Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Jokes (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=385)
-   -   Wisdom from military manuals (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=794113)

  • Jun 11, 2014, 10:48 AM
    smoothy
    Wisdom from military manuals
    WISDOM FROM MILITARY MANUALS



    'If the enemy is in range, so are you.'
    - Infantry Journal-

    'It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just
    bombed.'
    - US.Air Force Manual -

    'Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword, obviously never
    encountered automatic weapons.'
    - General MacArthur -

    'You, you, and you... Panic. The rest of you, come with me.'
    - U.S. Marine Corp Gunnery Sgt.-

    'Tracers work both ways.'
    -U.S. Army Ordnance Manual-

    'Five second fuses only last three seconds.'
    -Infantry Journal -


    The three most useless things in aviation are: Fuel in the bowser;
    Runway behind you; and Air above you.
    -Basic Flight Training Manual-

    'Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once.'
    - Maritime Ops Manual -

    'Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.'
    - Unknown Marine Recruit-

    'If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him.'
    -USAF Ammo Troop-

    'Yea, Though I Fly Through the Valley of the Shadow of Death, I Shall
    Fear No Evil. For I am at 50,000 Feet and Climbing.'
    - Sign over SR71 Wing Ops-

    'You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach3.'
    -Paul F. Crickmore (SR71 test pilot)-

    'The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.'
    -Unknown Author-

    'If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage it has to be a
    helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe.'
    - Fixed Wing Pilot-

    'When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane, you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.'
    -Multi-Engine Training Manual-

    'Without ammunition, the USAF is just an expensive flying club.'
    -Unknown Author-

    'If you hear me yell;"Eject, Eject, Eject!", the last two will be
    echos.' If you stop to ask "Why?", you'll be talking to yourself, because you're the pilot.'
    -Pre-flight Briefing from a 104 Pilot-

    'What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots?
    If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; but If ATC screws up,.
    the pilot dies.'
    -Sign over Control Tower Door-

    'Never trade luck for skill.'
    -Author Unknown-

    The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in military
    aviation are: 'Did you feel that?' 'What's that noise?' and 'Oh S.. '
    or (appended from the Arkansas Air National Guard):"Hold my beer and watch
    this!"
    -Authors Unknown-

    'Airspeed, altitude and brains. Two are always needed to successfully
    complete the flight.'
    -Basic Flight Training Manual-

    'Mankind has a perfect record in aviation -
    we have never left one up there!'
    - Unknown Author -

    'Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a
    person on the ground incapable of understanding or doing anything about it.'
    - Emergency Checklist-

    'The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world;
    it can just barely kill you.'
    - Attributed to Max Stanley (Northrop test pilot) -

    'There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime.'
    -Sign over Squadron Ops Desk at Davis-Montham AFB, AZ-

    'If something hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to.'
    - Sign over Carrier Group Operations Desk-

    'You know that your landing gear is up and locked when it takes full
    power to taxi to the terminal.'
    - Lead-in Fighter Training Manual -

    As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft, having torn
    off the wings and tail in the crash landing, the crash truck arrives. The rescuer sees a bloodied pilot and asks,'What happened?' The pilot's reply:
    'I don't know, I just got here myself!'
  • Jun 11, 2014, 02:46 PM
    Catsmine
    The Navy rule about firefights: Send the Marines.
  • Jun 11, 2014, 04:44 PM
    smearcase
    Tell it to the U.S. Navy Seals.
  • Jun 11, 2014, 05:40 PM
    Catsmine
    The LPO of Team 2 Delta company told it to me.

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 05:44 PM.