Hi my name is Jess and I am 19.

I have been sexually active for 4 years now, and been with my b/f for the last 2 years and only one other guy before that. I have never had an orgasm, and am beginning to give up. Trust me my b/f has tried and yes I am still only young but I feel I am missing out.

Whilst having sex I get to a piont where it feels really good then it just stops, however to get to this piont I need to be simulating my citorus.

When my b/f give me oral it feels great and I get to this piont so much qiucker, and as some people describe it I feel like I need to urenate, but this sensation only occurs during oral.

I often masterbate but still only get to this piont, although I only stilumate my clitorus as this is what turns me on.

I have tried talking to a doctor about my problem but they were no help, they said I was only young and that I have plenty of time.

PLEASE HELP!!

When I see that title on a post I place a mental bet that the girl is under 25/26.

It is normal at your age to find an orgasm to be a challenge.

It is a mental hurdle as you get to know your body. Your doctor is right... It will "come"... Practice on your own and with a guy that really connects with you. Once your brain accepts that is is time to "let go" - it will - and you won't turn back... Enjoy.

**And not that you need to be told this - but there are other things in life just as important right now, which will make that orgasm all the better later - and that's called college and carrer planning... Orgasms are even sweeter when part of a great life.

I don’t think age should be a factor, maybe experience. However I feel completely comfortable with my partner and sex isn’t just about the physical connection for us but also the emotional connection which is so much more intense.

Thanks for your response Ash but just to let you know that having an orgasms isn’t on the top of my list, and I am second year psychology student and also work part-time, so I think that my career is pretty much on its way, I just need help with understanding how to ‘Let Go’ as people keep putting. As I’ve never experienced it I don’t know what to expect or if I’m supposed to be doing something I’m not.

I would say best way for a female to orgasm is through oral sex... No matter your age ;) I was your age when it occurred to me.

Just relax, don't put pressure on yourself and one day (very soon) it shall happen.

Good Luck

Glad to hear school is on track!

I guarantee you that it WILL happen... You will feel a shutter and a pleasant (mild to strong - they vary) contraction and a release and... and well, an interest in doing it again.
(If worse comes to worst, I'll talk you through it :-)

No worries... It happens in time... Age doesn't necessarily determine it, but stage of life does and frankly, it may be a good thing you still have something to look forward to!

I'm a guy so this is just my perspective from my experiences.

I've had a partner who never, ever had an orgasm with intercourse in the missionary position... with me or any other partner. She thought it felt good, but never got her there.

Another girl could almost always get to orgasm in the missionary with the guy raised up (not laying on her) but it required her or me to directly stim the cl!toris with wet fingers. Again, if we did this, she almost always came.

Another girl HATED direct stimulation with fingers.

My partner now favors her being on top for best chance. There's a few other positions I favor and that sometimes work for her, but only when she also self stimulates.

Part of the problem is what feels good to a guy isn't always what the girl needs. Many postitions don't naturally stimulate the cl!toris well enough, and some not at all.

So... id say, even knowing a partners desires really, really well, it still can be tough sometimes... and might take some help from your side. Don't be afraid to ask for what you want.

And if I had to get my partner off and guarantee I could do it, id probably, as mentioned, try oral. Not that it is a guarantee either... again, even knowing my partner very well she still needs to direct me some sinve sometimes she likes it softer and light and sometimes she wants more direct, hard pressure.

And also, she needs to be there mentally. If she cannot lose herself in the moment, it might never happen... even if she was aroused and interested.

So try a few positions (like you on top), don't be afraid to self stimulate with him inside you, and don't be afraid to ask for what you want.

Love and sex are closely related.If you are making love to someone you don't love or you are materialistic and money-minded you will never enjoy the sex.Your mind must combine with your body and soul to have orgasm.It just need concentration on both parties and making sure there is no rush and earlier penetration,since some males do ejaculate more faster while the lady is still to do so.Some girls are too shy to let the boy know that they have not ejaculated or reached at the point of orgasm.

Girls should therefore,try to ask their boys to do more romancing and massaging before the deal is done, since girls have a more high rate of sexual emotion and desires than boys.Please don't allow your boy to ejaculate before you do if he does then he looses sexual taste and cannot continue sweating on your body anymore.

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Originally Posted by chickyjaybabe

Hi my name is Jess and i am 19.

i have been sexually active for 4 years now, and been with my b/f for the last 2 years and only one other guy before that. I have never had an orgasm, and am begining to give up. Trust me my b/f has tried and yes i am still only young but i feel i am missing out.

Whilst having sex I get to a piont where it feels really good then it just stops, however to get to this piont i need to be simulating my citorus.

When my b/f give me oral it feels great and i get to this piont so much qiucker, and as some people discribe it i feel like i need to urenate, but this sensation only occurs during oral.

i often masterbate but still only get to this piont, although i only stilumate my clitorus as this is what turns me on.

I have tried talking to a doctor about my problem but they were no help, they said i was only young and that i have plenty of time.

PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I'm having the same problem and glad to see that there are others too.. thanks for the advice..

Im 40 and never had one through intercourse... neither has a friend of mine... I was told by a doctor that it's the men that don't know what they are doing but then again I still say it takes 2 and how do you think I FEEL at MY AGE that it never happened for me>? So sorry hun

Try toys! Certainly helped my ex have her first.

You'll learn... or maybe you'll have a boyfriend that can teach you. But guys that really know... rather than think they know are pretty rare.

Before me, my b/f had only been with three other girls, on a one off fling and only one of them had an orgasm. So I guess he too doesn't have experience, but trust me what he is doing feels right I just think I have a problem with relaxing and 'letting go'. ITS SO FRUSTRATING!!

JISER if your serous then hell that's what I WILL DO anyway :)

Chicky same here

JIPER - I do actally have a few toys, I really like those vibating ticklers but I'm not really into the dildo. Although I might have to get one of thoose G-Spot vibrators they sound good.

Thanks Everyone for your responses, I really appreciate it.

Jaxie - you say you have never had an orgasm through sex, and reading a few other posts of yours you say that you have had them, by yourself through self stimulation. I would be happy enough if I could even achieve that but I can't even give myself one. I think I'm just broken :P

You are NOT broken.
A woman's body is more complicated than a mans'.
And sometimes need more... time.

It's just tougher for some girls, but in time their body "gets it"...
I would be surprised if this is a lifelong issue. You just need to find your "trigger"
And go from there. You are YOUNG. Some girls are still virgins at your age.

So, relax.

Ps - you are in good shape? Work out?
Take care of your body and in time... voila. :-)

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Originally Posted by chickyjaybabe

Before me, my b/f had only been with three other girls, on a one off fling and only one of them had an orgasm. so i guess he too doesnt have experience, but trust me what he is doing feels right i just think i have a problem with relaxing and 'letting go'. ITS SO FRUSTRATING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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He might be lucky enough to be in the same movie theater, but if he doesn't know what film to go to then he's just not going to meet you there.

Plus if you stress about it too much then its not going to come even if he did happen to stumble into the right movie. With women its almost as much mental as it is physical.

I once got a woman off without touching her in either the genital or breast area.. And she said she had never had such an orgasm before. So that will show you its possible.

You get this really good feeling then contractions of the vagina and surrounding areas. Now if i could only find a guy to do it through intercourse,oh well

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Originally Posted by yougotit

I'm having the exact same problem and glad to see that there are others too.. thanks for the advice.. !

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YEA me two its good to know that I'm not alone