I received a 401k plan in a previous marriage via a qualified domestic order. My adult daughter was listed as beneficiary on the plan. I remarried but left my daughter as beneficiary intending the plan to go to her at my death. While inquiring about the plan today I was told that remarriage completely voided my daughter as beneficiary and all funds will pass to my new spouse. I was told he will have to approve any attempt to list my children on the plan. He would not approve even though we have been married only two years and he has a sizeable 401k himself. Please offer any suggestions to help me with this issue. Thank you

That does not sound right, even in a community property state. The 401K money belongs to you and only you, and YOU decide who the beneficiary is.

You may need to contact an attorney who specializes in pension law.

Unfortunately whoever you talked to is correct. From 401khelpcenter.com - Naming a Beneficiary In Your 401k :

"If you are married, federal law says your spouse is automatically the beneficiary of your 401k or other pension plan - period. You should still fill out the beneficiary form with your spouse's name, for the record.

If you want to name a beneficiary who is someone other than your spouse, your spouse must sign a waiver. The waiver MUST be in writing"