I've been friends for this guy about four months. I see him a lot because we are involved in a lot of the same school activities and have one class together. My friends have been saying from what they've seen he has a HUGE crush on me. But the thing is he's really a flirt and a jerk. Just recently he told me he thought I was pretty, cute, and really attractive and he liked me. I told him I liked him too. He can't talk well in person and won't text me anymore. Then he told me he likes three girls and I am one of them. He said he doesn't want to get in a relationship with me, because he doesn't want to ruin our friendship and somebody always gets hurt. Now I don't like him anymore because I have heard the things he has done and he is a big jerk. I also don't want to be one of the THREE girls he likes, and have to try to "win him over". Do you think he actually likes me? Should I tell him I don't have feelings for him anymore? I'm really confused :/

You already know the answer to this, he's a flirt and a jerk in your own words. If you HAVE to win him over because he prefers playing the field... he's not worth having in the first place.

You aren't going to change him... and he's already told you where you stand. Either be happy being one of four... or gather up your self respect and dignity and find someone else who wants you for you.

He was honest with you about liking a few other girls as well and not wanting to be in a relationship. Nothing wrong with that at all. That is what you are SUPPOSE to do in your teen years! Get to know different people to learn what you want and don't want in a relationship. At some point, there may be one person that stands out that you want to get to know even more and then you go on a couple of dates and perhaps get into an exclusive relationship with them, or decide that they aren't what you are really interested in.

If you want to be the only girl someone is interested in, then you will have to move on. If he's a nice guy as a friend, then be friends with him. Since you have heard things to make you feel that he is a big jerk, then you wouldn't want to be a girlfriend to him anyway.

He told you he doesn't want to date you because he doesn't want to lose your friendship. That doesn't make him a jerk, that makes him honest.

Sounds to me like you're both young teens. This is what teens do. They fall in and out of love at the drop of a hat. One day they can't live without the girl or guy they're fixated on. The next day they're in love with someone else.

Sounds like you enjoyed his friendship before your friends started putting ideas of romance into your head. Why not continue to be just friends?

Flirt and a jerk = superficial, as opposed to straightforward on a deeper level. Most teens aren't very good yet at showing true feelings because it is easy to get hurt. This is what you have to expect as you go through the agonies of learning about love relationships. Many of us never really learn very well! You sound OK to me - you can express yourself.
Don't dwell on his stupid 'like' of 3 girls. What does that mean anyway? Just say that you like many boys, but just as good friends, because you aren't ready for a steady bf. You don't want to be someone who thinks everyone else holds all the cards, and you are waiting for them to decide. Many of us did that as teens. Start thinking in terms of what you want. You don't want to be one of 3, so say so! Tell him to not ever count on being anything more than a friend. And if someone drops you, so be it, and move on.

Sounds like he is a honest person with you.

And it also sounds like you are fairly young, But dating 3 people is not really a bad thing. In fact I think young people should date many people and get a idea about them before they pick one to be with more serious.

This is what real dating was suppose to be. Not become serious in two week or 4 week like we often read here.

If you like him, be his friend and be around him and see what happens

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by diamondairmax

Should I tell him I don't have feelings for him anymore?

---

He has already said he does not have feelings for you.

Quote:

---

He said he doesn't want to get in a relationship with me

---

If you want to argue the point, chances are very slim he will develop feelings for you during the argument. Would the attention you get from others after causing that scene be worth chasing him away permanently? It's your choice.

Just don't date him. He is not sure what he wants so he can't have you. I can't know if he is a jerk, but he isn't ready to date in a mature way, so respect that and maintain distance.