love each other next year, don't try to get ahead, wait until you are settled (can get you own place/health care) until you decide to get married, there is no need to rush it

Wait until you both can be independent.