I am currently almost in my third trimester and have recently "broke up" with the babie's father. The pregnancy was a surprise for both of us, certainly NOT planned. At first, I wasn't scared at all since we had been together for almost 6 years. But the further along I got, the worse he started to treat me. He would leave me at friend's houses while he left in the middle of the night mad and drunk.
He has been physically, mentally, and emotionally abusive almost the whole pregnancy. He has a huge history with drug use which he did go to rehab for but has not made one payment to and that was over a year ago. He has no health insurance, no auto insurance, a warrant out for his arrest, a title loan he can't make the payments on, (his car has already been repossed once because of this and his mother had to give him money to get it back) and has a problem with alcohol.
I love him very much but I have realized that our home and relationship is not a good place or thing for a child. I grew up in an abusive home and would never do the same to my child. I can't change him or make him care. But he is threatening to take our child away from me and "teach him the real world." He tells me that I'm crazy and will be an unfit parent.
What do I do? I don't want my child exposed to the crude language and lifestyle of his father. If I can prove all of the above, would it be possible to terminate his rights??

He has no right to "take your child"... if you speak with a lawyer, u'll see that no judge would ever allow your child to be in the custody of such a destuctive and unsafe man. If he abuses you, first of all.. that shouldn't be tolerated by you either, but how do you know he wouldn't hurt the baby? His threats will never come true, do not be scared because he is only trying to frighten you.. men like him never change, so if he tells you "baby im sorry" and brings you flowers after his sudden outbreak of anger, do not think that he will change, I'm sorry but he won't. He is a dangerous man, and you need to keep your child away from him.. and although you feel like you love him, you need to get on with your life because I'm sure you desrve a man who won't treat you like he does, and believe me, there are many men out there who will treat you much much better.

And yes you could even talk to a lawyer and make it so that he never ever sees that child again, and I'm sure that's for the best. If he harms you in any way again, you need to contact someone. There are plenty of counselors for battered women, and speaking with one of them could easily help you out. Hope this helps :)

First of all the child is rarely taken from the mother unless she is destructive to the child, which doesn't seem to tbe the case. Second you ex would first have to afford a lawyer to fight custody... which I doubt he could if he can't afford his car... and then he would have to prove that he is none of the things you claim. Just like the above poster said, no judge would give a man like this even partial custody let alone full custody. He is throwing empty threats at you. Get a lawyer if you have to. I wouldn't even put him on the birth certificate... he is bad news.

No worries, he is all talk and no bite. He doesn't stand a chance. They are just threats, don't sweat it.

Reallllllly great advice, stefani1...






Slash not :cool:

Hello?? There is a warrant for his arrest? Call the cops and let them know where he is... right before you file for custody of you child. Put him on ice for a while and concentrate on your pregnancy. It should be a wonderful time in your life, and you don't need all this stress. I say avoid the SOB for now, hire an attorney, file for custody upon the birth of your child, and let your attorney inform the court of this guy's many flaws. Take a deep breath and try to relax. Being pregnant is an incredible thing, and you should do your best to treasure each day you can safely shelter the precious child within you from the outside world, and you should be able to have some peace. I wish you and your child the best.

Yes Ma'am definitely leave this man alone for right now, I know that it is really hard from personal experience Im telling you though, you need to concentrate on your pregnancy and enjoy being pregnant because after you have the baby you will wish you did. Don't worry about him taking the baby from you, just make sure you make the proper officials aware of his idle threats and that way they can guide you in the right direction of filing full custody, if that is the route you want to go. Make sure if you want to get child support from him that he signs the parental affidavit at the hospital, but if you want this to be the end and I mean definitely the end (which I don't think you do from your post) cut contact with him. Good Luck, if you would like to talk please feel free to email me, I went through and am going through the same thing you are including the abuse and lies and drugs. Feel free to message me I am always there to listen to you which I know is probably what you need the most right now, someone just to vent to and try to figure out why all this is happening.