Muslim man is allowed to marry more than more women of course in a state like India it will not at all be an arrange marriage (the second marriage) no parent will allow their son until and unless a situation like infertility of his first wife . It will be a marriage in which he is attracted by and the girl also so it will be considered a love marriage . So why boys are allowed to do such a marriage and a female is not even allows to marry only one man of her own choice

Because Islam is a regimented "religion". Woman have little say, unfortunately. In Pakistan, they just recently said it would be OK to "Beat your wife lightly". Great consolation isn't it?

This is happening less and less in the cities and among educated people with good careers. Try to get away from it if you can!
Women have been treated as property for thousands of years, and were meant to stay home to raise children and take care of parents.
You need to decide whether or not you want to be a part of all that or not.

It is the rules of their religion. It is what they believe God allows. Even the parents restricting it, would not be looking at the allowances as the religion allows, but applying society rules.

It is not allowed, since it is not the women;s place to do so.

Because Islam is a paternalistic religion which does not recognize the rights of women and views them as the property of men. Unless they are serving their father, husband, uncle or some other male relatives, women are not perceived to have value, certainly not on their own. It is quite interesting that in faiths that allow for plural marriage partners, they all permit extra wives, not extra husbands. The idea of getting permission from male relatives to marry a particular person, this was traditional in the history of most faiths, but most religions have modernized and eliminated the tradition to permit women to marry the person of their choosing. Often in past times, and in some countries today, the only way for a family to improve their social and economic standing was to join with families who offered them some advantage via marriage. So maybe they are blessed with a beautiful daughter who will catch the eye of a richer and more socially advanced family as a potential wife for their son. She marries him and her whole family is elevated by association. Marriage was considered a business transaction more than a romantic situation and the idea was that people can fall in love in time if they are well matched. Love was less important than survival and making the family look good.

Quote:

---

So why boys are allowed to do such a marriage and a female is not even allows to marry only one man of her own choice

---

Because of your beliefs.

This is not the way most of the world works. You're Muslim, and that's the way your religion works. In the eyes of your religion women have no say at all. They are not people, they are property. A man can claim you committed adultery and you can be stoned to death just because he said you did it, even without proof! He can beat you, he can divorce you without any fuss at all. You are not a person, you're just a woman. You do what you're told and have no rights at all.

There are other religions that have the same rules. Most of the world does not believe what you do. Seems like even you don't believe what you do. Most of the world marries for love, and women have equal rights to men. I much prefer that. I wouldn't last a second as a Muslim woman, I'm way too strong minded for all that.

Having said that... what choice do you have? Unless you live in a country where you have rights, you have no choice at all. You could be killed for going against your families or husbands wishes.

All I can do is pity you and wish you the best.

Islam is practiced by more than a billion people across the world, and even in India there are many sects that adhere to local customs, and traditions, and just as many who do not go in for the multiple wives thing, or the arrange marriages. Thinking that there is one way any religion is practiced is a mistake, and far from the truth.

Even in America, some Christians believe and practice having multiple wives, while having multiple husbands is forbidden, so why is this just an Islamic thing? Suppression of women is also a practice found throughout the civilized world, and not limited to just Islam, so let's get about the reality of many societies, and cultures, and countries are patriarchal in structure, and not limit ourselves to just the religious factor.

LOL, you think a poor or financially less well off Islamic man has the option of a second wife? Do you think a strong willed Islamic female would go for that no matter the man thinking he is "entitled" to it?

There is no hard and fast rule how religion is practiced, and varies more by culture, class, caste, or sect than you can believe.

In state like India, because its mostly Hindu dominated culture so even though you are Muslim, a man won't get to have second marriage, unless parent agrees, or as you said the infertility of the first wife. But even though women can file a case against this in the court . But not sure if they will get the justice. But there is one thing that could happen, during 'Nikah' the groom promises some amount of money or property etc in some custom (don't remember the exact word for that ceremony). So, if you don't want to accept the second wife and instead choose to live alone or 'Talaq'. A women can go for that. But still not sure if parents will allow to do so. :(

Hello Talaniman,

You stated very well hopefully that will help, It will not let me gave a grenney that you deserve, for further information Musk please find a knowledgeable Imam that will explain the verses from Quran regarding the women, Islam is not harsh religion as some people thinks, it is the people how they use it, Thanks.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by afaroo

Hello Talaniman,

You stated very well hopefully that will help, It will not let me gave a grenney that you deserve, for further information Musk please find a knowledgeable Imam that will explain the verses from Quran regarding the women, Islam is not harsh religion as some people thinks, it is the people how they use it, Thanks.

---

So women and men are free to marry whoever they want and not forced to marry who their parents choose? And women area equal to men in every way?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Alty

So women and men are free to marry whoever they want and not forced to marry who their parents choose? And women area equal to men in every way?

---

Like afaroo said, "it is the people and how they use it." It depends on which understanding/interpretation of Islam someone is part of. It's like Christianity -- can be interpreted very literally and orthodox, be conservative, be middle of the road, or be liberal.