This guy has a girlfriend... I have always been known to be quite shy and reserved... All I know is I really really love this guy truly wholeheartedly... I see everything in him and I just love everything about him and I gain great satisfaction when I see great things falling upon him.. This guy is well-known to be really nice and decent.. But his girlfriend(I don't know her) is a non-virgin though very beautiful.. I cried for many nights together before I actually hinted to him that I love him.. It was true eye contact... It was not long before he reciprocated... We don't speak to each other but somehow there is a strong bond,chemistry and eye contact that keep us 'going together'.it has already been a year... he knows I love him a lot.. I know he loves me... I don't expect him to leave the other girl,I know he is too decent to dump her just like that... I am somehow just curious.. have I done wrong in the first place.. was it wrong that I hinted to him initially that I loved him though he had a girlfriend.. was it wrong for him to have reciprocated.. I was too blind earlier as I really loved him to bits and that we had known each other for many years together(same class)... while this girl only came this year... in one month's time we are not going to see each other(the last year of university)... would it be wrong or weird if I go up and hand him a letter.. on how much he meant to me and that I wish him all the best in his life.. is it wrong/silly for me to give him a letter since he has a girlfriend... did I do wrong right from the start... this is really bugging me because I loved and still love him to bits... he had been really nice to me... as in went I went through a down period.. he was there for me again through eye contact and sincere smiles to cheer me up...
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If you say he is so decent then you know he was reciprocate if you write him a letter, so what is the point really?

No you did nothing wrong it is your feelings you cannot stop them at all and if he feels for you there is nothing he can do about it, but as you said he is a decent guy so just dumping someone is hurtfull, if you both love each other then I am sure things will work out for you both, I think giving him a letter about how much you love him might be a bit far as it could cause arguments within his relationship, but don't fret love is a very powerful emotion and it will pull you both together just have patience and you will be together.

No,you see if I give him a letter,it would be just between the both of us... His girlfriend wouldn't come to know... But,the thing is would I sound desperate or push him further away?. The thing is I might not be able to see him again in my entire life other than the 1 more month left... and there has been no words spoken by the way the both of us,. I am afraid I might regret because if we leave w just like that,its like there had been nothing between us.. not a word,not a letter... so do you think it would be wise for me 2 give him the letter... or am I spoiling the special chemistry/bond between us or in fact proving myself desperate resulting in him loving me less?

If it is the last time I think it would be good in that situation if it is only between the 2 of you wouldent you be able to get his nomber or something to keep in touch, just to keep the connection and spark alive, if you don't mind me asking why can you never see him again.

He doesn't seem as decent as you think he is...

Why do you say he does not seem as decent... or sometimes I wonder if it is ne who is not decent letting him know my feelings after he committed with another girl.. actually my problem is I still feel the pain whenever I see them together because I can never be sure if he really loves me... how am I to be sure since we don't speak.. all I could say is he does continues to give hints...

If you cared about him, and not your own feelings, you would have kept this to yourself, and not tried to come between him and his g/f. He is out of bounds. If he was the wonderful person you think he is, then he would have told you to back off and not continue to give you hints. Leave this alone before it gets out of hand and everyone is miserable. You cannot control who you love, but you can control what you do about it. No excuses.

Can I just know... now that I won't be seeing him anymore,. for the one last time.. would it be more appropriate for me to go up to him and say a few words or just hand him a brief letter?.

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Originally Posted by carnation

can i just know...now that i wont be seeing him anymore,..for the one last time..would it be more appropriate for me to go up to him and say a few words or just hand him a brief letter?...

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NEITHER IS APPROPRIATE!! Anything you do would be disrespectful and in very poor taste in my opinion, as this should never have gotten started in the first place. What is appropriate at this point is to let it die unsaid.

Thanks for your advive... I shall not take a further step by going up to him.. All my life I gain great satisfaction and happiness doing things the right way just like I saw god in this great gut I knew for more than 10 years... Now that I am ending things,I just need to know a feew things.. Were we actually considered to be in a relationship for this past 1 year?Secondly,did I do wrong initially by kind of looking him in the eye from a distance... at that time I did not know what I wanted.. all I knew is I loved him and I just needed him to know... I did not like prepare to give him hints... an undying spirit of love pushed me to do all what I did... did I do wrong?. were we considered to be in a relationship?.

I think you were smitten and flirty but you can't call it a relationship from what you wrote. How can it be if he had a g/f?