I am a Christian young lady, and a mother of three children. I try to live my life right as best I can and maintain a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. At this particular time in my life, I am standing at a crossroads, unsure of which way to turn. I have been in an abusive marriage for 10 years now. There has been physical abuse in the past, and things have gotten very bad before. There has not been any physical abuse now for about 18 months. The verbal and emotional abuse has continued however. I have been given the opportunity to leave now and begin a new life. I am not sure whether to take it. I am so unsure of what to do, because the Bible is so unclear on divorce. It seems that adultery is the only grounds for divorce. I want so much to do what is right in my life. I do not want to step out of the will of God. I feel that I am in so many ways bound to this marriage, and don't have the support of my family even though they are aware of the abuse. So what does the Bible REALLY say about divorce. The topic of abuse or domestic violence is not covered. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

First no matte what we do, no matter what, we can be forgiven, that is the main thing of the bible. So bibically, you would speak to your family and to the church elders who would come over and explain to him that they will exercise him out of the community if he continued to abuse you, and your family, brothers, cousins uncles would come over and explain to him that if he harms you, they would kill him. ( basic old testement)
Remember women in bibical times were property, and not having the rights and freedoms. A man committing adultry would have gotten a divorce, the women would have been stoned. So it was not equal at all.

But God does not want anyone to be at risk, esp where there are children,
So separate, who said you had to divorce for now, bet you within a year of you being gone, the adultry will happen, if it has not already and you don't know, my guess 90 percent of abusive women do adultry also.

Move out, keep you and your family safe above all things, keep in prayer that the husband will repent, find Christ and be saved ( and turn his life around) but if it does not, the divorce issue will take care of itself,

I totally agree with FR_CHUCK on this one!

Jesus does not want you to suffer, first of all, no matter what! That is why he died on the cross for our sins! He loves us, we are his children... would you want your children to stay in this type of relationship... my guess, NO! You love them and want the best for them, Jesus feels the same for you. Jesus is a very forgiving God and does not want you to suffer.

If you can get out... GET OUT!! You don't have to divorce right now, get a separation agreement and put divorce on hold for a bit, see how things go. He may see what he has lost and get help and change OR he can keep traveling this destructive path, which you don't want to be a part of.

I will have to say that it is a unique quality for you to have to stay and try to live by the Bible, but sometimes you have to GET OUT!!


Good Luck and God Loves You!

The bible is clear on marriage and how marriage is suppose to work and what is grounds for ending marriage.

Bible is clear that idultery is the clear sin that gives the parnter a good reason to divorce a partner because of not being faithful.

The vows when getting married is through sickness and health, through good times and bad times. The man cleaves to the women, the women cleaves to the man and they become one.

First,

you say there is verbal and emotional abuse? What do you consider emotional and verbal?

Second,

Both partners are supposed to support each other and become one. Whenever there is a break down of communication, or break down of any kind because of any kind of abuse.

It should be always recorded and reported. Also know that there are steps to take in a troubled marriage. Counseling for both couples. There are these steps in certain situations that need to be followed before getting out of a marriage. In a situation, where there is threats and actual actions of bodily harm. Report and get out.

This situation for some reason seems different for me and I do not believe you need to immediately jump ship. Have you tried counseling? Changes?

If yes, and nothing has changed then you need to make plans of getting out.

Hope and pray for the best for you. If you can not find the answer in the bible. You need to look within your heart because that is where it will come from.

Best wishes.

Joe

Because God has his own plan for things, I can offer you these two scriptures so that you can ask Him directly what he wants you to do: James 1 1:5-9. And expect Him to answer you out of faith Psalm 119 verse 49-50. God bless.