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-   -   How Do You Deal With Pesky 'Cold Callers'? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=86828)

  • Apr 27, 2007, 02:11 AM
    Bluerose
    How Do You Deal With Pesky 'Cold Callers'?
    Found this on the net just had to share.

    The best way to get rid of pesky 'cold callers'.

    I’m Sorry, I Can’t Talk Right Now….I’m “Breastfeeding.”

    Who would have thought that breastfeeding would have so many advantages? And I’m not talking about the whole brain development thing. Yeah, that’s important, but everyone knows that breastfeeding is good for babies’ development. I’m talking about the lesser-known but equally wonderful advantages of breastfeeding. Like take this one for instance:

    Breastfeeding will fend off a phone solicitor faster than you can say “booby milk.”

    Let me explain. I can’t tell you how many times I sit down to dinner only to hear the phone ring. Yeah, I should ignore it, but I don’t. And then I regret it because it’s usually a phone solicitor trying to sell me a new mortgage or a fancy set of golf clubs or something else I completely don’t need. Now my problem is that I find it excrutiatingly painful to cut them off and just hang up. So I try any polite excuse to get them off the phone first - like I’m eating dinner right now, I can’t afford it, I don’t golf, etc. However, these excuses rarely work, and five minutes later my dinner is cold.

    Well, no longer! I have finally found the solution to ward off these pesky solicitors. Just tell ‘em you’re breastfeeding! You won’t believe how well it works. You’ll be amazed that they have no scripted retort, like “Well, you’re breasts will be there in 5 minutes, let me just tell you about this great time share deal…” But no! They’re actually speechless and can’t hang up the phone fast enough.

    Now, some of you may be thinking: But I don’t breastfeed! Well, the beauty of this tactic is that they can’t see you so it doesn’t matter. In fact, I’m rarely breastfeeding when I use the excuse! And if you’re a man, you can use a variation on it. Just say, “My wife is breastfeeding. I’m sorry we can’t talk right now.” You might think this won’t work because hey, why would your wife breastfeeding prevent you from talking on the phone. But my theory is that the mere mention of the word “breast” will throw them so off guard that they’ll have no choice but to hang up.

    This works equally well with door-to-door solicitors. I know because my husband has used it more than once. If there’s someone at the door that he doesn’t want to talk to he just says, “My wife is breastfeeding. Please respect our privacy.” Works like a charm! And again, the beauty of this is that you don’t really need a wife who’s breastfeeding. Heck, you don’t even need a wife! And if you’re a little older, just say that your daughter is breastfeeding. Feel free to try it sometime. I guarantee you it will work.


    Check it out, she's so funny.
    The Imperfect Blog - Parenting, Politics and News for the Perfectly Challenged
  • Apr 27, 2007, 02:16 AM
    curlybenswife
    Hehehehehehe would you like to borrow millie she just witters at them they soon go away :D
  • Apr 27, 2007, 02:21 AM
    Capuchin
    This is a big picture, I apologise. It's an anti-telemarketer script.

    http://www.xs4all.nl/~egbg/counterscript.gif
  • Apr 27, 2007, 02:27 AM
    Bluerose
    curlybenswife,

    I just found the site. It's funny. She has a blog there that would make you and me feel like we are perfect. She makes a list of the things she does to let you feel superior...

    Feeds vegetables to her kids... once a week if she's feeling lucky!

    What they had for tea last night... waffles and peanut butter!

    I'm sitting here on my own laughing my head off. Lol
  • Apr 27, 2007, 02:31 AM
    curlybenswife
    Ok I didn't notice the link I think I'm going blind in my old age ;) I could do with a giggle that's for sure xx
  • Apr 27, 2007, 02:37 AM
    Bluerose
    Capuchin,

    WOW! Big... But very funny.

    I'm one of these people who hate (and I don't like using that word) people who knock at my door and waffle on for 10 minutes before they get to what it is they want... Especially if they call at meal times. It must be the only time I am really rude to anyone. If my daughter is around at the time, she just cringes cause she knows what I'm like.

    Even those in the street. I just keep walking. I know they are only doing their job but I do not have to be a part of that job... Do I?

    Think I'll need to try something funny next time.
  • Apr 27, 2007, 02:40 AM
    Capuchin
    My friend used to have 2 front doors to his house. His dad would invite in the cold callers and keep them back for 30 minutes talking about all kinds of rubbish, not letting them sell their stuff.

    When they finally managed to get away from him, they would be glad that was over and go and knock on the next door down... only to be greeted by the same man again, pretending to never have seen them before and inviting them in again!

    Great way to give them a scare :D
  • Apr 27, 2007, 02:52 AM
    Bluerose
    Had to spread it……… But that's brilliant! Wish I had two doors. Lol

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