My boyfriend and I have a room-mate. We all moved into our home at the same time. The roommate is not on the lease. My boyfriend took him in because the guy has had a rather large streak of bad luck; however the condition was that he must get himself established so that he can move out on his own. I have no objection to helping someone who is in need. Our room-mate however, had a job for a month at a pizza parlor then lost it because he didn’t show up. When he was working he did pay some rent, but not the amount that was expected from him. He receives food assistance from the government but he blows it on expensive food then expects us to feed him the rest of the month. If he does have money he blows it at the bar or on one of his internet “hoes” rather than buying things to contribute to the house like laundry detergent trash bags (stuff that he uses but doesn’t pay for). He leaves a trail where ever he goes. If our room mate has been in a room there is a mess to prove it. He has done a minor amount of property damage since we moved there. One door is obliterated because of him and another isn’t quite functional. He basically sits on the computer trying to hook up with women all day. I have warned him that if doesn’t want to pay then he needs to at least clean up after himself and if he does a little extra it will be considered greatly, but he doesn’t even do the least. I can't clean the house with out cleaning up after him. I am pregnant and on restriction. He will eventually be kicked out anyway because I won’t tolerate him living here once my baby is born. I haven’t mentioned that he invites random women off the internet to come over to the house, which I consider very unsafe. I am at my ends whit. My boyfriend has given me the go ahead to kick him out if need be. The only thing that stops me is that I suffer from a moral dilemma. If I kick him out he will eventually be homeless. He may find a random woman to stay with, but like me she will grow tired of his antics and kick him out just as I would, which was his way of living for about six months before we gave him a place to stay. Personally I don’t believe in helping those who do not help themselves and I am completely against a free ride. I want other’s opinions on what action I should take. Right now all he has to do is leave one more thing lying around or ruin one more of my dishes and that’s all it will take for me. His presence stresses me out a lot and I don’t think that is healthy for me. In case I haven’t been clear, the guy has been warned both verbally and given a written notice. What should I do?

I see no moral dilemma at all -- he`s a bum -- kick his butt to the curb -- Loved your lead in line -- catches the eye -- smart lady lol -- Savage

You'd be doing him a favor to kick him out. The sooner he has to live with the consequences of his foolishness, the sooner he'll wise up.

Check first with your local police to find out if there's any reason at all why you can't put his stuff outside and change the locks. If that is not legal, begin legal eviction proceedings immediately so that, a month from now, you can do just that - literally put his stuff on the curb and change the locks.

Can you please tell me what happened. I have the same dilemma. Did you get him out?

He is not on the lease.

Your boyfriend agrees that he should leave if it would be too much for you.

You are pregnant.
And it is -understandably so- getting too much for you.

I would not think twice.
So you are in fact a very good person wiith a big heart to have allowed this situation for so long... you have given somebody opportunities.

At some point it's time to move on for that person.

He is not on the lease.
Don't feel bad.
You have a baby on the way... you need to prepare yourself for that.
In peace.



Good luck !

I love the title of your post. Very good.

Kick him out! Your doing him a favour!

The isn't a case of - he had a bad luck streak... he's just a bad seed. Feeling sorry for someone who is irresponsible enables them to continue to be irresponsible. Throw him out.

I would agree, I would normally say to give him 2 or 3 weeks to get a job, pay you a certain amount per week in full and clean up after himself and be clear there is no more leeway.

But really, he doesn't seem like the type who would do this. He seems to just want to have fun and act like your home is a dorm room. Kick him out this week, I'm sure he has friends or family members he can go stay with, you can't really be his only option for housing.