Ask Me Help Desk - Our nightmare

My live in boyfriend and I, both who are young professionals, who have never been in trouble before... have created our own little nightmare and now I need help...

The other night we got into an argument and things got very heated. We slapped each other and the police were called. I was arrested, despite his refusal to press charges and pleas for the police not to take me, and charged with domestic violence.

I was released and told not to have contact with him or go back to our home, however he had been trying to get in touch with me since before I was even released from the detention center. He was contacting me... and I responded to him and have talked to him on multiple occasions since(it's only been 1 day). Neither of us are threat to each other... it was a stupid incident that got out of control... and he has asked me to come back home. The court date isn't for 2 more weeks... and he is refusing to file charges. He was told by the officers that the charges would be dropped if he didn't.

First... is that true? Second, if it is dismissed, will I now have a record?

Well.. he wants me to come home... and I also want to go home. Can I get in trouble for talking with him since he contacted me? What can we do? Please help!!

In some states like Ohio the officer can sign on the victim's behalf even if the victim refuses. It is then up to the prosecutor to keep going with the charges. Most prosecutors will dismiss if both parties agree and they do not see a pattern. If the charges are dropped it will still show on your record but it will list that the charges were dropped. You might be able to get your record sealed if you are concerned about that. As far as going home if there is no protection order then you should be OK. A judge can order no contact however its up to the judge to enforce that. An officer can not enforce a no contact order only the protection orders. If the prosecutor does not want to dismiss the charges see if they are willing to pled them down to a lesser charge like disorderly conduct.

Quote:

Originally Posted by lulubelle07

my live in boyfriend and I, both who are young professionals, who have never been in trouble before... have created our own little nightmare and now I need help...

The other night we got into an argument and things got very heated. We slapped each other and the police were called. I was arrested, despite his refusal to press charges and pleas for the police not to take me, and charged with domestic violence.

I was released and told not to have contact with him or go back to our home, however he had been trying to get in touch with me since before I was even released from the detention center. He was contacting me...and I responded to him and have talked to him on multiple occasions since(it's only been 1 day). Neither of us are threat to each other...it was a stupid incident that got out of control...and he has asked me to come back home. The court date isn't for 2 more weeks....and he is refusing to file charges. He was told by the officers that the charges would be dropped if he didn't.

First...is that true? Second, if it is dismissed, will I now have a record?

Well..he wants me to come home...and I also want to go home. Can I get in trouble for talking with him since he contacted me? What can we do?? Please help!!!

Please do not go back yet... stay at a relatives if you can... talk to your elders whom might have been in a bad relationship, like a counselor first, because all bad relationships start with only a simple "little slap" and then escalade, and we don't even know what did hit us... no pun intended. I had too awful marriages that were so wonderful at first, then a small argument, then verbal abuse, then it just kept on and on. I would always say I had to go back to make it better without knowing about life, and it never worked. Talking just made it worse. Yet I hope that you can talk to a counselor with your guy with you, if he cannot do this for you, be assured this man is not for you. It takes two to want to, and a lot of men say they will then don't, and get more angry when you pressure. This is why a third party is best if you really want to make sure you never "get heated up" again. I wish you all the help on this one you can get, it is never easy going it alone because you think you know the other person better... please stay safe for now... the police know why they are keeping you apart for now to cool down Peace

Billy Dymond, if you are an FBI agent why does it say in your profile:

Quote:

First Name:
Billy Last Name:
Dymond Location:
Long Island, New York Experience:
I know a lot about Middle school dating, both about girls and boys, and can give expert advise, I am in high school, and my girlfriend even helps out on her own profile on here to give boys and girls advise with dating in middle school, also since I was in 7th grade, I had always received a 90 or higher on my overall average for math, and I just ended school last week and I received a 98 for the year in algerbra II. Occupation:
Construction