My ex and I had an off and on relationship that lasted about 4 years. To this day, I would marry her tomorrow if she'd say yes and she knows exactly how I feel about her. We called it quits for the last time in 2003. Since then we have spoken at most 5 times, always when something bad happened to her. In Nov. '06 she called to tell me that she was engaged. I tried to be happy for her but I still love her. I want her to be happy but I want to be that guy. We didn't speak again until April 07. When we talked, the conversation turned towards our past sex life and she wanted to meet. She said it was because we needed closure; that she doesn't want to end up having an affair months into her marriage. That last part might have been intended as a joke but still! Why would someone who's mere months away from getting married be talking about these things to her ex-boyfriend, whom she hasn't really spoken to over the past 4 years? What is she trying to do? Is she trying to make me jealous or hurt? Or is she looking for a way out of her engagement? What is she thinking?

Hi I think that maybe it is because she would obviously still have feelings for you and being that she is going to get married she is possibly having seccond thoughts. Knowing that there is still a possibility for a relationship between the two of you, she is clinging to this thought to give herself a way out of the relationship. She must have a problem with commitment. Just don't let yourself be used as her escape route.

It might be worth catching up to see what is really on her mind. She might be getting cold feet, she might be thinking about you, but either way if she wants out of her current relationship you should not be part of it. If she is then single again, you could try getting together again then.

Completely ignore her, and have nothing to do with her drama period. Why should you help her cheat and have a fling with this engaged person? Not healthy. Get over her quick, and move on. This could be you!!