Ask Me Help Desk - 12 year old dating a 17 year old?

12 year old dating a 17 year old?

I'm a 12 year old girl and my boyfriend is 17. He's not with me for sex, he's told me that he does not want us to have sex until marriage. I'm really mature for my age and don't like dating guys my own age because they are way to immature. A lot of people would think that he is just with me for sex, but he is with me because he loves me, we have no sexual relationship and won't until we marry. He is a former muslim and is coverting to Christian for me, if that doesn't show that he loves me I don't know what does. I would like to know your opinion on our relationship and the age difference.

Seriously, NO WAY.
The age and maturity difference at this stage is far too much.
If you were both adults then it would be a different matter, but as it stands there's too much potential for VERY BAD things to happen.
Also in less than a year he will become and Adult at that opens up a whole new can of worms taht you are no where near ready to deal with.

A 17 year old boy interested in a 12 year girl has issues. This is not normal. He may tell you it's not sex but he's lying. How long has he been your boyfriend?
How do your parents feel about this?
You're not even in High School and he's about out. This guy is a creep.

Do your parents approve of him and this relationship? Personally my 12 year old would never be allowed in such a relationship, and honestly, he would be in jail for any contact with her.

So what do your parents say? Do they even know? Be honest.

Do your parents allow you to date and do they know about him including his age?

Frankly, I think 12 year olds should not be involved in one-on-one dating.

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Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

A 17 year old boy interested in a 12 year girl has issues. This is not normal. He may tell you it's not sex but he's lying. How long has he been your boyfriend?
How do your parents feel about this?
You're not even in High School and he's about out. This guy is a creep.

He's already out of high school and has graduated collage. He's not with me for sex, his religion does not allow him to have sex before marriage, it's considered a sin. He's been my boyfriend for 2 months, I met him on Facebook. My parents do not support our relationship not only because of the age difference, but because he is Muslim.

Have you met in real life?

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Originally Posted by Cat1864

Do your parents allow you to date and do they know about him including his age?

Frankly, I think 12 year olds should not be involved in one-on-one dating.

My parents do allow me to date, but do not approve of him because he is Muslim.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cat1864

Have you met in real life?

No but we talk all the time and video chat, he is planning on coming to Canada to meet me and to have a better life.

Quote:

Originally Posted by talaniman

Do your parents approve of him and this relationship? Personally my 12 year old would never be allowed in such a relationship, and honestly, he would be in jail for any contact with her.

So what do your parents say? Do they even know? Be honest.

My parents do know about our relationship, but do not approve because he is Muslim.

So you aren't actually in a relationship, online does NOT count for anything.
This is a HUGE RED FLAG situation and he is GROOMING you !!!
Get out of the way NOW !!!!!

But have you ever met in person? Do you intend on disobeying your parents? How far away is he? You are asking for trouble getting involved with a internet stranger at 12!!

Sex or no sex, a 17 year old boy should not be interested in you at your age. He says it's a sin to be having sex with you but does not think it is to have you disobey your parents?
Have you met this boy? How do you know he is what he says he is. He has graduated college at 17?
You need to leave him alone

Quote:

Originally Posted by Curlyben

Seriously, NO WAY.
The age and maturity difference at this stage is far too much.
If you were both adults then it would be a different matter, but as it stands there's too much potential for VERY BAD things to happen.
Also in less than a year he will become and Adult at that opens up a whole new can of worms taht you are no where near ready to deal with.

I don't get why it is any different then a 5 year age difference with adults. My parents have a 7 year age difference, and my gradparents had a 23 year age difference.

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Originally Posted by bizzlelover

I don't get why it is any different then a 5 year age difference with adults. My parents have a 7 year age difference, and my gradparents had a 23 year age difference.

You are a child, he is almost an adult. That is the difference. Adults don't date minors. Someone his age should not be messing with you, should not even be interested in you. Have you met him? I would imaging he is a lot older than 17.

Quote:

Originally Posted by bizzlelover

No but we talk all the time and video chat, he is planning on coming to Canada to meet me and to have a better life.

What country does he live or rather claims to live in at this moment?

You do realize that people on the internet lie about themselves, don't you? He may not be who and what you think he is. Two months of on-line communication is not dating and it isn't even scratching the surface of getting know a person.

You are NOT an adult. The rules are different because by law you are a minor and have ADULTSS responsible for you. Its simple, because that's the LAW!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

Sex or no sex, a 17 year old boy should not be interested in you at your age. He says it's a sin to be having sex with you but does not think it is to have you disobey your parents?
Have you met this boy? How do you know he is what he says he is. He has graduated college at 17?
You need to leave him alone

He does think it is a sin for me to disobey my parents and is planning on talking to them to get them to approve of our relationship. He lives in Pakistan, there they start school at 5 and end at 15, then they have 2 years of collage. He makes me very happy and we have a lot in common.

You are a minor child, living with your parents. He has no business planning to meet you. Do your parents know you are video chatting with him and that he claims to be 17?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cat1864

What country does he live or rather claims to live in at this moment?

You do realize that people on the internet lie about themselves, don't you? He may not be who and what you think he is. Two months of on-line communication is not dating and it isn't even scratching the surface of getting know a person.

He lives in Pakistan. We have talked for more then 2 months we just started dating 2 months ago. I know people can lie on the internet, that's why I took time to make sure he's really who he says he is. For him to lie would be a sin, then he would be cursed by Allah.

Quote:

Originally Posted by bizzlelover

He does think it is a sin for me to disobey my parents and is planning on talking to them to get them to approve of our relationship. He lives in Pakistan, there they start school at 5 and end at 15, then they have 2 years of collage. He makes me very happy and we have a lot in common.

Girl, you don't even know this guy in 2 months time, and there is very little a 17 year old young man has in common with a 12 year old girl. This is an older guy talking to you and your hormones are probably kicking in.
I would bet the bank that he will not come to Canada to meet you. Any 17 year old in his right mind would not be speaking this way to a 12 year old.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

You are a minor child, living with your parents. He has no business planning to meet you. Do your parents know you are video chatting with him and that he claims to be 17?

Yes, they to know. They don't care about the age, they don't approve of him because he is Muslim.