Never posted a blog before but I have a lot on my mind so I kind of have to. Don't care to use proper puncuation so please forgive.
Life has its ups and downs but the way it balances out has really got me messed up me and my ex girl broke up after a 2 year relationship in which I helped her raise her son when I met her he was 1 our relationship ended when he was almost 4 we had a pretty good relationship we learned a lot from each other it was the kind of relationship that saved both of our lifes we needed each other as well as wanted each other the only down fall to that relationship was that we were 5 years apart but to me that didn't matter much we went through so much bull and still loved each other I understood her tried to help and encourage her but that got old during the last few months of our relationship I started to get too stressed out because I didn't get time to myself to I decided to move out that's when my life hit the brick wall
You see my ex comes from a hard child hood and has parents that are very judgemental towards those who are "Not" with the lord.Her other problem comes from her "baby daddy" who has been a lame guy probably his whole life he has never been there for his son or for her he's walked out on her twice the first was when he found out she was pregnant the second was when his son was born before I continue with this let me post his stats for you guys
His age25 has no job,has no car, has no phone, lives at home with his mother, and has a heroin problem.
Now tell me if that sounds attractive?no? I didn't think so either but yet 3 days after we "break up" he is back in her life after not being there 2yrs saying that he has "changed" what do you guys think of this? Probably the same way I do HELL ING NO HE Hasn't but that's what's most interesting about the situation she falls for it a Third time and tells me that she has fellings for him! Now I know what your thinking all women have fellings for their baby daddy yada yada yada... but not in this case he has done some ultra grimmy to her and her son yet she is talking about dating him as of the same month we broke the 2yrs now how the does that happen! The reason being her ing parents! They didn't like me because I wasn't a christian which is very judgemental the funny thing is I've helped her become the best person she has ever been and I made sure her son was well taking care of he went from this baby that doesn't smile to this beautiful laughing and smiling child all because he received both of our love. A lot of people question me asking how could you take care of another mans baby? My reply was always "he is like my son" that is the hardest part of what I'm am feeling the reason being I feel like I have lost my son this ing guy doesn't deserve to be around this beautiful child to poison his life and my ex's because people we all now how this type of goes down he comes into their lives for a 3rd time and S it all up why does he? Because it is his destiny to up in life some people just have that way
Back to the story, so she tells me that she went to church with him and they had dinner with her family they asked him what have you been up to? He responds I just got out of jail so your all thinking what I'm thinking right? That her parent are going to dislike him a whole lot more that me right? Wrong they love him and even tell my ex the should be together!! All because he is working on being a christain!! Now I have had my heart broken but god damn! This is outrageous! How the am I supposed to believe in a greater being if like this happens in my Face! This lame guy really has her mind ed! Does anyone understand this? Should I be mad she moved on so fast? That she didn't even wait to see what happens with us? That she told me she loved me and that she can't be without me but 3 days after we separate she ing does some like this!! And the bad thing about this whole situation is her parent allow her to make bad decisions because they are rich and she will probably never have to work and what is this guy going to do leech of course! He's going to suck the life out her with his tired game why does it hurt me so much? Because during the 3 days after we broke up I realized that I loved her and her son more than anything in the world and now I will never be able to do anything about it and the stupid ing thing about it is the motherer has a girlfriend still!! So we all know she is going to get played and that's what hurts me the most because she has talked down on him to everyone who has ever known her and now she become the biggest ing hipocrate in the history of the in united states you all know I want to beat that guy up because he has ed my life up and the funny thing is he does not look even close as good as me and that's coming straight from her mouth and all her friends so why would somebody still chose him even when I told her I wanted to work it out? Show me some love people give some feedback. What are her true colors?and why does she choose him over me? And how do I cope with all this pain its more than I can handle

My heart goes out to you. You're in a lot of pain right now due to this breakup and the rejection. It's obvious that you love your ex-girlfriend's little boy and feel like he's your son. It's also obvious that you love her.

But that she's a grown woman and she'd rather be with her baby's father although he has a drug problem, and no job, no car, no phone, no prospects, etc. You cannot force a grown woman to do what is right. You cannot force her to do what is best for herself and her child. If she has a pattern of breaking up and getting back with this jailbird, I think you're better off without her.

There's no point in wondering why she chose him. I have absolutely no idea except that she wants to be with the father of the baby. Seems like she thinks that being with a bad biological father is better than being with a good father figure. And if she has her parents' stamp of approval, that makes things tougher.

You need to heal from this blow. It will take time. You're going to be in pain. There's no doubt about it. Your strong connection to the baby is going to be with you for quite some time.

Don't let this situation infect your view of love and women and relationships. There is a sweet, intelligent, beautiful woman out there for you. She's searching for you right at this moment and you will find her when you've healed and you're ready. Don't take out this heartache and pain on her.

Take good care of yourself. Do the things you love to do and do some service for people in unfortunate situations.

There is a lot we cannot control in this world and your situation is a prime example of this fact. You gave your heart and soul but she made a decision and you may not agree with it but you have to live with it. We're not given more than we can handle. I promise you'll get through this. If you pray or believe in a Higher Power, I'd reach out at this time. It will help you ease your pain. If not, maybe you could meditate, work out, listen to music, visit friends, volunteer at a shelter, etc.