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-   -   Should I text him later on (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=89191)

  • May 4, 2007, 11:15 AM
    sublime
    Should I text him later on
    This is my first time on the site but I have read some responses to other queries and there excellent so I hope you might be able to advise me on mine.

    I met a guy from my local area going back about a year ago. I called his business to obtain a quote on my house renovations. Towards the end of the conversation he asked me if I'd like to meet him for a drink that evening and I said yes. At the beginning I was very wary and thought he is a real charmer, however I couldn't have been more wrong. I have never got on so well with a guy, we connected from the very beginning and thoroughly enjoyed each others company, we actaully spent the whole wkd together doing fun things , it was genuinely lovely. He said he would ring me but he didn't and about a week later I rang him and came on a little heavy which I realise was so wrong of me to do, I was angry basically and he saw that of me, I feel really ashamed now of my behaviour. We lost touch and then about 5 months later he contacted me and asked how I was but I was going out with someone at the time and could not do that behind my boyfrind's back. My friends were telling me inform him to go away because he never rang and should not be in touch now and I listened to them to my biggest regret now because I do realise what an idiot I was. My other relationship did not work out because we were not compatible.

    I'm currently doing this course about self development and about accepting responsibility about errors that you have made and make amends with those you have hurt so a few days ago I got in touch with A and said I was sorry for saying what I said. He replied and texted "right so, what is the course you are doing about" I told him and he said "where i was doing it" I said where it was and he then asked "how i was" I replied fine thanks but I never asked how he was. I told him that there was genuinely no aganda behind this contact but just to say what I did and I mean that. He finally said "fair dues to you for doing this" and that was it no further contact. I realise now that I do want to see him and would like to make contact in a few months time and ask him out for a drink but what do you all think. There is a chance that he is happily with someone and if he is then fair enough but I would like to know. Maybe he has already said no by not asking to meet via the recent contact!
  • May 4, 2007, 11:28 AM
    ForeverZero
    You're overthinking this wayyy too much. Here's the deal. He's not looking into this as deeply as you are. I'm going to get very dangerous here, and tell you, being a woman is a benefit. Ever heard the word moody associated with women? Honestly, I've had girls chase me from one end of the planet to the other, only to turn around and act like they hate me and I'm the worst thing in the world, only to cry their eyes out when I leave. Trust me, any guy worth his salt knows women are unpredictable, or, in more polite, professional, proper terms, "complete lunatics".

    That being said, stop overthinking, and ask the dude out. What's the worst that happens? You're no worse off then than you are now.
  • May 4, 2007, 11:34 AM
    sublime
    Thank you for been upfront and just stating it the way it is.
  • May 4, 2007, 11:34 AM
    sublime
    I'm actually going to leave it for a while and contact him then but not at the minute.
  • May 4, 2007, 11:36 AM
    ForeverZero
    Two day rule doesn't apply to men.
  • May 4, 2007, 01:18 PM
    talaniman
    Call him and invite him out for a drink, why not?
  • May 4, 2007, 02:36 PM
    sublime
    Would you advise me to contact him a few weeks and see or contact him in a few days since I have apologised?
  • May 4, 2007, 02:41 PM
    sypher373
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by ForeverZero
    Two day rule doesn't apply to men.


    To be honest, his answer I'm will be the same no matter when you call... if you want to call, just do it :)
  • May 11, 2007, 11:47 AM
    sublime
    Hi everyone, relating to my query I'm still hesitating about asking A out for a drink because I told him in my text 2 weeks ago when I apologised about my behaviour that there was no agend behind the text which there wasn't at the time but I want to see him now. I'm kind of thinking that he will think my apology was insincere by sending another text. I'm sorry to be so annoing about this, but what do you think?
  • May 11, 2007, 12:20 PM
    InTheArmsOfGod
    The one with the obvious issue here is him. If you think he was insulted by your "attitude" towards him when you called, you couldn't be more wrong. There's two ways he could've taken it in my opinion. A. He could've liked the fact that you were angry with him or B. He could've genuinely not cared about it because he really didn't have any plans to call you back.

    He's the guy. He should be the one to initiate further contact in my opinion. Think about it though. He initiated the first contact with you by inviting you out, and all of a sudden he stopped. I don't know how you two really felt about one another, but I'm just assuming you both were on different wave lengths at the time by what you've written here. If he gave up on you after you called him, then he really wasn't fighting for anything to begin with. As a guy, I love it when girls get angry cause I didn't call them. Makes me know they're still interested. Apparently he doesn't feel the same way.

    Keep us posted on what you do, but my advice would be to move on.
  • May 11, 2007, 12:34 PM
    sublime
    No I genuinely believe he was going to call me back all right however he did take a long time to do this and I got impatient and had a go at him. We clicked and he was sussi g me out if I wanted to have a family, was I ambitious etc which I yes too however the family thing was down the road and not in the immediate term, whether he was thinking about this now I don't know. However I do agree with what you have said that it is usually best for the guy to ring but I would like to know if there is still anything there, possibly not however I won't know unless I try. 5 won't have failed if his reply is no to not meeting up because I will finally know the outcome and then can move on.
  • May 11, 2007, 12:44 PM
    sublime
    Well the text message went to him and if he doesn't reply or else says no then I have my answer and I can move on, thanks for your help.
  • May 11, 2007, 01:11 PM
    sublime
    Hi everyone, I got my reply and he said he was not interested because he is going out with someone now and is happy with her but he wished me well. I am so glad I contacted him because I got my answer and I won't wonder anymore. Thanks everyone.

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