Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Relationships (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=277)
-   -   Is my ex-girlfriends relationship a rebound? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=92295)

  • May 13, 2007, 10:11 PM
    thunder8671
    Is my ex-girlfriends relationship a rebound?
    Me and my ex girlfriend have been broken up for almost 2 months now. She hasa new boyfriend now. He was the guy who was there fir her after the break up. After 2 weeks and she saidshe is in love with him. In the same token she said if they ever were to break up that we would be going out again. Is this guy a rebound? How long do rebounds usually last? If so how should I act and what should I do? What steps to I take to win her back? I really love this girl and I honestly see her as my wife one day.
  • May 14, 2007, 03:04 AM
    tickle
    I guess this is a rebound situation. Just hang in there, be her friend, be supportive and maybe she will realize where she should be eventually.
  • May 14, 2007, 03:05 AM
    Jiser
    Get your own life without her and abide by no contact. If she rings don't answer, be less available, get a new direction in life and make that your passion. You may find she rings you may find she doesn't but until your healed don't count on anything. Keep busy and enjoy life.
  • May 14, 2007, 03:08 AM
    phoenix1664
    If you love her as you say don't just forget her but don't hang on her too much, for all you know she might have only said what she said to keep you around as a rebound or a fall back boy friend, continue with you live but don't dissmiss her completely be friends.
  • May 14, 2007, 03:23 AM
    Jiser
    I kind of disagree with the above statements. You cannot be friends with an ex until you have some alone time after the break up. You both need space to assess your life, what you want from it etc. Its hard on both dumpee and dumper!

    Also do you want to be sloppy seconds? Nobody does and have some dignity, being single, happy and keeping busy is a lot more attractive to her than groveling to her and hanging on her last sentence - If we break up we can go back out. RUBBISH!!

    You get your own life, abide by no contact, do things you allways wanted to do, go out and party, spend time with friends and renew old social ties. Don't mope around at home. Have things to look forward to. The best revenge is to be happy and to move on, you may find she comes back around in time but you need to do that moving on bit for the time being. Realistically you need 2-8 months to do this maybe more. Until starting light contact again that's if you want to. Be time that time comes around you may not want to go back.

    Ive been split up from my ex for about 4 months. We had light contact on MSN for about 1 half. Its been hell but I am getting OK with life now finally. Keeping busy, trying new things, never letting an invite down and having things to look forward to has helped me so much. Plus a great bunch of friends + GYM :)

    My ex and are going to meeting up on her birthday with her and my friends. Plus she wants to meet up for drinks with me. So who knows where that will lead. Trust me though have your own life, keep it slow, keep yourself busy and play it cool - its far more attractive. I don't need anyone to be happy and neither do you!
  • May 14, 2007, 03:38 AM
    phoenix1664
    Well thanks for not going straingt to the dissagree thing, I agree you cannot split the go striaght back into the relationship you need time to sort out your life and feelings but if you dissmiss the person completely then you will never know what could have happened, I agree with the groveling that would just seem way to desperate. But you said break upbut we can go back out RUBBISH!! and yet you are meeting up with your ex and don't know where it might go it just goes to show you never know what the future hold for any of us really, I suppose everyone has there own way of delaing iwht things, all in all I think its good advice Jiser.
  • May 14, 2007, 03:44 AM
    Jiser
    Well we've been split for four months. No phone calls, just light IM after 2 months. I am just keeping it cool for now. If were friends that's cool, it would be nice, if she wants more then were see, keeping it slow, if nothing happens then o well. I have a great life, she doesn't! I have so much planned that in all honesty I don't really care that much.

    In my four months Ive had a lot of time to do some thinking. I know what was bad and what we both did wrong. What I am saying is you need that considerable time alone to consult your feelings. You can't do anything rationale str8 after a break up.

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 01:17 AM.