Hi I'm seventeen and turn 18 in august-wanting to be pregnant, I have been trying for nearly 8 months now with my partner- and I know I really want this. After eight months of unprotected sex , makes me wonder why I can't get preganant. I'm really worried I will never be able to have a child of my own and I'm also worried that the doctor won't help me because of my age. Could anyone suggest anything that may be able to help? Thank you natalie

About having a baby:

18 years of work work work... and no pay.

The doctor has no right to not help you because of your age. If you have been trying to get a baby and can't after that long, then you need to schedule an appointment and tell the doctor. He can tell you the problem if any. And if so, he can suggest ways to still have a baby. Keep me updated.

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Let's start by exploring why you want to have a baby at such a young age.

Do you have a great job with wonderful pay and benefits?

Can you afford the diapers, formula, baby food, clothes, doctor visits, hospital visits, etc.

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I was pregnant at 18 and my, 'partner', and I were financially stable.
Formula is not that expensive, either is diapers, baby food.
Most Mothers, young or not rely on breast milk because they too know how beneficial breast milk is for babies.

There's also always the option of cloth nappies, which are environmentally better.
Modern cloth nappies are expensive but they are wonderful and comfortable for your baby.

Making your own baby food is always healthier and fresher.

Let us not generalise the minority of BAD YOUNG Mothers because these types of replies are warranted.:D

Formula is not that expensive? Since when? Add to that factor any special dietary concerns - not all babies can drink the same formula and not all babies can tolerate breast milk.

You are 17 - you are still a minor. Going to your doctor for fertility counseling? Having a baby sounds so cute when you are that young until you have one at age 17 and spend the next 18 or more years always placing the needs of that child first. Remember that - the needs of the child come first. Yours come second or third or fourth or last. You say you are going to be 18 soon. About your boyfriend - how do you know that he will remain there with you and the child while his high school buddies go out and he cannot go with.

At 17 and 18 you two are not pulling down a lot of money. Are you planning on relying on AFDC, housing assistance, food stamps, medicaid, WIC, fuel assistance? How do you imagine you would take care of medical emergencies with the child?

I am not saying you would be a bad mom but you are not using good judgement.

OK look I wanted a baby and wanted to get pregnant so bad but now thati am pregnant I never knew how many pains and discomforts came along with it and you have so many things that could go wrong and you freak over the little things then panic over the big one I have learened that I should have waited till I was older and wiser its hard to think of someone else before you think of you self I know that you are probably thinking this chick don't know what she's talking about well I'm trying to help you you're a baby so am I and I didn't think that I would ever wish I had waited but me and the guy that I am pregnant by where together off and on for 5 years and we lived together and everything then I told him I was pregnant he said its not mine and we are over for good well I regreat him and I wish I would have been able to see that he was lying every time he said I want a baby I want us to be a family well five months into my pregnancy I have not heard from him at all and it hurts o think I was with this guy for five years and didn't know him better than that but it goes to show how long you can be with someone and still not know them and on top of that now my child will be father less and I wish I would have waited

To start, the only answer that is the true answer here. You have not fallen pregnant yet because it is just not the right time.

Also the harder you try guess what your going to have the opposite effect.

I think you need to mature a lot more before even considering getting pregnant. As far as a doctor helping you, there is no reason to get a doctor involved.

Do you want to know why? Doctors do not even consider helping anybody with fertility until they have been trying for at least 2 years. That is right, 2 years of couple trying without success then they will consider doing tests, many couples tests come out fine or even told they can not have children and then they end up adopting a beautiful baby. You know what happens after. Thinking they can not get pregnant. Wooops they actually fallen pregnant thinking they are never going to have children.

I personally feel that your rushing into something that your not prepared for. It is not fair for you, your boyfriend or a baby at this time.

I am not judging you at all, but just laying out the facts. You need to make sure your future is secure with a job, with your partner and let everything else fall into place not when you think it is the right time but when the right time arrives without you forcing it there.

Best wishes and best of luck.

Joe

Please, please, please reconsider getting pregnant so young. You have another 20 years easy to have a baby. I had my second one at 35. Enjoy your youth! Sure, babies look so sweet and the clothes are cute, but they are also a lot of work and are very expensive.

If you are feeling the mothering urge, why not volunteer at your local Children's Hospital? They need volunteers to nurse and rock the babies. Many communities have a program called Infant Stim which is an early intervention program for kids with disabilities and they are always in need of volunteers.

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Originally Posted by MummaCrash

I was pregnant at 18 and my, 'partner', and I were financially stable.

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Understand that not every 18 year old is stable. Actually, in many places it is a rarety.

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Originally Posted by MummaCrash

Formula is not that expensive, either is diapers, baby food.

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I really don't know where you are, but here in the states it can run upwards of over $200 per month. Now, remember, that you don't know the condition of your baby prior to the birth. For example, my last one who is now 5, had a severe case of acid reflux and was on a formula that cost upwards of $300 per month, and it was not covered by insurance even though it was a prescription.

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Originally Posted by MummaCrash

Let us not generalise the minority of BAD YOUNG Mothers because these types of replies are warranted.:D

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I think you misunderstand what we are trying to say here. Children are EXPENSIVE!! We did not mention vaccinations, hospitalizations, doctor's visits, etc.

There are many young women who are capable of being a mother at such a young age, but there are many more who are not. A baby is not something that you can change your mind about when the going gets tough.