I'm faithful at my church, never been in trouble with the law, I have no kids, I work, attend school, and yet I still have a 11pm curfew. I respect that curfew, by trying to come in at least 10 minutes before 11. I just feel like its time to sit my parents down so that we can come to a compromise.

Sure... you can move out, rent your own place and start to pay your own bills. Then you can do anythign you want, or afford to do.

Right now its your parents house... they get to set the rules... and you get to respect them. YOU don't get to make the rules in THEIR house. Particularly since THEY are paying all the bills.

WHere do you think you have the right to sit your parents down and tell them whats going to happen in their own house?

It really is THEIR house.....THEY own it..not you, as an adult they are being nice allowing you to stay there. So you think you can start making demands now?

...OR....it could be time to move out on your own where you get to make the rules yourself.

I don't think OP wants to make the rules, and maybe 'sitting his parents down' was a broad statement, and if he is 20 then yes he can have a quiet talk with his parents to see if they can extend his curfew. What is wrong with that guys? He appears to have all of his ducks in a row.

He is over 18; we don't know what he helps out with around the house; could be he is doing his duty and did you read that he works, too?

So, yes, take the time to have a heart to heart talk with your parents and see how it comes out and let us know. They could have forgotten how far you have progressed because you all get along so well together.

First, I agree with you that an 11 PM curfew for a 20 yr old is a bit on the unreasonable side. So I see no problem in your sitting down with your parents and discussing an easing of their curfew rules. That being said, I agree with the others, that as long as you live under their roof, they are entitled to make the rules you have to live by. If they refuse to compromise, then your only choice is to move out on your own.

A compromise would mean he (or she) would be willing to give something up, When they have nothing to give up. I for one don't think a curfew is a bad idea... the parents probibly work and have to get up in the morning... and would be woken up at all hours of the night by someone staggering in. Never mind they have classes to attend every day at college... ones the parents are probibly footing the bill for.

I see a lot of reasons this would negatively affect their studies... most of which they don't recognise.


Yeah... I remember the college years too... I had a curfew... I respected it because they were paying all the bills (except the student loans)... I got to do what I could afford to do after I got my own place.

Plus my parents made it clear... our house , our rules... and I did have wonderful and giving parents. I felt it was a fair trade for what they were giving me.

Yes, Smoothy, but this is a different time and place, and he works, so how do you know specifics like who is footing the educational bill?

Rules can be broken on a compromise, without hard feelings from either party.

Compromise may not be the proper word here. But if the OP is as good a child as claimed, the parents should be willing to ease up somewhat.

Unless they are incredibly hardcore, it can't really hurt to try to talk to them. What is there really to lose?

Get your own place! No parent should allow any child of any age living in their house come in when they please! Deal with whatever cyrfew they give you or move out now!!

You can talk to them, but most likely they do not sleep, till you are home, and waiting up to 1:00 may not be reasonable either. At 20, I know my children had to be home by 11 on work nights. And either had to arrange that they would be gone all night somewhere, or be home by 1:00 on weekend.

I would assume weekends are different. I say that since my 17 year olds could be out till 12:00

But sit down with them and discuss it.

A wide ranging discussion about where your life is at and where you want it to go is never a bad idea. Discussing curfew as a part of that discussion would be expected. Your parents' reasons for curfew are apparently sensible, as you have complied up until now. If some of those reasons no longer apply, that lifestyle discussion would be the place to consider modifying them.