What can I do?

Please give us more details.

Move

Turn in your mother card.

Go on mother strike.

I hope these are helpful with the amount of information you gave us.

I didn't respect my mother when I was 20, 30, 40, 50... or ever. She ordered me around like a child. Or tried to - I lived far, far away and only went home once a year, until she was very old and needed help. I helped, sigh, because my dad needed help too.

I suspect the ability to communicate is one of the problems.

You have to provide more information/history/recent background/examples, etc. in order for anyone to make an educated response to your question.

She is an adult and so are you so leave her alone until she learns respect.