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-   -   I can't believe my friend (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=95401)

  • May 24, 2007, 04:27 AM
    nosi
    I can't believe my friend
    My best friend is going out with this guy that I introduced her to and they've been going out for eight months, I feel like ever since they've started going out our friendship is growing apart cause it seems like she doesn't have time for me anymore. She's forever sleeping at this guy's house but hardly sleeps at my house anymore. I don't know if I'm being selfish, but I feel like she's chosen him over me, cause she sometimes sleeps over at his house while I'm visiting her. Please tell me if I'm being selfish
  • May 24, 2007, 04:29 AM
    Squiffy
    You are not being selfish, but they are young and in love and still in that honeymoon period of a relationship when you can be blinded by love! It does wear off and they will probably soon both get a little bored of spending all their time together and not seeing their own friends, and she will spend more time with you.
  • May 31, 2007, 12:59 PM
    chris_in_orbit
    I don't think you're selfish, you just really care about the relationship you have with this person, that is really sweet and it makes you a good friend. Even more so by the fact that you introduced them to each other in the first place. Sadly, love takes priority over friendship no matter how you look at it. It is extremely unfortunate to become distant from a good friend but sometimes you have to move on and if she comes back after you've moved on then it'll be more a pleasant surprise wouldn't it?

    Start building up relationships with other people, I'm not saying replace her but its definitely a good time to meet new people. Now that this friend is preoccupied you won't have to feel guilty about doing this either.. The last thing you want to do is become jealous and act on it. This will only push her away.
  • Jun 15, 2007, 11:02 AM
    Illusion
    I agree with Chris that you need to move on and make other friends. I know you like her but she is preoccupied with her boyfriend. It is too bad that she cannot be a friend to you and still have a boyfriend.

    I want to advise you about something. I had a good friend all through school. We were great friends but every time she hooked up with someone - she was gone and I would not hear from her for several months - sometimes a year or more. I did not mind but eventually I realized that she only came around when she was not with some guy. She did not want to get together with me - supposedly never had time - or talk on the phone when some guy was involved. And never mind that I had to listen to all her drama about all the fruitcakes she dated when she was suddenly "available" to have lunch, coffee, etc.

    Anyway, the moral of the story is - set healthy boundaries for yourself. Go out with friends, date, have fun. If YOU are available by all means go out with her but start setting-up your own activities.
  • Jul 22, 2007, 07:19 PM
    CommonSense2007
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by nosi
    my best friend is going out with this guy that i introduced her to and they've been going out for eight months, i feel like ever since they've started going out our friendship is growing apart cause it seems like she doesn't have time for me anymore. She's forever sleeping at this guy's house but hardly sleeps at my house anymore. i don't know if i'm being selfish, but i feel like she's chosen him over me, cause she sometimes sleeps over at his house while i'm visiting her. Please tell me if i'm being selfish

    I always feel that girlfriends should make an effort to do things together even if she's in a hot and heavy romance. She should spend time with her man, but also want to hang out with you too because if boyfriend kicks her to the curb, guess who she's going to come crying to? I don't think you're selfish. Just let your friend know how you feel and see if she agrees... if she's a good friend she'll slap herself on the side of the head and say, 'oh yes, let's go do something together, just the two of us.' If not, maybe she isn't such a good friend after all.
  • May 9, 2012, 06:33 AM
    CmoneyShotcallR
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by nosi View Post
    my best friend is going out with this guy that i introduced her to and they've been going out for eight months, i feel like ever since they've started going out our friendship is growing apart cause it seems like she doesn't have time for me anymore. She's forever sleeping at this guy's house but hardly sleeps at my house anymore. i don't know if i'm being selfish, but i feel like she's chosen him over me, cause she sometimes sleeps over at his house while i'm visiting her. Please tell me if i'm being selfish

    Yeah What

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