Ask Me Help Desk - Relationship desolved

Hi All,

I Need Some Help As To How To Overcome The Pain Of A Relationship Breakup. My Ex And I Were Together For 6 Years During Which Time, There Were Other People In The Mix (dating Others). I Was Told To Go Home And He Would Come Over Howeve, He Never Showed Up. He Would Not Go Out Anywhere With Me For Several Months Only To Return And Say "i"m Back" And Because I Was So In Love I Would Take Him Back. Recently, I Caught Him At The Airport Picking Up His Next Victim Which Tore My Heart In Half. I Decided To Take Him Back His Belongings That Were At My House ,change My Phone Number And End The Relationship However, He Came To My Job And Maitains To This Day That He Did Not Do Andything Wrong And How Can I Just Walk Away From A Six Year Relationship Without Going Through The Process With Him? I Am In Soooooooo Much Pain Over This Break-up What Can I Do To Ease The Pain?

I'd recommend making a list of things that you want to do in the short term only. Hang that list up so that you see it when you go to sleep and when you wake up and start working on those things. The more you focus on those things the better you'll start to feel and less you'll think of the ex.

I also recommend that if you don't have a gym membership you get one. Working out is a great way to get out of the house but also make yourself feel better. Get on a elliptical or stairmaster and just go for 10 or 15 minutes. Get off and rest and then do it again for another 10 or 15 minutes. I promise you, you won't be thinking about anything else other than what your doing. Plus it's healthy for you. Even if you don't get a gym membership take a walk, and go for long ones if you have the time. It gets you out the house, clears you head, and makes is healthy for you. If you have something else you like that's physical do that. Anything that creates motion in your body is good for you.

Hi Chuff,
Thanks So Much For Your Advice. I Already Have A Gym Membership And I Did As You Suggested. The Time At The Gym Is Really A Great Way To Release/ Escape. I Realize Now That I Spent So Much Time Worrying About What Wasn't That I Had Neglected Myself In The Process!! Having Time To Reflect Is Really A Great Way To Regroup. I Know That Eventually The Pain Will Subside And I Will Eventually Be Whole Again

Once Again, Thanks For The Reply

Jazzie

Copied from another one of my posts:

Its time to accept the harsh truth and start the transition to single life. Its hard but whatever doesn't kill us makes us stronger right? More wary in the future and aware what we are looking for in a relationship and a person.

Treat your relationship as a life experience, you might not be able to treasure the memories you had right now but one day you will. Do not regret but learn and move on, as someone much better is just around the next corner.

You must try follow these: (be strong)

1) Abide by no contact, ignorance is bliss so don't go near the 'grape vine'
2) Work on yourself entirely - hobbies, work, gym
3) Ever wanted to do something in your life? Nows the time
4) Spend more time with your friends and family and rewnew old social ties
5) Box every memory away and stay away from your fav songs for now - when you can look at it without feeling ill - Ur halfway there!
6) Time does heal :P It just takes a god dam while, but don't mope at home, go out, party, exercise - helps a hell of a lot
7) Music helps

Quote:

Originally Posted by jazzie42

Hi Chuff,
Thanks So Much For Your Advice.

Not a problem.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jazzie42

I Already Have A Gym Membership And I Did As You Suggested. The Time At The Gym Is Really A Great Way To Release/ Escape. I Realize Now That I Spent So Much Time Worrying About What Wasn't That I Had Neglected Myself In The Process!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your right in that we do tend to lose are selves in relationships so now you can have fun and rebuild yourself. Enjoy your new time as opposed to beating yourself up over it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jazzie42

Having Time To Reflect Is Really A Great Way To Regroup. I Know That Eventually The Pain Will Subside And I Will Eventually Be Whole Again

Yes you will and it will be sooner than you think if you just keep your focus on yourself and what you want for the short term. Good luck.