My 18 year old goddaughter has been receiving ss checks from her fathers disability. She recently received a rather large check for back pay when she proved she was not finishing high school until this month. She has since left home and is living from home to home. Is she entitled to all the money at once or can it be given to her in smaller amounts as she has proven she just wastes money. It is now in a joint account with her mother. She just had repairs done to her car, has a speeding ticket and also her car insurance is due. Can her mother legally pay these expenses from this money? She will receive one more monthly check as she has now graduated from homeschooling. She is currently threatening her mother with a lawsuit if she doesn't give her ALL of her money and has also quit her job. She left home because she didn't want to obey simple house rules. She also has a 7 month old daughter who she leaves with fathers family for extended periods but that is currently going to court about custody.

As far as legality, I am unable to offer any advice. I would think that since she is legally an adult, she has rights to the money. Suing her mother would probably be of no benefit as I am sure the court costs would deplete the disputed money.

Honestly, it seems that you are describing a very immature, entitled little girl that needs to get acquainted with the adult world ASAP. I say let her have the money. As long as she is able to stamp her foot and make a scene, she will continue to do so. She's 18. She's an adult now. Especially having a child. I'd say it's time to let her make mistakes and screw up and then be forced to be responsible for her own poor decisions. Let her waste the money. At this rate, she will most likely end up losing custody of her child and then have to pay child support and she will be wishing she hadn't been so frivolous with her spending then.

I wish you the best of luck. Whatever happens though, I'd make sure to be there in the aftermath to say "I told you so".

Thank you Krissy. My feelings exactly. She has been allowed to do as she wanted forever. Her mother is my best friend and she is just now realising what she has done. The girl will not speak to me s I told her how I felt several months ago. And up until then we were so very close. She just can't handle the truth. I just hope somehow she grows up before it is too late. A couple of weeks ago the father or rather his "wife" had her every other weekend. All of a sudden now it is every other week. The step mother is running the show, for now. The father is on the road all week and only home on weekends. I personally do not feel she has any right to her but... oh well I am not getting into it until it goes to court. Thanks again.

She can't have it both ways - she may be 18, but the only reason she got the money past 18 is because she hadn't finished high school. I would GUESS that legally her mother can still claim the right to use the money for her daughter's debts in the joint account, and should do so, now before school officially ends. Again, I'm just guessing. The mother can certainly contact SS. Going in person to the nearest office is best.

Even though she is 18 and should be on her own, this young new mom appears to be a bit out of control, and I think she will need some time to get her act together. I don't know if it's legal to hold onto her money or not, but until the court made me, I would sure would not want to give it to a jobless teen in crisis.

However, since she wants to learn on her own about the reality of life and has left the house with her baby, I think SHE is responsible for her own life. Give her the money, all of it, and let her learn the hard way. She may fall flat on her face, with or without the money, but its for her to manage her own life, and as a parent, love, support, and kiss her booboo when she needs it. Parents have the best intentions but when its time to let go, its time to let go.

She is an adult, let her be one, as shaky as she is at this time. Parents can only teach and guide unfortunately, we can't take the test for our kids, nor should we do so. It's a tough call either way.

Thank you, everyone, for your opinions. Since the mother is not on the computer I have been reading them to her. She also really appreciates it. She is going between trying to get her daughter to understand she may lose her baby, which could very well happen, to just shutting off her phone and ignoring her whining! For the most part she is only enablng her.

You asked this under Law, and this forum is supposed to address the law. None of us know exactly how SS views funds in a joint account on the day a minor turns 18. The mother needs to either find out or make the decision ASAP to pay old bills or hand it over.

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Originally Posted by sandyh62

... It is now in a joint account with her mother.. .

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Normally either person holding a joint account can draw funds from that account. So the mother should pay the repairs, ticket, and insurance; before the daughter figures out that she can just take the money.

And, since "possession is nine points of the law" (out of a possible 10, I guess), Mom should consider transferring the balance into another account which Daughter cannot touch. The daughter's threat of suit is, in all likelihood, bluff. She doesn't have a case and probably doesn't have an attorney willing to take such a non-existent case either.

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Originally Posted by joypulv

... None of us know exactly how SS views funds in a joint account on the day a minor turns 18....

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It's not up to the Social Security Administration to decide, in any event.

The funds that were recieved are the belongings of the parent / gaurdian. Since the child is 18 years of age yet still in school they have not been fully emancipated. If they want to claim emancipation by the fact they turned 18 then let them give the money back. The money is for the childs care and welfare. Not pocket money.

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Originally Posted by cdad

...Since the child is 18 years of age yet still in school they have not been fully emancipated. ...

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In most states (with two or three exceptions I believe) a child who has reached the age of 18 is legally an adult, whether still in school or not.

I don't see anyway for the girl to win a lawsuit against her mother over this. Yes, her mother can spend the money on the daughter. That is why the checks were being sent, for the mother to use on the care of the child. This is one of those things like child support being for the care of the child. If it was for the dependent to spend as they want it would not stop at graduation. That being said, I would probably just give her the money and let her find her way that she is so determined to find. With this though, means that they need to have separate bank accounts and insurance policies so it doesn't have a negative mark on the mothers insurance if the daughter chooses not to pay. Of course the relationship can get worse before it gets better and if the father of the baby is fighting for custody and has a lawyer he could win. If that does happen, I hope that the mother/grandmother and the baby's father have a good relationship so she can still see the baby.