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-   -   Don't know what to do (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=93205)

  • May 16, 2007, 11:22 AM
    MichelleA
    Don't know what to do
    My hubby and I have been together for 8 years this fall. During most of our relationship I have been accused of cheating and "not being interested in sex", although his attitude toward me speaking to other people has mellowed through the years he still swears I do not want to have anything to do with him. As if that were not enough he recently went through a series of surgeries and was very ill ( please don't ask). Because of the surgeries he feels like his body is deformed and is even more insecure about things then he was before. So last September he decided that he did not want to sleep in the same bed as me and I moved into the guest bedroom, with his new rule if "his door is closed I am to stay out." (and vice versa). The strange thing is that he would come in when I was getting ready for bed and make my bed (I have never made bed except when I was in the army :o ) and bring me my water and try to be all sweet, never giving me the chance to close my door if I wanted some privacy. Well a couple of weeks ago I mentioned it to him and since then he treats me like crap. He barely speaks to me, and if I am watching a TV show he will just come up and turn the channel as if I am not there.
    Anyway I am new to posting so I am not sure how much more detail I should put here. If anyone has any suggestions on what I can do please help!
  • May 16, 2007, 04:27 PM
    MicheleEB
    Ummm, counseling?
  • May 16, 2007, 04:34 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    Mace the next time he walks in without permission, and change the TV back and mace him again if he changes it??

    But you could try counseling if he would go. Get a TV for your own room
    Change the locks the next time he goes out and file for divorce ?
  • May 16, 2007, 04:39 PM
    JoeCanada76
    Couples, being apart and living separate lives and in separate rooms and bed. I am sorry to say this but the marriage is pretty much over. I hope that you take everybody else's advice. Start counseling. Offer the counseling as a couple. If you both want to start making it work it could, nothing is impossible. If he does not even want to give it a chanch go to counseling yourself and make changes that will better your life.
  • May 16, 2007, 05:05 PM
    gypsy456
    Go to counseling, either together or by yourself.

    If together then it will hopefully help you marriage.

    If by yourself, then it will hopefully give you the insights to move on.

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