Within the past few days, my girlfriend broke up with me. We were together for almost 2 years and she chose to tell me we were done over a phone call. Also, I had not seen this coming at all, it was completely unexpected.

Of course we had our fights, just like any other relationship seeing as how the so-called "perfect" relationship simply does not exist. But I felt as though we were always able to talk things through and come to an understanding. She told me her reasoning was that she had lost romantic feelings for me. This was very hard for me to grasp because she wasn't very specific as to why, she just wanted time to be single.

I'm 19, she is 18. We met young, and are still very young, but our relationship was very special and we were extremely close. She fears of being tied down too early in her life and she says that "she doesn't feel like being in a relationship right now."

My emotions consist of depression, anger, shock, and confusion. This is by far the most difficult thing I've ever had to deal with in my 19 years. I feel as though I've wasted 2 years of my life, especially some crucial years that impact who I am for the rest of my life. I always thought that I'd have her around and now she's gone...

Could someone offer me some words of advice/encouragement?

"My emotions consist of depression, anger, shock, and confusion." What's the point? You can't control decisions or feelings of other people, including those who you are in a relationship with. Yes breakups suck, and you feel bad, but you don't have to feel bad. You need to move your life forward by occupying your time with other stuff and other friends. We have all been through this and we have all survived. You will as well.

You know you are very young, and I would argue too young to be in such a committed relationship. She made her choice and there's nothing you can do about it. So this door has closed. Now kick the new door to your life open. The way you accept this action by her is your choice. You can let it ruin your days and weeks, or you can move forward realizing since there's nothing you can do about it, you might as well move forward.

She wants to explore and experiment in her world without you, and its very typical to feel that way at your ages. Its also typical to feel as you do when you get dumped. We all have gone through this in our lives, some more than others, so take heart that you are not alone in dealing with a break up.

Leave her alone and your hurt feelings will heal, you will rebuild, regroup, and get back into the groove of life and do your own exploring and experimenting. You may even find that you too will be in a position to understand that feelings do change as you learn and grow.

For now you are and will be in a bit of shock, hurt and disappointment but those feelings will change in time. Knowing all that never saves the pain of a break up, it just sucks.

You know what? At least she didn't do this over text. I heard that texting break-ups is fairly common.

I know it's difficult but you are young. Move forward. There are others out there and you will eventually meet someone that will make you forget all about her.

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but our relationship was very special and we were extremely close

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There is a phrase for what you are going through. Its called teenage angst. The relationship was special to YOU, obviously not so much to her. YOU felt extremely close, obviously she no longer felt that. The odds of a relationship between your ages lasting long term are small. If you didn't understand that and prepare for it, you have been immature and foolish. Life will go on, you will meet other girsl, you will grow up and mature and realize this was not meant to be. So just go on with your life.

You 'wasted' two years of your life? If that's your attitude, I feel sorry for any future relationships, and for you in general. Each event, person, interaction, feeling, every tiny little moment in your life is part of the learning experience that is you, that becomes a new you. Good and bad, it all leads you to wisdom. So she doesn't want a boyfriend anymore, at EIGHTEEN? She can't be expected to want one. A healthy life at 18 is many friends, some dating, a boyfriend maybe. At 18 we are changing on a dime, in what we want out of life and people and school and careers and places.

Try being dumped when you are 44, after 13 years. Then you get my sympathy.

You anger will stand by you, however, and help you get over this. It's when you wallow in grief too much that there is danger of it lasting too long. Your friends can take you places and say things like 'what good is a woman who breaks up over the phone?' and so on. That's their job, and it's OK to tell them so.

Someday you will break up with a woman. It's good that you know what it feels like. ADD this to your wisdom portfolio.

As was said... you are in the age range were people are maturing emotionally and intellectually, and frequently its suddenly in opposite directions.

No easy way through it, it almost always sucks... it sucks more when the other person decides. But you get over it, you grow a bit more as a result, and how you learn to cope with it becomes part of your character... good or bad.

Life goes on... eventually you will look back and wonder why you let it bother you as much as it does. That's the benefit of hindsight. We've all been there numerous times. You never know what a GOOD relationship is until you've had a bunch of failures to compare each new on to.

I feel sad hearing that you feel you wasted 2 years of your life with her because she dumped you. If that's really how you feel, you should never date again. No relationship is a guarantee to last forever, not even marriage! If you go into every relationship expecting it to last, instead of just enjoying the person you're with, enjoying every moment, then yes, you're wasting your time.

I've been with my husband since we were both 19, no regrets. But we both dated a lot before we met, loved and lost, and by the time we found each other, and realized how great we were together, we didn't need to move on. Been married 19 years now, together for 24, no regrets. He's my best friend. We have two wonderful kids together, a lot of pets, a home, and a life. My oldest child is just 3 years younger than you. You're a baby. You really are. I was a baby at 19 too, I just got lucky and met my one and only when I was young. I'm not by any means the norm.

If tomorrow my husband told me it was over, he wanted out, yes, I'd be upset. I'd be depressed. I'd be angry. I'd feel all the things you're feeling now. I've felt those things with past relationships. But, and this is important, I'd never regret the 24 years we've had. I'd never regret the good times, I'd never regret my children, I wouldn't regret any of it. I wouldn't consider it time wasted. The fact that you do, says a lot about you, and it's something I really think you need to fix.

You're young. Breakups are the norm when you're young, especially when you start seriously dating at a very young age. Most teens grow apart as they get older. That's why adults tell young teens not to get too serious so soon, because chances are very good that it won't last.

So lick your wounds for a while. Being sad is okay, and it's normal. Of course you're going to be sad, you lost someone you still care about, and it's out of your control. You can't force her to stay with you just because you still want the relationship. That's the bad part of loving someone, you can't force them to love you back. It hurts. It's part of being human, and every single person that didn't grow up in a convent, has experienced what you're feeling now, and guess what, it hurt like hell, but we all survived, and we all found someone that cared about us, just as much as we cared about them. We all moved on, and we all got over it, and so will you.

First, a phone call is more than most get, today, many break up with a text or email. And many just never hear from them again.

There is no good break up, and there is no closure so don't think there ever is.

Two years, and you had your fights, no, most couples have small disagreements but not a lot of fights.

Two years, did you finish high school, go on to school, or go to work?

There has to be life, outside of a girlfriend or boyfriend. Dating, is a path of learning, you learned a lot, and know many things not to do, and things to do, next time.

In my honest opinion, as a woman, I can say that she may of ended it with you down the phone because it would be far too hard to do it in person? Especially after a 2 year relationship... She probably feels terrible for having to do that.
Saying you feel like you've wasted two years is never a good attitude to have. My ex said that when I ended it with him and it was so hurtful! All that time you spent together are formed memories and good times had between you, you can't say it was a waste of time...

You're still so young, you've still got your whole life ahead of you, don't spend any more time being upset or angry about this - It'll never get better.
Maybe even take your emotion out on a hobby or something? Keep your mind occupied and be happy in yourself, something good will come of it :)