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-   -   Is he ignoring me? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=85331)

  • Apr 23, 2007, 05:13 AM
    maka
    Is he ignoring me?
    A few months back I started seeing someone occasionally. This person sent me many emails suggesting to have a "fling". But the condition was that this person not "hate" me once we were done and that we remain the friends we were. The person agreed. Now that it's over, this person seems to be ignoring me. This person will not send me emails asking how I am doing, making me think that this person does not want to even be friends like before. I sent this person an email recently asking if I had to go see him/her just to hear a friendly "hi". He/She returned my email finally asking me how I was. How lame is that? He/she also suggested that I can call anytime. I don't want this person to think I am running after them... and I don't want to feel like I am. I just hate losing good friends, which is what we were. What do I do? Ignore him/her back?
  • Apr 23, 2007, 05:22 AM
    talaniman
    Leave them alone, the fling is over. They have other things to do, and so should you. And what's with the him/her stuff? Either its one or another usually.
  • Apr 23, 2007, 05:25 AM
    tickle
    He/she/him/her didn't want any strings attached to the 'fling', other party agreed. Now its over leave it alone and move on.
  • Apr 23, 2007, 06:08 AM
    maka
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by talaniman
    Leave them alone, the fling is over. They have other things to do, and so should you. And whats with the him/her stuff? Either its one or another usually.
    I never asked for the fling to continue... you're ridiculous... not much of an expert talaniman
  • Apr 23, 2007, 06:11 AM
    maka
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by tickle
    he/she/him/her didnt want any strings attached to the 'fling', other party agreed. Now its over leave it alone and move on.
    Neither of us wanted any strings...
  • Apr 23, 2007, 06:14 AM
    Capuchin
    Well, I am taking a wild guess that he is a he.

    Some guys will tell you anything to get in your pants. If that anything is "sure we'll be friends afterwards" then so be it. To him, it was just a fling. With NO friendship.

    He doesn't hate you, he's completely indifferent. You're a bother to him with all these emails and attempts at contact.

    It's over now. Move on.

    If it's a girl, then I'm a little more surprised.. but it doesn't change what I'm saying.
  • Apr 23, 2007, 06:36 AM
    maka
    This is what I needed to hear... thank you Capuchin
  • Apr 23, 2007, 06:43 AM
    maka
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by maka
    I never asked for the fling to continue...you're ridiculous....not much of an expert talaniman
    Finally... thank you T
  • Apr 23, 2007, 08:50 AM
    diya
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by maka
    I never asked for the fling to continue...you're ridiculous....not much of an expert talaniman
    Absolutely... u'll get nothing but hurt and sleepless nights wondering when he would call... do u really want to lose your sleep over someone who's acting like a piece of selfish mortal... uh!
  • Apr 23, 2007, 09:18 AM
    maka
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by diya
    Absolutely...u'll get nothing but hurt and sleepless nights wondering when he would call...do u really want to lose your sleep over someone who's acting like a piece of selfish mortal...uh!
    Actually Diya, I never lost sleep over this... and never wonder when he will call, I never gave him my number... all he has is my email address, he's the one who gave me a number to reach him... I don't know why I even bother to try and keep in touch with him... Capuchin is right... he wanted me for one thing - got it - and blew off with no regard for what we agreed upon... and yes... that is selfish... thank you for your input diya, I appreciate it
  • Apr 23, 2007, 01:24 PM
    diya
    Can anyone tell me what is the male psyche behind what tal wrote: He is through with you and doesn't need your friendship since he got what he wanted... why can't guys remain friends and keep getting what they want from the same girl? Can anyone please tell me... I think lot of women would be willing to know...
  • Apr 23, 2007, 01:52 PM
    Capuchin
    Like males in any species, there is one way to ensure the success of your genetic line: spread your seed as wide as possible.

    Sorry but it's true and always will be true, men are programmed this way by nature.
  • Apr 23, 2007, 02:24 PM
    diya
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Capuchin
    Like males in any species, there is one way to ensure the success of your genetic line: spread your seed as wide as possible.

    Sorry but it's true and always will be true, men are programmed this way by nature.
    Yes.. I guess so... thanks for your input
  • Apr 23, 2007, 02:24 PM
    maka
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Capuchin
    Like males in any species, there is one way to ensure the success of your genetic line: spread your seed as wide as possible.

    Sorry but it's true and always will be true, men are programmed this way by nature.
    That is only true if we're talking about procreation Cap... the only thing that is true as far as I'm concerned and I'm sur Diya will agree... is that men are pigs... lol... Sorry, but it's true and always will be true....men are programmed this way by nature...:D
  • Apr 23, 2007, 02:26 PM
    diya
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by maka
    That is only true if we're talking about procreation Cap....the only thing that is true as far as i'm concerned and i'm sur Diya will agree...is that men are pigs...lol....Sorry, but it's true and always will be true....men are programmed this way by nature...:D
    Lol... true dear
  • Apr 23, 2007, 03:05 PM
    tickle
    I think the terminology is 'friends with benefits' and once that is established between two people then everything is comfortable and copacetic. The problem is some of us just can't accept that kind of relationship and eventually want more out of it.

    It doesn't mean men are pigs. So you can flip the coin over and say women are sl***ts then.

    Making a general statement isn't fair IMO

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