I have been getting to know a lad for nearly a year now, and since around christmas I would say that it was slightly more serious, despite the fact we are not actually together! The other day we were talking about stuff, and he asked me the last time I had got in to anyone on a night out (jus kissin, as I am still a virgin) and I said well it was summer 2006, because I am not into going out and getting into strangers. He went a bit quiet and then I discovered someone who is jealous of us two had told him I had got into a stranger last week, so I sorted that out and told him it wasn't true. He never admitted the last time he got into someone, but he said its not his type of thing either and that he doesn't like pulling random girls. Last night my best mate was telling me that she had been talking to his cousin and whenever this guy I like goes and stays with his cousin (apparently they get up to allsorts, including random sex) when I discovered this I burst into tears. My friend thought I was mad because me and this lad aren't even together, but it still really upset me. I know have allsorts of things flying round my head. His cousins is obviously a bad influence, but then I think well do I need to stay clear of guys like that? Or could it just be a one off and I'm being stupid? But I have been trying to tell myself he does really like me and its not all about sex? But after hearing this it makes me wonder if he does only want me for sex? But then how does that explain waiting round for nearly a year for me? Please help!

Well. Obviously in your mind it is a relationship. In his mind it isn't.

You can either talk to him about becoming an exclusive relationship, or you can deal with your own thoughts and depends less on him.

It's up to you whether to steer clear or not.

I hope this helps a little.

This is the problem though, if anything it is him that thinks we are in a reltionship and not me. I try to make it clear we aren't because of difficulties such as my parents being strict (which is why its taking time) but after last night I just thought well if that's how he can behave then maybe he isn't boyfriend material, but I still like him deep down. I just wish I could step inside him and find out what he really wants from me! Thanks for your help!