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-   -   Relationship issue (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=92489)

  • May 14, 2007, 01:17 PM
    garnettmarshall
    Relationship issue
    I am seeing this man and have been for 1 and a half years. He had a birthday recently and received a present on his door from his ex girlfriend. The card reads blah blah blah and love always her name and xoxoxo.

    She wants him back doesn't she? Or is he leading her on? Why else would she have brought a gift to his house, knowing they were done and he was with me?

    :(
  • May 14, 2007, 01:20 PM
    Lowtax4eva
    Has he been keeping contact with her in the last year and a half? If so, in what way?
  • May 14, 2007, 01:24 PM
    shygrneyzs
    The ex girlfriend may not want him back at all - giving her the benefit of the doubt - she was likely trying to just be nice and not putting any meaning in the gift beyond friendship.
    I would let it go.

    On the other hand, what was his reaction to this gift? Has he ever talked about this ex girlfriend in the 1 1/2 yrs you two have been together? Has she ever tried to contact him and has he ever tried to contact her? Did his attitude towards you change at all when he got this gift? Have his mannerisms or behaviors toward you changed?

    If things are basically the same between you two, then just write this off as a gift and nothing more. Take him at his word as you really do not have anything else to go on. If you are really suspicious you know the signs to watch for.

    But... why bother trouble by being troubled? Just enjoy your relationship and don't let the ex girlfriend get under your skin.
  • May 14, 2007, 04:33 PM
    talaniman
    Oh please if all you have is a birthday card, then get over your jealousy and insecurity. Why make an issue where none exists. What if your ex gave you a birthday card, and he went ballistic, would that be stupid to you?
  • May 14, 2007, 04:36 PM
    Jiser
    I send a birthday card to my ex or friends, people I haven't seen for years? So what... :P Its just a nice gesture.
  • May 14, 2007, 05:48 PM
    Stunning07
    no matter what you do just try not to talk to him about that girl it shows that your jelous and you don't want that at all don't worry about it too mcuh, and don't worry if he still cares for her I'm pretty sure everyone still cares for there x's
  • May 16, 2007, 05:15 AM
    mckenzie134
    Don't worry about it. Your with him so don't even bring it up. Your betterthan her. But if he starts talking about her then you need to stand firm and back right off and say listen maybe your not over her and give him some time cause if you do this he will be all over you but if you worry about it he will push you away.
  • May 16, 2007, 05:41 AM
    lisalou
    I got annoyed once as I found a card from my boyfriends ex - saying ' to my darling blah blah blah (including his middle name!) - all the love in the world and back again, please come see me in cardiff' - he said that was just the way she was but I got him to mail her to ask her not to write stuff like that again. Which put a stop to it! If its harmless then don't make an issue but if it steps over then say something
  • May 16, 2007, 08:41 AM
    AW805
    Obviously it was intended for you to see. I think she's saying hey I'm still out here - hoping to get a reaction from you. Don't let it bother you. He's with you.
  • May 16, 2007, 08:46 AM
    krystal1973
    She was probably just trying to upset you, Don't let her!
    Also if they had something going why did she have to leave it on the door, if they had something going she would have just given it to him in person.

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