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-   -   Summertime Without Friends (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=793266)

  • May 31, 2014, 10:13 AM
    ry65
    Summertime Without Friends
    I'm 19 years old, just finishing off my first year at university. I moved to my current home two years ago coming from the United States into Canada and attended a private school. It is extremely small, only about 250 kids, grade 6-12, with 50 of them in my grad class. My grad class was the worst the school has ever seen, with multiple suspensions and kids getting expelled, and many kids were not very nice. My only real friend was my girlfriend, whom I dated for two years. We hung out every single weekend and neither of us hung out with other people outside of school. When I got to university, I instantly made a lot of amazing friends. My girlfriend and I broke up before the end of the school year, and now that I've been back home from school for a month, I am incredibly bored with no one to hang out with. All of my university friends live in different parts of the country, and the only friend I met who lives here has been ignoring me and has focused his time on his girlfriend. It sucks even more because my girlfriend has lots of friends she met through camp, and has been kept busy while I have no one to hang out with. I still have 2-3 more months until school starts, and I don't know what to do with my time. I am bored of video games and watching TV all the time. I go running occasionally, but that's it. I'm always afraid of when I leave the house, because I feel like people from my high school will see me and notice I have no friends. I need some advice on how to keep myself busy or to possibly make new friends. I'm a normal, funny guy and I find I don't have have a whole lot of trouble making friends, but I can be very shy at times. I know this is long, but any advice would help.
  • May 31, 2014, 10:48 AM
    parttime
    Hi ry and welcome, you have three months find a parttime job or do volunteer work. That can keep you busy. Good luck and check back for more suggestion from the experts here.
  • May 31, 2014, 01:46 PM
    tickle
    Oh, yes, agree with parttime, find a job for heavens sake !
  • May 31, 2014, 01:48 PM
    tickle
    Find a job for heavens sake. That is what the busy kids do with their time; then they have money they have made to enjoy themselves with, or maybe save up for something really worthwhile.
  • Jun 4, 2014, 08:14 AM
    Oliver2011
    No friends? Go make new friends. You can do that by doing the things the others have suggested. Join a club, take tennis lessons, or whatever you like to do as fun. This one is easy for you to solve, but you have to take the first step. And honestly, why worry about what your high school friends will think anyway?
  • Jun 4, 2014, 08:20 AM
    smoothy
    I agree with everyone... life is what you make it... if you want friends you go out and make friends, if you need money you go find a job and earn it... if you want to wallow in self pity about having no friends or money... sit in your room alone all the time.

    You can overcome shyness if you really want to. It takes work and determination.
  • Jun 4, 2014, 07:09 PM
    dontknownuthin
    My son had friends in high school but the rest go to a local college. He is the only one who left home for university. Coming home, he found he has nothing in common with them and similarly, no social plans.

    He is working part time in a garden business and taking side jobs wherever he can. He is also taking a summer Spanish class in community college so he can have a lighter load next year. He hangs out with friends from work and with our family. Don't worry what other people think. They know you left for school and are just home for summer. They don't know what you're doing when they see you alone. Walk with confidence and nobody will think a thing of it.

    Accomplished adults don't see that much of friends day to day - we have things to do, and see friends when we can. You will see yours when you return to campus - now, you are spending time with family.

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