My friend laura is 15 and she is great fun but over the past year she has become like a slag I'm very worried for her as I don't want her 2 get a name for herself which is already happening she goes meeting different lads all the time and she keeps swopping boyfriends all the time when she goes out with a lad she flirts with his mates and she has slept with 3 lads unprotected. 1st time she slept with her boyfriends best mate in a tent on her period with no comdom. Second time with her boyfriend of a day. 3rd time with a lad who she only new his name and she slept with him on a field on her period with no comdom. She cheats on her boyfriends. When I talk to her about it she goes 'o it was just a mistake that was yesterday lets just forget it' but it happens again. I want to help her because she doesn't seem to realise that she will get a name for herself as well as the risk of being pregnant and sti's? What can I say to make her realise and help her?

I will tell you one thing, if you hang around with someone with that kind of reputation, what do yyou think your reputation will be?

I'm afraid you have to let her live her own life and make her own mistakes. You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped. Personally I don't think it is grounds to break up with her just remember you tried your best and any consequences are her own fault. You have said what you think and she probably knows your right but is ignoring it for any number of reasons- you're a good friend but don't let this drag you down.

If she ever tries to encourage you into any risky behaviour (drinking/drug taking) just politely decline and maybe then think about distancing yourself.

Remember - you always have to look after yourself first. Other people you can try and help but ultimately it is their own decisions however ill advised.

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Originally Posted by ellen-07

my friend laura is 15 and she is great fun but over the past year she has become like a slag im very worried for her as i dont want her 2 get a name for herself which is already happening she goes meeting different lads all the time and she keeps swopping boyfriends all the time when she goes out with a lad she flirts with his mates and she has slept with 3 lads unprotected. 1st time she slept with her boyfriends best mate in a tent on her period with no comdom. second time with her boyfriend of a day. 3rd time with a lad who she only new his name and she slept with him on a field on her period with no comdom. She cheats on her boyfriends. When I talk to her about it she goes 'o it was just a mistake that was yesterday lets just forget it' but it happens again. I want to help her because she doesnt seem to realise that she will get a name for herself as well as the risk of being pregnant and sti's? what can i say to make her realise and help her?

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It's her life, she has to do what she wants to do... her decisions, her reputation.
We all have to make our own mistakes and learn from it.

Having said that...
You have a choice: staying friends with her or distancing yourself and see her less.

Have you stopped to think for one second that this may be here say?
I remember when I was in high school, it was common knowledge that I slept with a guy in my class, after he had spread a rumour that I did... he was caught out when he realized that on the night I "slept" with him I was actually in hospital with my medical record to prove it.
People say things sometimes and sometimes you have to realize that some things you hear through the grapevine aren't true. How do you know about this, did she tell you herself or is it stuff you have heard?
If it is true, it sounds like you have tried to tell her what it is doing for her reputation.. if it was me I would be far more worried about other stuff such as STD`s, pregnancy.. compared to that reputation is nothing of importance.
Have you ever heard of tough love?. let her learn on her own, after all it is only a mistake if she thinks it herself.you can't live her life for her but you can certainly be there for her when it all goes wrong.
You sound like a good friend.

I think you've done everything a friend could do. Hand her some literature on STDs and step back.